To sometimes think that one boy and one girl, around three years apart is the only acceptable family setup?

[theotherdown]

Two of the same sex, two big an age gap, too small an age gap, more than two, only one, all prompt critical comments from somewhere.

Just in case I am accused of saying this is the only acceptable combination, my thread title means ‘the only setup that won’t invite critical comments.’

I have 5 girls so you can imagine the comments I get 😂

You do what you can manage in your circumstances. I have 2 boys with 5 year gap. DS1 was hyperactive as a toddler and I had no family nearby to help and I was tearing my hairs every day out of exhaustion and frustration. There was no way I would have been able to manage another baby/toddler with him being little. Now they are 5 and 10 and it's fine, apart from occiasional fights (DS2 is stubborn and quite boisterous).

That does seem to be the agreed ideal here too, with a girl preferred first so you can be sure you definitely get one. The amount of negativity I've had about not having that combination has been ridiculous, and a really handy way of filtering out people who need to spend some time in therapy working through their own issues.

This is really interesting to hear... Some similarities with my situation. i 100% agree, we all do what we can manage under the circumstances and from the little you have shared here you sound very sensible