Why would this man ask my daughter to move out of his way?

[justactingmyshoesize]

I was in a supermarket with my 10 year old dd and we walked over to the reduced fridge and I asked dd if she could see anything in there she fancied so she went over to have a look and a man walked over and looked at my daughter looking and said excuse me and expected her to move aside so he could look, she looked uncomfortable and stepped aside.

I said quite politely I think my daughter was just looking first but he ignored me and so I said quite loudly to my daughter “ you didn’t need to move out of his way as you were there first and so could continue looking but the man didn’t allow her space to until he had finished looking. It was as if my daughter was of no consequence at all.
I explained to my daughter she didn’t need to move out of his way but in the situation he didn’t give her a lot of choice.

But she wasn't getting something out of the fridge, she was just standing in front of it. If I wanted something out of the fridge and someone was just standing there, I'd say excuse me too, man, woman or child

Lol. I ask people to excuse me everytime I go shopping. I also move quickly if someone says excuse me to me. Its polite abd considerate. Don't look for slights where they dont exist- save your outrage for the real stuff otherwise you'll be permanently angry.

He didn’t even take anything from the fridge he just stood there and looked to see what there was the same as she wanted to.

I can’t see an issue here. Often people loiter in front of a shelf for ages trying to make a decision (I do it myself!). If I’m behind them I’ll wait for a few seconds and then say “excuse me” so that I can take something myself.

I remember really noticing this as a young girl - standing in queues at a counter waiting my turn in a shop and being ignored because I wasn't an adult and therefore didn't matter. I always vowed I would never treat children and young people that way when I became the adult. It is a thing, OP, and it comes from the same patriarchal place as all of the rest of it. YANBU.

I don't think he would have acted differently if it was a 10 year old boy, it was a child in his way and he politely asked them to excuse him. I suspect most people would do the same, you could wait forever for a child to move if they were just standing there waiting for a parent. I've had children in front of me in a queue but they are not really in the queue they were just standing where the queue was without realising, eventually ask if they are in the queue and they wander off.

Of course he would. A man just wouldn’t be making a broadway production of it on MN.

I doubt she was getting meat 😂yoghurt, smoothies, etc etc...you think a ten year old can't comprehend them?

I mean, if there was a kid standing where I wanted to look I’d say excuse me too. What’s the problem?

If he had asked her to move out of his way , like you said in the title , more people would have sided with you .

But he didn't . He said excuse me to a child who most would assume was just looking . You were exaggerating .

Have you raised a ten year old who can't take something off a shelf?
Many children much younger are capable of this. You have no right to assume they are just time-wasting and must move aside so you can carry out your very important grocery mission. Is it so hard to wait your fucking turn?

This is really tough

Some people are bullies

Some people think the rest of the world revolves around their kids

Perhaps you could just pick an explanation that makes you feel better and move on ?

Cool, enjoy rolling over for the whole world so you never make a fuss about anything.

You're not more important, and she is currently looking?
You can wait your fucking turn?

He only said excuse me. Your DD should have moved over a bit so they could both browse. It's a supermarket, it's not usual for one person to stand over a fridge by themselves for any length of time. Even a little single door fridge, two people can look. If she was actively reaching for something, then he should wait.

It would be fairly natural to assume a small child looking is not doing the actual shopping, and could just be looking. He was actually doing the shopping. I don't think he was doing anything much out of line, frankly.

I’d love to see a man asking another man to excuse him at the reduced items fridge at my local Tesco.

Even I can't comprehend some of the stuff in the reduced section! 😂 There's some very strange things in there at times.

Complete non event....he said excuse me - and nothing to do with him being a man despite some poster's attempts to make it out to be, as is typical of MN .. its just an adult shopper . Where on earth is this shop where you form an orderly queue to individually peruse the reduced items. Its a total bun fight in most places and every man, woman and occasional child for themselves and he was likely saying excuse me so he could actually open the fridge door. Any one would think he snatched the last available copy of Tween Weekly from her tiny hand

He probably didn’t want to get to close to her - for obvious reasons so asked her to move. Usually people just barge into you with their trolleys or baskets so better than that I suppose.

Don't be so silly and confrontational. Two people can look at the same fridge providing the first person takes a step to the side if politely asked to do so. Nothing wrong has happened.

😂

Weird post and some very weird responses! It's brought the staunch feminists out I see! The poor bloke said excuse me, he didn't pick her up answer drop kick her across the aisle fgs! He was being perfectly reasonable, misogynist my arse! 🙄
It doesn't take that long to look at reduced items in a fridge. And if he was in a hurry for some reason, I can totally see his annoyance. Especially when he did ask politely and then you started to make a big deal out of it! You were lucky he was polite enough not to have retorted to your weird rant! You come across as very entitled!
She's a child not an adult! Children are not equal to adults in this situation! And nor should they be! Unless the child is a carer, then children wouldn't be expected by most adult shoppers to be food shopping!
And I think a lot of people wouldn't expect a child to be blocking the reduced items area either! I'd have asked her to move too! It's bad enough dealing with slow shoppers and entire families, without a child blocking off a fridge other people, who are paying for their own shopping, are entitled to look at too!
You've made a complete mountain out of a molehill here. I think most of the comments show that clearly.

You sound very angry.

I would ask a man, or a child, or anyone really, if I could see that there would be room for both of us in the space or it looked like the person was daydreaming.