Grossed out by new partner walking in when I was showering

[HelenaJl]

I have a fairly new partner, my first after my 10 year marriage ended. I stayed at his for the first time last night and went to have a shower this morning (no lock on the door). A few minutes in my partner walked in and used the loo!! He was sat there trying to talk to me and I didn’t know where to look. When I said afterwards I didn’t expect that he said it shows how comfortable he is around me and that his past relationships have always been like that so it’s just normal these days.

I can tell you in my entire marriage my ex never walked in on me to use the loo and vice versa! I found him sitting there and ‘dropping off’ a right turn off to be honest!

Same. The oooonnly thing I can think of that would excuse it a bit is if that is the only toilet in the house 🤔 otherwise just no. Quarter of a century together and just no.

Even with one loo you would ask the other person to finish their shower if it really couldn’t wait.

And you are still married even though he knows you hate it?

He had a separate not occupied loo
and he still chose to have a shit in front of you?! WTF 🚩

Well, only if the partner were shitting on the OP and not in the toilet....

Hopefully, sex and shitting are two very different things unless you are dating a coprophiliac.

Doing that might be OK in a long relationship or marriage when you are both really comfortable with each other, but early on in a relationship it is just gross. It would absolutely put me right off.

I'd take it as showing he has no respect for your privacy, and feels entitled to inflict his bodily functions on you, without considering that you might not appreciate it.

I wouldn't be happy either.

Yes actually that IS really fucking odd

I don’t know about this one OP. You’d hope he just needs a lesson in consideration.. but it is weird.

🥺🤬🤢👋

Bad manners!!!

Showering whilst he's defecating, is unhygienic. Its so personal especially in early stages of a relationship. Its not respectful. You can't leave the bathroom feeling fresh after a shower with a lingering odour. Heaven knows what he'll be doing in a few months time. And he has a downstairs loo. Maybe he was scent marking. Throw him back

Same here!

Yuck ! That's horrible ! 😮

That’s a big brown flag. Run for the hills.

Nope, bye bye, he needs to find someone that hasn’t seen him wipe his arse 🤢

God that makes it even worse. Revolting. Though I am enjoying the responses on this thread especially about the cat having more decorum. I wish we still had the 😂.

That makes it even worse. He had a choice of toilet and chose to do it in front of you. Please dump(!) him.

What the fuck?!

We'd pee with the other in the shower, but I'd be castrated if I tried a dump with my wife in the room.

Been together 41 years ,we are very comfortable with each other.But shitting in front of each other no that’s gross.A wee no problem .

Wee yes
Poo no
Especially in a new relationship.
If I was staying for first time, like you, I'd expect a knock and "is it alright to come in" before he even came in to get something.
My partner and I have managed to let each other shower, without doing a poo, for 36 years.
I'd rather not watch him wipe his arse either - and I've wiped hundreds of bums.

Wee is fine.
Poo is hell no.
Yuk.

Some things are best kept private.

When I go into the bathroom for whatever reason, I lock the door.

As a child I would get slapped legs if I wasn't sitting 'properly'.......

Worse, he just doesn't care if she likes it or not. Hence why he didn't even ask.