Feeling wounded by DP's comment about a fitness video I sent him.

[ExplosiveDiorEar]

Today I achieved a big personal fitness goal I've been working towards for about a year - squatting 1.5x my body weight for five reps.

A woman I train with videoed me doing it. In the video, the gym instructor is stood a step or two behind me, has his hands level with my armpits and is squatting along with me. All very standard practice for spotting someone when they're lifting.

I sent the video to DP.

At the end of the session, the gym instructor gave me a creme egg and was really effusive in his praise. The woman I train with was also full of hearty congratulations. I came away feeling completely pumped and proud.

When I got home, I did a muscle man pose for DP as soon I was through the front door and said "Well, what did you think?" I hoped expected some kind words or congratulations. He knows how hard I've worked for this and has been supportive.

But he just said "Tom's a bit handsy isn't he?"

It completely took the wind out of my sails. I know I'm probably overreacting but I just felt so gutted that's the first thing DP said. No "well done" or "great work", just a comment about the instructor. Even if DP had legitimate concerns about the gym instructor being handsy (which he's not at all), surely he could've saved them until later or tomorrow.

Sorry, I just feel deflated. I'm probably overreacting.

Yeah, you’d like it.

This. I wasn't into martial arts, but I showed interest in my late husband's achievements. (He took up Shotokan Karate in his late 50s and got his black belt in his early 60s.)

I think you are massively overreacting!!

Try posting “my husband made me watch a video of him doing weights then got annoyed at me when I didn’t say well done, now he’s being arsey with me”

I know what responses you’d get

Oh dear, does he not like you improving yourself then? The correct response should have been 'fuck me, that's bloody impressive!' Because it is!

That's also pretty bloody impressive!

OP simply wanted her DP to congratulate her. She's not asking for wider recognition.

OP, that is amazing and I don't know how you did it. I can scarcely lift 15 kilos which is just over a quarter of my body weight.

I don't know why your DP felt the need to take the wind from your sails.

It’s 17c where I am.

Or the actual scenario in reverse…

’I’ve been working on a personal goal in the gym and I sent my wife a video to show her that I’d achieved it. When I got home I walked in the door and all she said was ‘Tessa is a bit handsy, isn’t she’. Tessa is my personal trainer who was helping me to achieve my goal’.

well more fool you.

lol at this when the response on here if genders were reversed would be the man should stop.

Congratulations that is a huge achievement and I am very impressed, not many people an achieve that so you have worked hard!

Sounds like your DP is feeling a bit inadequate and took it out on you with his sarky comment. He doesn’t train does.

its not the point though is it?

DH was jealous, displayed it in an immature way. Sorry he brought you down. Well done on your achievement 👏🏻

😂😂😂

Thank you. I'm still proud of him. He had to have a year out when he developed heart trouble. Got a stent and a yr later got his black belt. He was a determined auld bugger!

He'd have been interested in this discussion - he was Scottish Universities weightlifting champion for his weight group more than 50 yrs ago. I have a photo of him from that time: he looks like a pocket Lou Ferrigno and I mean that in a positive way - he had an impressive set of pecs, I'll have you know.

He’s be told that his hobby was his business, his wife was fine to ignore it, he should get over himself and for good measure he’s clearly having an affair with Tessa!

🤣🤣 I was thinking something similar myself’

Only 14 here!

WTF is wrong with this forum today?

This is the weirdest thread I’ve read in ages:

1. your DP is a knob, YANBU.
2. crème eggs are available all year folks!
3. the poster who thinks it’s funny needs a head check
4. the poster who thinks videoing your gym achievements is weird, is weird.

If you have ever seen anyone spitting a squat you will know there is nothing handy about it. The trainers hands were near her elbows, not around her waist/breasts/bum

🤣 👏

Awesome achievement, well done 💪

Not making excuses. Looking for an explanation as to why a normally (op’s words) joyful and supportive and wonderful generally man should make an uncharacteristically snippy remark. A bit like some of the responses on this thread, come to think of it.