To choose convenience over facilities for 3 month old starting nursery?

[safetyfirst1]

FTM here and really struggling with a nursery decision for my little one who’ll be starting at 3 months. Posting here for additional traffic.

I’m self-employed so have flexibility with work schedule.

Planning 3 full days at nursery (though realistically 6 hours/day average but have to pay for the full day as the half day hours don’t suit) plus one day with grandparents weekly. The third nursery day will likely be shorter (4 hours) or sometimes skipped entirely - paying for the flexibility to get life admin sorted when needed.

Nursery 1 - The Convenient Choice

5 minutes from home, directly on route to work
£64/day
Staff seem genuinely caring with babies
Good Ofsted rating
Downsides: Converted house that needs some TLC, the nursery is also only 2 years old, limited curriculum info

Nursery 2 - The Premium Choice

Beautiful, modern facilities
Daily app updates (photos, feeding, sleep times)
Comprehensive curriculum
£85/day (affordable for us but still more expensive)
Downside: 15- 20-minute detour each way = 60 minute total extra travel daily there and back for each day he attends.

Nursery 2 is objectively better, but that’s potentially 4 hours weekly just in extra driving. We’re planning to move him to the school nursery at 2 anyway, so this is temporary.

Part of me thinks the convenience will matter more day-to-day, especially in winter, but I’m worried I’m shortchanging him by not choosing the “better” option. Then again, he’s only 3 months - does curriculum really matter at that age?

Any parents dealt with similar decisions? What would you prioritise - convenience or facilities for such a young baby?

Also, are three half days plus one day with the grandparents too much at this age?

Thanks in advance! 💙

If budget isn’t a big issue, I’d suggest getting a nanny until the baby is ~9 months old.

I think this is a better option for a baby of this age.

A 3 month old needs caring nurturing staff, not a curriculum. Go with nursery 1.

I would say it’s too much for such a small baby

Option 1 is only until 2, what’s the plan after that?

I also would consider a nanny, but only if you can cope with the dc being in the house and you being strict about your work hours not spending lots of time with baby, you might find it hard to leave a nanny to cope with crying etc.

Yes i agree with a PP that a nanny would be much better for a baby this young, if you really have to start working again that early.

But if you have to go with a nursery, then go with nursery 1 if they seem more caring with babies- babies don't care about curriculums, they need nurturing.

Nursery one imo x

At that age it's about the staff. If you feel nursery one staff are more caring and nurturing I'd go with that one.

Three and a half days, plus another with grandparents is way too much for a baby who's barely not a newborn anymore.

You had lots of lovely posters give their time and effort to give you great replies on your other thread.

How is the staff at nursery 2? You don't mention that.

Mine started nursery at 3 months and we went with the ''premium'' choice but we are lucky that it is also good location wise for us. It would still have to feel right though and with good staff so if you are saying you prefer the staff at the closest nursery then definitely go with that option.

I would definitely go for the convenient option.

Please try to ignore all the people who can't just ATFQ.

As I said on your other thread, Nanny. Yes, 3 months old is too young for nursery.

There is no ‘curriculum’ to follow until they are 3 anyway. The priority for me would be the ones who are going to be most hands on, lots of cuddling, might wear baby in a sling, would consider contact naps, very tuned into this being a very young baby who will have high care needs compared to a 1 year old.

I wouldn’t be swayed by buildings. The one we looked at that was a nice new fancy building was really shit. Look at Ofsted to an extent and ask to speak to current parents. I used to do that all the time for our nursery. If it’s a great nursery, parents will be thrilled to chat with you.

You didn't answer all her questions.

Childminder instead

Sorry if posting in two sections has offended anyone, I was genuinely trying to get as many replies as possible that’s all. It doesn’t make any of the responses ok either thread any less valuabke and I’m grateful to both!

Also, in house care DH is against he finds it weird as he spends some time working at home and doesn’t want a third party in the house which I understand.

Also to clarify, it will be two days a week 6 hours a day plus a 4 hour day sometimes so total hours will be 16 hours max a week in nursery plus 6 hours with grandparents.

It’s just we will split those hours over 2-3 days as it works better for us and I also think for baby rather than long stretches of him being there all day

Also, in house care DH is against he finds it weird as he spends some time working at home and doesn’t want a third party in the house which I understand.

This is more important than your newborn baby having familiarity, the best environment and attachment from a consistent caregiver?

What do you want for your baby? (And for you, considering you are one half of the mother baby dyad and will have to cope with incredibly strong feelings about being separated from your baby)

Awww nursery for a 3 month old? 😔 Have you no other options?

Having worked in several nursery baby rooms, I would say that nurseries are not really appropriate settings for very young babies.

@UmberJokeri do think one person with baby all day I’d worry what they weee doing tbh - are they on their phone or sleeping or actually looking after baby! At least with nursery it’s more flexible and also, there are other observers there so I feel it’s more security from a safety perspective

Not enough information in your post to make a decision between the two nurseries.
What are the baby rooms like?
How big, how many babies?
What is the age range?
What is the adult:child ratio?
How long have the staff been there and what are their qualifications?
What is turnover like? Do they use agency staff?
What are the sleeping arrangements?

@legoplaybookwhy don’t say that and what age would you say from?

Can you not get a nanny and request they are out of the house when your partner is home. To be honest I think his want over the babies needs are irrelevant and you should get a part time nanny. I think the baby would be end up in a baby seat most of the day as they won't have 1 2 1 care and be able to be held. At 3 months they will be sleeping still quite a lot.