GP displaying family photos, children's pictures dedicated to 'daddy' or 'mummy'

[Ilovepastafortea]

I'm lucky in that I've only had 2 miscarriages.

A friend of mine's DIL has now just had her 5th. Friend went to GP with her & was upset to see GP had pictures of their children & pictures obviously done by their children with annotations saying things like 'I love you daddy'.

This is all rather cute & lovely, but my friend thought rather insensitive when her DIL had recently lost a much wanted 5th PG. She also had concerns about women who are seeking fertility treatment - do they really need to be reminded how fertile their GP is?

We had a long discussion: we considered that on the plus side it shows that the GP is a family person with children & the inference is that they understand the problems of having a family. We considered that people who work in banks, in Boots, therapists, the supermarket, the Jobcentre could argue the same point. They don't display their children's photos.

I agree with her, family photos & personal pictures have no place in a GP's consulting room.

So AINBU thinking the family photos have no place in GP consulting rooms?

I had never thought about this before and I don’t really have an opinion, but I look fwd to seeing the responses.

I think YABU and there is over sensitivity happening here.

He probably needs them around to remind him he has to keep going in his thankless job.

Also, my dad was a Dr and as well as having pics of us and drawings etc he had a box of toys for children visiting the Dr to play with.

This is ridiculous.

100% over sensitivity there, it might be different if you were visiting a fertility specialist or a maternity ward where pregnancy loss is at the forefront of the conversation but not a GP office.

Where do you draw the line, physios, dentists etc?

Sorry you've both gone through this.
But yes. I think YABU.
I think it's lovely. Shows their human side and hopefully gives them a reason to smile when having a particularly shit day!

They work crazy hours and don’t get to see their kids much, so this is a way of keeping in touch with their family life while working their arse off. I think we have gone far too far with this idea of sanitising things so that no one is triggered - I have had some very upsetting fertility related situations in my life and no way would I begrudge any GP - or anyone else for that matter - putting up photos or pictures created by their children. My experience doesn’t trump other people’s pride and happiness in their family.

I think YABU. They are not doing that to remind people of how fertile they are, probably more to remind them of their family who they are probably working long hours away from/possibly their motivation to stay in a difficult and demanding job.

You’ll be offended by everyone with a child. I think you’re being emotional and sensitive

Is this for real?
Genuinely, are you actually asking this?

What an absolutely ridiculous and entitled thing to say/think. People can’t pretend not to have children in case it upsets someone experiencing fertility difficulties. I get that it’s an emotive subject but your friend is being very unreasonable.

Gently I think YABU, and I’m someone who has experienced infertility and never had a child. A GP’s office is their personal workspace, it’s not like a supermarket checkout or building society cashier’s window, and they can have personal stuff there if they want.

What the fuck? A blooming thankless job helping people day in day out and can’t have a little family photo or card on the desk?

Me neither until I went to lunch with my friend & she commented on how upsetting her DIL felt having her GP's ability to have (from what she could see) at least 3 healthy children, whereas her DIL is now pushing 40 & is facing the possibility that she & her DH may never have children. I can see her point.

Oh ffs 🤦🏻‍♀️

Yeah I’m sorry - it must be really hard, but I don’t think GPs should have to be conscious of not flaunting their fertility in your face. What else should they worry about? Covering their hair so as not to upset patients with alopecia? Wearing baggy clothes so overweight patients don’t feel like they’re showing off their healthy weight? You can’t expect a GP to be conscious of something like this. In the same way that friends and family announcing their own pregnancies aren’t doing it to rub your nose in it. That’s just life and goes on around us while we struggle with our own. That’s not to say it won’t be upsetting but so is seeing a pregnant woman or babies in the waiting room, or even a pregnant GP. Sorry if that sounds harsh, it isn’t meant to be. Its just putting it in perspective.

Yes, she is asking this. HTH

I had 4 miscarriages in a row and I could not have cared less if my GP had family photos on their desk. One of my best friends is a GP and the hours she works I wouldn’t begrudge her some personal items on her desk one bit. Kindly, you’re being oversensitive. I know it’s hard, I actually found seeing pregnant women very painful at that time more so than even seeing a baby, but these are things you can’t escape and certainly can’t police.

My OH has pictures in her office, my sister has pictures in her office, why can't a GP? I'm sorry but YABU.

No, GPs are humans and shouldn’t need to hide every aspect of their life.
Should they never get up from their chair and walk across the room incase a patient in a wheelchair gets offended?

As someone who has suffered fertility problems, this is ridiculous! I could perhaps see the point if it was a specialist fertility Dr but a GP?! They're too busy to think if anything in their office might potentially offend a patient, on a case by case basis, depending on their ailment. YABVVU.

The GP may also have faced infertility issues as well. Just because they now have photos of their children doesn't mean you know how they 'got' those children.

Get a grip. That is all.

No we talking several school photos, photos of them on Disney holiday, camping etc. Also hand drawn pictures from the children annotated 'I love you daddy'.

Not just one on the desk or screen saver which would be a different matter. My friend said they were everywhere & her DIL was upset as she's worried she will never have a child to take to Disney or camping (even if she wanted to).

Understandably DIL is rather sensitive & very upset ATM.