Family mocking partner’s speech - AIBU to be upset?

[PReggoDuck23]

Bit of a rant really. We’re on a UK break with my family, just a cottage thing in Wales. Me, OH, my parents, my sister and her fella. I’m 23 weeks pregnant and just feeling a bit raw anyway tbh.

So my OH’s got a bit of a speech thing. Not a full stammer but he struggles sometimes with certain words or says stuff wrong, mispronounces things a bit. I’m used to it now and usually know exactly what he means. He gets worse when he’s tired and it’s been a long few days. We’ve been walking loads and it’s not exactly relaxing.

Last night after dinner he was trying to tell a story and got stuck on a word. Tried like 3 times to say it and my dad and sister just started laughing and taking the piss. Doing voices and repeating it back to him all wrong. He tried to laugh it off but I could see he was gutted. I told them to pack it in and they were like oh calm down we’re only joking. Then my sister said I’m just hormonal.

This morning he said he had a migraine and stayed at the cottage. Might be true but also reckon he just didn’t fancy spending the day with them after last night. Can’t blame him.

I said something again to my mum and she just rolled her eyes and said he’s too sensitive and they’re only winding him up. But I don’t think it’s funny at all. I feel really protective of him and also just really sad he’s been made to feel like that. It’s meant to be a nice time away before baby comes and now it just feels crap.

AIBU to be upset? Should I have said more?

Your family are nasty.

The fact that they've mocked him will make him more self conscious and nervous and so more likely he'll stammer in front of them again. They behaved appallingly.

I think speak to your mother again - tell her you can both take a joke but this is too much. Your partner has a small physical problem and your father and sister are bullying him whereas, as family, they should be making him feel comfortable and unselfconscious about it. If she still protests, I'd say if they don't knock it on the head you won't be able to spend as much time with them as you'd like in the future, which would be a real shame. They're your family, OP, so you need to be the one to spell it out to them.

Your poor DH what wankers they are OP.

This.

I was taught as a child that it's extremely rude and hurtful to treat people this way - because it is. People who do this are showing themselves to be pretty shabby human beings.

First post nails it

Your family sound incredibly low class OP. Very ignorant and ill educated. I’d be so embarrassed if my family were like that. Deeply embarrassed.

show them this thread and what everyone thinks of their behaviour.

I agree with others, your family has been very nasty to your partner without any need for it. I would pack up as soon as possible, if they don't change their attitude and it does not look like they will as they were making digs since the start of the break.

Making fun of someone with a stammer is cruel.
I wonder how your family would feel if someone made fun of something they were conscious of and laugh about it, I'm guessing not.

I'd of left tbh.

Your family is bullying your partner and the father of your child right in front of you. You need to deal with this and shut that bullshit down hard.

They're the kind of people who bully people with a disability, in his case, a speech impediment that affects his fluency. Stress, like being bullied, can make that worse. They're deliberately baiting him and enjoying it. That's not funny or banter, that's sadism.

I'd make it clear that was nasty and uncalled for and leave immediately and block their asshole selves.

Tbh I think you need to stop putting this back on him too OP. He can't be the one asking you to make a stand against your family and leave the holiday, you need to make a stand and make the decision yourself if you think that's the right thing to do. And if you love him you know it's the right thing to do. The poor man has been putting up with these jabs from your family for the length of your relationship it seems like, and he obviously loves you very much as he doesn't seem to have complained to you or asked you to back him.

Your family is horrible

I wouldn't walk out of the holiday, as that might make your partner feel worse (check with him though)

However I would go deliberately and obviously LC with them after the holiday

Tell your partner how sorry you are that your family is disgusting

As it’s your family I think it’s on you to say clearly it’s unacceptable, he is being loving and not creating a fracture, being his kind self, you need to stand for him. Tell the family their nasty behaviour needs to stop. Ask them why they feel they need to belittle someone? Why are they so insecure they need to bully someone?

I’d answer by taking the piss out of each one of your family in the most personal, horrible way you can - I’m sure they have multiple things ‘wrong’ with them in addition to being absolute pieces of shit.

You need to stand hard in front, behind and to the side of your partner and the father of your child. I'd bet my bottom dollar he's also better educated than them.

Pack and leave tomorrow

They are just vile.

Once you've packed up your car first thing in the morning, slash the tyres on their car(s) and smash all their windows, just before you leave.

When they discover it and get angry, tell them it was just a joke and they're pathetic for being so oversensitive.

<obviously don't actually do this... but how tempting>

i would have packed up and left.
Your family are bullies.

You're doing the right thing OP. Laughing at someone's speech (or the way they look etc) is just mean and nasty.

You probably are going to have to address it with them at some point though...soon enough your child will be aware of what's going on and copying everything. Can you imagine them going into nursery and saying similar comments to a child with a stutter or heavy accent. And thinking their dad is someone to be ridiculed

I rarely think that it would be a good idea for a poster to show their family/partner/friend a thread about them, but I'm beginning to think OP should send them a link.

Disgusting behaviour. Imagine them doing the same in front of your child in years to come, humiliating and embarrassing their dad.

Just go home tonight. His speech, or any other things people have, get worse with tiredness stress etc. will have caused the migraine too, I don’t have a speech impediment but with a migraine I can’t even get a sentence out around the correct way or say the wrong words for things.

And yes they are nasty bullies, he doesn’t deserve that .

I think you also need to know that your family’s behaviour and their reaction to you calling them in it is about CONTROL. They are pering on a lamppost, frankly - their view of what is funny / harmless banter / hormonal / overly sensitive is what counts, not yours or your OH’s. My guess is that they have exhibited controlling behaviour throughout your life. You have a chance to step out of it, now.

God they are nasty. I'd rather have a speech impediment than be a thick, ignorant arsehole.

And yes once it all calms down show your OH this post, we are all supporting him.

Poor him with in laws like that he will never be able to relax around them or want to see them.

They are being cruel and thoughtless. I wouldn’t go on holiday with them again. Support your husband; this is so upsetting