End-of-year class gift drama

[bathroomadviceneeded]

My DS is in Year 1, and some parents from his class are trying to organise a group gift for his two teachers (it's a job share, so both teachers are part time).

The organiser of the gift has sent a message in the class group chat with the name of the student and how much they have contributed for the gift. Ranging from 10-40 pounds depending on the family. Next to the names families that didn't contribute there was written 'nothing'.
e.g. John - 30
Thomas - Nothing
Camille - 20
etc.

This upset a lot of parents and the group is blowing up. The organiser also rang each parent individually to ask if they would contribute to the gift. The current amount is 355 pounds, which I think is a very large amount for an end of year gift, even when split between two teachers. I'm a teacher and usually only get a few boxes of chocolates, and wouldn't expect anything more.

I think this is insane behaviour and publishing the amounts people gave is really problematic.

AIBU - This is completely normal and you should suck it up if you aren't the one organising the gift
Not unreasonable - This is insane and totally inappropriate for an end-of-year gift.

If it's a "class gift" it should be from all the children regardless of whether their parents contributed to it or not.
The children have no control over their family finances so it is unbelievably cruel to miss their names off for the various different reasons they're parents couldn't donate.
Really cruel to the children.

Pragmatic.

What’s pragmatic about excluding a child who has no control over family finances. With that attitude you shouldn’t be involved in organising class collections.

How is it? The pragmatic thing would be to do as I do and just sign it from the class without singling out those who have paid or not paid.

The organizer sends their bank details and asks for a reference of the child’s name. Hardly difficult to not know your kids class names? Some people don’t contribute and it’s assumed that they get their own gift. i don’t think teacher gifts are a huge surprise though, surely parents know it’s usually done and have the whole year to factor this in.

In 10 years of being on both sides of a class gift, I've never once seen a card signed from families who haven't contributed. It's generally accepted that they are doing their own thing. Which may be nothing

@Energywise just because a parent has had "a whole year to factor for this" doesn't mean that at this particular moment in time they have the money available to donate.

That would also be pragmatic.

But not what I've experienced. Let's say only 5 parents choose to contribute; it's not really from the class, is it?

Perhaps the parent has more than one child in the school and is struggling. How does knowing in advance help them find the money. I’m sure teachers would be horrified if they knew what was happening. Thankfully the school I was a governor at said no cash value gifts to teachers - a contribution of a book to the school Library or a card made by the child were the suggestions

Some on this thread sound like they were the class bullies when they were at school.
"You can't play with us because you're poor"

That's different.
If only 5 had donated I personally would say "seems like a joint gift isn't a popular idea" and give the money back to those who donated and suggest they do individual gifts/cards instead.

This shit should be stopped. Children should make home made gifts or cards for their teachers and that’s that, no one should be spending such money, it should be about the child doing something to show their teacher gratitude. No fucking spa’s etc, it’s wild. We bake for my DC’s teacher and the DC do most of the work, it’s a gift that comes from the heart. I recall a teacher on the radio complaining about the gifts he received, it’s all so distasteful.

I remember a thread from a couple of years ago from a teacher who received a very expensive hamper for a gift but she couldn't use it because it was full of food she was allergic too and alcohol she didn't drink.
She was told by several people on the thread that she should "be grateful they had thought of her" and "just donate it if she didn't like it" 🙄
I think some people are making these gifts about themselves - not the teachers or children.

Difference of opinion again. I think it's fine for that number to club together for a gift.

Ok that's fair if they are making it very clear that it is not a "class" gift.

That is absolutely shocking! I always organise end of year gifts and people all give different amounts depending on what they can afford / think is appropriate. Everyone’s name goes on the card because I am not a dick - to “out” people is just awful

Which was my point originally - even a 'class' gift is a gift from those who have contributed.

Yes but if 27 out of 30 children had parents who contributed it's really really unfair to not include the 3 names of the other children whose parents didn't (for whatever reason).
It's only a "class" gift if all the children's names are on it or the class name ("Love from Bluebell Class").
To not include names of all the children is petty and just downright mean.

First year I did it I had contributions from about 7 people put of 28. I still just signed the card from the class because I'd set it up as the class gift and I couldn't be arsed going back to my online banking to go through the list again and because I had no idea out of the other 14 who actively didn't want to contribute, who wanted to but couldn't and who had forgotten.

Not my business why someone hasn't contributed so I'm not going to make a point of only writing in certain names.

It's a 'nice' area. Only 15 in the class and we all knew each other well enough to know that wasn't the case.

Those who didn't contribute were clear that they were buying separately.

Getting all of the kids to sign the card when some had also written other cards is pointless.

That's unhinged. And I can't believe this is a thing???

I don't remember it being a thing full stop when I was in primary school in the 90's/early 2000's. The most I ever gave my teachers was a Christmas card!

If I was a teacher, I wouldn't really want or value loads of expensive gifts. What I would value is a child taking the time to write a message on a card and thanking me for teaching them well or whatever.

It's unfair for parents who can't afford it, and also it should be about children doing something themselves to show their gratitude.

Whilst I think that the amount collected for gifts for two teachers is insane and naming children on a list with the amount they have contributed is shocking, I have noticed the suggestion that the organiser may have done it to be transparent about the amount collected, so that her honesty isn't called into question.
There is an easy way to do this without outing non-contributers or shaming anyone. When the organiser rang for contributions she could have given each parent a number or random word. She could then have published the list with the numbers or words in place of the children's names. Parents could then easily look up their personal number or word to confirm the amount contributed was correct.