Grossed out by new partner walking in when I was showering

[HelenaJl]

I have a fairly new partner, my first after my 10 year marriage ended. I stayed at his for the first time last night and went to have a shower this morning (no lock on the door). A few minutes in my partner walked in and used the loo!! He was sat there trying to talk to me and I didn’t know where to look. When I said afterwards I didn’t expect that he said it shows how comfortable he is around me and that his past relationships have always been like that so it’s just normal these days.

I can tell you in my entire marriage my ex never walked in on me to use the loo and vice versa! I found him sitting there and ‘dropping off’ a right turn off to be honest!

Gross.

My DH does this all the time. It’s annoying especially when I want a quiet shower but mostly the smell makes me want to vomit sometimes. He also farts and belches sometimes!
Saying that he wouldn’t have done that early on into our relationship but I didn’t think it took too long. We are 3 kids in now so all dignity has been lost, although could still never do a number 2 in front of him!
That’s men, they are vial creatures! I think your ex was the minority tbh.

Oh yuk ! yuk yuk yuk !!!

Me too! He would never even have a wee when I'm in there even in emergency, he'd rather go the garden 😆
Yes we have sex but the thought of smelling his poo and seeing him wipe would instantly shut my vagina for life

Good lord, you lot are uptight!

Seems me and my husband are in the minority... 😂💩

Vile and shows absolutely no regard for your own feelings.
That would be me out I am afraid. Sitting there like a monarch on his throne, conquered new territory, stick a crown on me.

This is absolutely disgusting and certainly not normal , a wee yes no real issue but sitting there stinking out a poo whilst you shower is gross !

No. Many men aren't vile. You just settled for one who is.

I don't even like being in the bathroom when I'm having a poo!

Agree, OP. That is deeply unpleasant.

Hopefully he doesn't curl out a shit during sex?

That is foul and really unusual for someone to think it's ok. I would never dream of pooing in front of anyone?!

Maybe in a desperate situation my mum/a nurse if I was literally in hospital or gravely injured so needed help in the toilet. But even then I'd ask they don't come in till I've actually done it?!

You need to say it's out of order and a massive turn off. I'd also ask him how other people have felt when he did it? If he seems not to realise the issue I'd be saying he needs a lock on the bathroom door before I stay over again!

A wee is one thing but a poo is horrific . I would be telling him that it really bothered me and asking him not to do it again and if he doesn’t respect that boundary it’s goodbye (actually I think I’d be too Icked to carry on…)

Assuming the house only has one loo I don't see what choice he had. Not everyone can 'hold on'.

This is very much an individual thing

It’s flipping bizarre to do it in a new relationship

If you can get over the gross out, tell him not to do it again

His house has a downstairs loo so it wasn’t that

Seriously ! Have you no dignity!

How disgusting 🤢.

Nooooo I just couldn’t! Been married 15 years, have occasionally had DH come in for a wee while I’m in the shower but a poo absolutely not! That’s revolting 🤢

Ugh …u cave people !!!

actually bet cave people took the trouble to evacuate behind a bush - they surely wouldn’t do a dump in a communal area ???

Me and DP have absolutely no qualms about this.
However, it's not something either of us would have done at the start of the relationship.
It's developed over time.
It's fine if that's not OK with you.

well then you knock on the door and say so sorry I have to urgently use the loo and give the OP the option of coming out

You don’t subject her to the grand bowel opening like you’re Henry 8th and she’s a serving wench

Rank! 🤢

Oh HELL no! That’s so gross and inappropriate.

I cannot believe he did this without asking, the first time you stayed over. To me that is so grim and I'm not sure I would be able to get the mental picture out of my head.