I’m probably being a prude but…

[Username73638]

…what is the deal with teenage girls running around basically naked these days?

Last week, I was driving down the road near a secondary school at letting out time and I must have seen about 5 girls’ actual bum cheeks as they were leaving school. Like, we all rolled our skirts up fairly short at school, but this was actually full knickers and bums on display… one girl was wearing a thong so it was just her whole bum on show.

Then, I was on the beach today (we live near the sea) with my two primary school aged sons and there were a group of maybe 13-14 year old girls, they were very young, more than half of whom were in thong bikinis. They spent most of the time on the beach doing a photoshoot, predominantly photos of them from behind looking out to sea, presumably for social media?!

I know teenagers have always been teenagers, but I’m pretty sure underage girls weren’t wearing thong bikinis on the beach when I was that age 😳

I could see other families on the beach felt uncomfortable with it too.

Do their parents know? Is this just how teenagers dress these days?

What the fuck are talking about?

She said her mother never would. I said the probability that she would is probable given that A - it is the most common response given and B- the mother has history for it.

It is not fake statistics. Shame you are now calling victims liars now. Yes well done you did derail it for no reason as I had talked about probability and then you then tried to explain probability to me despite me already having mentioned it. So that was you who derailed rattling on about something I already said. Well done mate!

History? By saying dont bend over? I obviously didn't want everyone to my pants. I just had great legs.

Thankyou for proving me right.

Who knows. In fact I doubt the poster knows herself. Ah well, the first few pages at least were interesting before the discussion got derailed.

Yes that you can debate and agree and disagree? Glad you finally can learn. Well done!

Shame you derailed it then!

As you were!

Almost all parents victim blame because almost all believe that X or Y would've prevented it. The percentage of parents who would blame is well into the 80% figure. So the probability your mum would is very high.

I know you’ve been asked before but can you provide a source for the statistic you’ve quoted.

Nope, that you would verbally attack me next with no basis for your wild accusations.

I didn't realise I had been asked. I was just told it was a fake source despite no one asking or me missing someone asking. I will dig it out for you.

Verbally attack? We are debating not attacking. Nope it isn't an attack. A disagreement is not an attack. Pointing out the realities of what happens as a consequence is not an attack. Just because you do not like what is being said then that is not an attack. If you cannot debate and get emotional over someone who disagrees then maybe debating is not for you. If you wish to debate then accept that people will disagree with you and will point out some harsh realities. That is life.

I agree OP.

It's worrying.

The sexualisation of children (female children) is starting younger.

My mum never allowed me to wear anything 'risque' until aged 16. Bit strict maybe, but I kind of understand it.

Even 'sensible' parents I know are letting their 7,8,9 your old daughter's wearing got pants and showing their stomachs.

I find it sad. Children are relying on us to show them boundaries. I think the parents of these sexualised children are letting them down.

My 9yr old still wears cute patterns on t shirts etc (loves animals) and certainly doesn't wear anything that's shorter than half way up thigh. Let them be innocent (it's their only chance )

You are verbally attacking almost all posters. Accusing people of all sorts with no basis and quite frankly many of your posts make little sense. Above being an example, accusing me of getting emotional and unable to debate based on nothing, it’s just ridiculous. You haven’t pointed out any harsh realities to me. I’m not sure even you know what you’re talking about anymore, you’re just on a mission to be as unpleasant to as many posters as possible now.

Children are relying on us to show them boundaries.

@SquishedMallow Yes, that’s the best way to put it.

Nah I've engaged with about 4 or 5 people so again more exaggerations. Given that some of those accused me of supporting child abuse odd and I responded to that, then you say that is attacking people and being unpleasant. When labelled as wanting children abused of course I will defend that, Why do you think I shouldn't as it is a false accusation. Or is that acceptable?

They make no sense to those who do not read properly. Well you are getting emotional calling it an attack that I disagree with you. Oh yes I have, you called it an attack to tell you the truth.

Nah just those who blame victims. By all means stand by victim blaming as your belief. I do not. I think it is wrong to blame victims.

Again more nonsensical gibberish. Where have I stood by victim blaming as my belief? You just throw accusations around willy nilly with no relation to what people are actually saying. It’s not ‘getting emotional’ to call your posts to certain posters as attacking if that’s what I believe them to be. It is pointless engaging with you.

Jellycatspyjamas
Relyea, Ahrens, Littleton, Matthews, Hoga, Ullman. There are quite a few related to social reactions to disclosure, experiences from support providers, disclosure reactions, the impact of disclosure, revictimisation etc.

When you said that me saying it is not right to tell 3 year old kids that they are responsible for controlling the behaviour of adult men.

Where did I say this?

When you criticised me for challenging someone who said they did that to their kid. You said it was wrong of me to disagree with them and that you expected me to attack you for agreeing with them telling 3 year olds that.

That’s not quite what I said was it. More twisting the narrative. I did say I expected to be your next target, I wasn’t wrong there. I’m bowing out of this madness now as no matter what anyone says you will twist it. This thread needs to stop now, it’s not a mentally good place for anyone to be and you have turned it into something quite unrelated to the original post.

@Fetaface if you have children, do you offer any guidance or instruction on reducing their risk of harm? Did you talk to them about not taking sweets from strangers? Getting into cars with men they don't know? Walking through secluded areas of town alone after dark? Keeping an eye on their drink in night clubs? If you did, and they took no notice, and god forbid, something happened, would they not disclose it because your pre warning makes you a victim blamer?
If you don't think it would make you a victim blamer to advise your children about reducing the risk of danger from predatory men in the way I've described, can you explain to me why warning your child that certain clothing will be more likely to attract more frequent and extreme street harassment is different?

Totally agree 👍

Yes, I bowed out from discussion myself with @Fetaface this morning.
But well done for trying anyhow.

I was quite upset from being accused of nasty things because I am a victim myself.

The thread was very interesting though before being derailed.
I'm hoping it can get back on track....

@Fetaface you need to answer this. You are coming across as angry and are twisting what people have said. You have obviously had a traumatic incident but it's not really what the thread is about.