to not understand Christians who have sex/live together before marriage then marry in church?

[onlytwo]

Posting here because I am genuinely confused and not trying to offend anyone.

I keep seeing couples who describe themselves as Christians who have been living together for years, sometimes with kids, then they get married in church with all the religious vows etc. I thought one of the key Christian teachings is no sex before marriage yet it seems really common that people ignore that part but still have a big church wedding.

AIBU to think it is hypocritical?

What vulgar language have I used? Have you confused me with @PlumLemur who talks about ‘fucking points’? Do you not find her language ‘vulgur’?

Or is her language ok because you agree with her?

But Christian scripture has repeatedly said it isn’t allowed. Why do you keep dismissing that?

'Says it in the Bible' isn't entirely straightforward. The Bible is a collection of Hebrew, Aramaic and Greek writings collected and curated over a period of time by committees of men, and then translated. These writings are of their time, though occasional transcendent passages appear, like the Sermon on the Mount. The Bible says that women should not speak in Church or have authority over men; two edicts that are rarely followed by 21C churches. Whatever was frowned on as 'fornication' or 'sexual immorality' at the time may be very different from a committed couple setting up home together nowadays.

I would love to know where Jesus said this 😂

Islam is not Christianity.
Islam is firmly been stuck in the past.
Christianity has moved on, albeit kicking and screaming.
Gay marriage is still a no no for the most part, hopefully that will be normalised soon too.

Why keep bringing Islam into it? The thread is about Christianity and sex before marriage.

Then what is the point of religion that has to keep shifting with societal norms? Why does Christianity have to move on by kicking and screaming?

Plenty of Christians still adhere to the Bible and refrain from pre-marital sex.

Christians are sinners, just the same way every other human being is. There are many people who come to find Jesus later in life also, which would explain their non Christian lifestyle beforehand also.

I am wondering this. They keep bring Judaism into it too.

Any interesting debate turns into ‘Nothing to see here, look over there’.

I completely agree that everyone, including Christians are human and makes mistakes. Of course, many people find faith later in life, which can explain choices they made before becoming Christian.

But that’s not what I’m asking about. I’m curious about people who already identify as practicing Christians while having premarital sex or living together, and who seem to believe that it’s perfectly compatible with their faith rather than acknowledging it goes against traditional Christian teachings.

So it’s not about someone’s life before they became a Christian, but how they reconcile these choices while identifying as Christian.

Genuinely curious OP, how many Christians have you personally spoken to that have said premarital like sex is ok? I can't imagine a Christian saying that being Christian myself and surrounded by other Christians. Perhaps they might admit to premarital sex but accept its sinful which is different to saying it's "okay".

Not read the full thread BTW! Sorry!

Some Christians follow the teachings of Christ himself who said:
‘The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’

I wish all Christians did.🙃

You used the word “fuck”. Many religions it’s forbidden to swear.

I’m not dismissing that, like I said different Christian groups interpret the Bible in different ways, which you and the op are choosing to ignore. I think your confusion is coming from the viewing the Bible as a whole, rather than the two testaments. The Old Testament is shared with Judaism and contains Hebrew Scriptures whilst the New Testament focus on Christianity. So depending which group of Christians you belong to, you’ll interpret the bible differently as all these groups have different interpretations and certain passages will be excluded from their views.

That was not @nomas who said that.

The idea that religion evolves to move with the times just means that it will get more and more diluted and then what is the point?

I’ve always believed that the Bible is a moral compass but if we keep adjusting it to suit current social norms then eventually it will mean nothing.

Churches are already empty and I think they have to ‘relax’ their rules to keep relevant, attract a congregation and this allows for more leniency on sin.

Why shouldn't’ i? We’re talking about religion. I also brought Judaism into the discussion, as it’s very much relevant to the Old Testament.

Because Judaism is very much relevant to to old testament, you can’t ignore that.

@onlytwo how would you like acknowledge of one’s failings to stick to scripture? Would you like people to apologise to the congregation for living together before they walk down the aisle? As the church elders to discuss and decide?
As a Christian I am kind, I do not steal or lie, I help others and try not to judge. I believe in the miracle of resurrection and pray daily.
But….. my children were at my wedding. DH and I were together for ten years (with two children) before we got married. That makes me no less of a Christian.

Gay priests are very much a thing

Judaism is quite important to this discussion given that Jesus and most of his disciples were Jews.

You’re mistaken or lying, I’ve not used the ‘fuck’ except to quote @PlumLemur or @L0bstersLass who used the words ‘fucking’ and ‘fuck’.

Can you explain why you haven’t called them out on their language? Is it because you agree with them?

Of course people can interpret scripture as they wish, OP’s point is that Christian scripture is clear that sex outside of marriage is not allowed,

It’s not interesting when you’re ignoring what people are telling you, it’s ignorance. You know Jesus was a Jew right? Very relevant to the discussion.

Only in the year 2025. A hundred years ago you would have been frowned upon. A hundred and fifty years ago you may have even been shunned.

Christianity has had to stay relevant by relaxing its standpoint on sin otherwise churches would be empty.

A fact they clearly overlooked