Am I too much ? Asking DH to do his business in the spare toilet

[funnypost]

This is a funny one. We have 3 and a half bathrooms in our house. 3 upstairs and 1 little bathroom downstairs.

upstairs there are 2 en suites- one off the master bedroom and one off the guest room, plus a family bathroom.

I loathe walking into a bathroom and it being smelly. I just can’t deal with it. It’s gross.

at weekends, DH tends to do his business in the master en suite. But this is where all our stuff is. I hate not being able to go up there or if I really need to, having to breathe in the disgusting smell.

so I’ve asked him, why can’t you just use one of the bathrooms that’s just completely not in use ? Why do you need to use the bathroom that’s most in use by me and also near our bedroom, which also makes the idea of it gross.

I would just never dream of doing it. I try to be discreet and use one of the bathrooms that’s not got all our stuff in.

men just don’t think like this right ? My DH thinks I’m ridiculous but also finds it funny and has complied.

what does everyone think ? Do I sound like I have a stick up my bum ? I just can’t stand it. I’m really funny about it and think all traces should be covered up. DH thinks I’m ridiculous and that it’s a normal thing in life and I’m way too uptight.

I don't think the practice of locating a lavatory in the main bathroom is entirely confined to the UK.

This is why toilets have lids. Put the lid down then flush. No issue. Toothbrushes will be unharmed.

Yes, that is what I do when staying away. At home it is a separate room (plus we can still use the lid). It makes people organisation easier in one bathroom homes.

In my country it is a building regulations requirement for homes bigger than 1 bed that there has to be a toilet as a separate room which can't open directly into living areas, two doors separation is required.
However, you can have "additional toilet" and "additional bathroom" on top of the regulatory one anywhere you wish.

They are two of them with a 3 bathroom house - not sure that applies in this case…

It isn't. I have relatives living in Italy and they have toilets in bathrooms. I've been in the house of locals in Greece and their toilet was in the bathroom.

On the other hand, I have lived in four different houses in the UK. Only one of them didn't have a toilet separate to the bathroom.

I think a toilet in a room on its own doesn't make sense, you surely need a basin to wash your hands after? We had a separate toilet from the bathroom and put a tiny hand basin in it

Honestly, and I don’t know if this makes me the weird one or not, I know if I need a poo or not before I go to the toilet? They don’t really sneak up on me.

No one is going to show any appreciation for my POOTSD comment ??really ? I was so proud !

Yes, where else should they be ?!

I did ! I added a love emoji as the laughing one has mysteriously disappeared! I thought it was brilliant

And for what it’s worth I agree with you OP, a little consideration goes a long way . This is why I’m not a fan of en suites, I hate the smells and noises when I’m trying to enjoy a cup of tea in bed.

YABU.

YANBU

You have the facilities that he doesn't have to use a joint bathroom that may be needed by another in a short space of time.

"what happens if you had one" well then obviously it wouldn't be a request, but you have the facilities!

Neither myself or DH use the ensuite to poo.. its not a difficult change to implement, just go to that bathroom not this one.

😂😂👏👏👏😂😂

I’m the same as you id ask him to go elsewhere.

We have an ensuite and just use it to wee in. Poo goes in main bathroom away from our bedroom. Your DH is being inconsiderate.

Put your stuff in another bathroom and use the ensuite mostly at night.

Get some air freshner.

DH and I have agreed that he uses our downstairs loo when possible, he gets up much earlier than I do so it's sensible from the point of view of noise as well as smells

This. And we both use the lobby toilets for solids, ensuite for liquids when in hotels. The OP should also use a spare toilet, unless blessed with rose scented aromas.

Precious princess

Just leave a box of matches in there. Lighting a match immediately burns off the methane, so the smell is eliminated. Much better than using air fresheners, and quicker than just opening the window.

It’s the ‘old fashioned’ way.

Thank you! I find this beyond ridiculous.

OMG. Cannot be arsed literally and metaphorically with the amount of calculation to do a poo.

I get it might bother you but I think it’s a bit unfair to make him feel bad about it. If it bothers you that much why don’t you just not use the ensuite and move all your stuff to another bathroom and ban him from that bathroom? I don’t think it’s really fair to make someone feel bad about using a bathroom as a bathroom. If not, you can get that stuff you spray before you use to minimise the smell, could you suggest he does that and opened the window?

Can I just say its so lovely to read on MN about a husband supporting his wife and not being a total dick and that the wife feels comfortable enough to show her husband she's batshit crazy knowing he will accept it and do what he can to make her life easier.
Yes OP you are indeed bonkers and too much but who the fuck cares, your DH doesn't and he's the only one affected by your crazy so go give him a hug and be happy you are winning in life when it comes to finding the rare breed of decent man!