To no longer attend Wedding’s when only invited to the evening

[TeriBW]

Anyone else not a fan? Everyone is slaughtered on arrival, it’s often ‘picky’ food so nothing substantial and it’s hard to get more than a quick hello with the happy couple…

Id be much happier just attending the evening
Weddings drag on all bloody day, and are expensive to attend also

.Hours of stuff like speeches and photosgraphs to get through YAWN

Thats after a possible long nuptial mass

G

I love the evening part of a weddng - especially if it is CF and I can deposit my children with grandma and grandad for the evening.

Free night out and a chance to dress up for a change count me in!

I agree. I have been invited to one in a venue that is difficult to go to. They are basically just parties and I'm not a party person anyway.i would feel differently if I was going to the actual wedding

Free? You don't give a gift or cash? Cheeky 😉

But neither can they expect people to spend a lot of money and travel a long way and probable pay for accommodation for a party

Yabu the party in the evening tends to be the best bit of a wedding

If its local then I don't mind an evening only invite. Wouldn't bother with travelling/hotels for one though.

An invitation isn't an expectation. If I receive an invitation and it's too far or inconvenient or whatever I can decline. I don't feel like I've had an obligation put on me. It's still nice to be asked.

It doesn't happen in my culture, either. I think it's an English practice (not Irish or Scots, in my experience, correct me if I'm wrong)
I think weddings have become different for English people because the couple are often already living together, and sometimes have children. So it's not about a young couple starting out, or two families joining together.
That could be the reason for separate parts to a wedding.

Depends. I quite like an evening do, it's a chance for a bop, you don't have to be sooo dressed up and can probably slope off fairly easily when you get bored. And it doesn't take up your entire day.

You see, I love a wedding! I love to see the bride and the bridal party, and witness the ceremony. I like the reception and the celebrations. Plus I love dressing up!
We're all different 😊

If its local i wouldnt mind. If its a case of booking a hotel then no i wouldnt go either.

Can’t believe some people get offended only being invited to evening only, surely they understand some people are more important to the couple than others. Entirely upto people if they don’t want to attend tho

@RanyaJerodung no - all the evening dos I've been to have insisted no gift or cash just a good time. We did the same for our wedding.

If someone wanted a gift or cash I wouldn't object but I wouldn't view it as "paying" for a night out either as £30 in a card is cheaper than a meal out, club entry and drinks all night - strange transactional perspective you have of your friendships.

Sorry wrong thread!

Does this mean you are discounting the experiences of those who haven't been made to feel welcome (examples above) just because it hasn't ever happened to you?
'Wait at x person's house for an hour or so' or' well, maybe we could find you a chair and fit you in somewhere' when you turned up at the time specified for the evening do? That's really rude.

If it's not local, then the evening invitation is purely a matter of the bride and groom signalling to someone that they matter to them, and that they would have liked them to be present if it had been logistically possible. No one is actually expecting someone to travel a long distance and stay in a hotel overnight for an evening invitation.

No. I do not have "a strange transactional relationship" with anyone. There is no need to get so personal and extrapolate negatively about me from one post.
No need.
I was just wondering about a gift for an evening reception, which was categorised as "free", therefore I assumed at no cost whatsoever to the guests.

You have two options:

Go and enjoy yourself

Or stay at home and feel offended that you aren't an A lister

Probably because most of us woujd not say that in a discussion with friends and family about evening invites as we are likely to offend someone in that group who invited us or others just to the evebing do.

i find evebing do’s boring and prefer the day then head home. I’ve been to some which were crap for no food and no seats (partners work mate)
only ones I’d travel for is probably a cousin where my parents are there all day and sister also doing evening so I catch up with them too. Or maybe see old university mates.

YANBU. If you can't afford a party, don't throw it. I have zero sympathy for pairs of earning 30 something's than teenagers getting married.

I agree, if you don't make the A list, and it bothers you, just don't go.

I think it depends. If it's in the arse end of nowhere I wouldn't go but if they have taken the time to think of us and we would like to go, of course.
Our wedding was literally registry office straight into the reception , no meal, no speeches etc. We couldn't invite everyone we wanted as there was limited space. However we invited everyone to the party. People just invited to the evening didn't really miss out on much :)

I think it’s petty to not go because you didn’t get an all day invitation.

It honestly doesn’t bother me and I don’t understand why people take such great offence at it.

@RanyaJerodung yeah you do if you think you need to "pay" for your place at a wedding with a gift - else it's cheeky.

I don't count pennies for attending friends birthdays, weddings, christening and baby showers even though we are totally skint most of the time because I'm not a miserly git.

If you don't like evening dos then don't go, but you aren't special and no one HAS to invite you to any part of their wedding.