AIBU- pulling someone up on snarky comments.

[Guttyyyyyyyyy]

So I work and DH is retired. We have a dog. I work 4 days a week . On the days I work DH walks the dog in the morning and I walk it in the evening. My days off we swap it around.
There is a group of dog walkers that meet in the morning. One man thinks its hilarious to ask if Ive enjoyed my sleep in/ lazy day/ sending DH out while I relax ect.
every single time I see him. 2 years of me just ignoring him / saying I work ect.
I work in a unit that deals with palliative care. Yesterday was a bloody hard day.
So this morning he said it must be nice to laze about on a Sunday and send DH out so I let him have it with both barrels - told him ( in rough terms) what my day consisted of. That I was up and out by 6am. Long drive. The realities of my job.
He was silent. Got home and his wife has watsapped to say Ive upset him !@@.
AIBU to think he deserves it.

ODFOD

He deserved it

Oh Yes. Absolutely.

If I was in your shoes OP and even if I was not working in Palliative care but just we both fancied an alternant lie in , this would absolutely boil my piss. Stupid fucking man. The shit they think they should aim at women. It is not like they get gold stars for their stupid utterances!

Absolutely agree about menopausal rage! I always want to tell younger women - the things that annoy you in your partner when you’re pre-menstrual, make sure you pay attention to your anger and address the problems. Don’t just blame PMT and put up with it, or once you hit menopause you will find that same shit enraging every single day.

Basically, always pay attention to what your anger is telling you, it’s where your power lies.

OP you did the right thing, the man is a misogynistic dick and why should you put up with it.

In response you should say : (wife name) Thank you so much for the #BeKind your DH's constant belittling and bullying remarks have indeed become too much so it is really nice of you to reiterate this point to him

I’d reply how about don’t make sexist, illinformed jokes for 2 years then run home blubbing to mommy when you’re finally pulled up on your twattish juvenile behaviour.

But I’m a burn bridges kinda gal and my menopausal rage knows no fucks now.

The poor diddums, having to deal with the consequences of his own actions.

Frankly, after a difficult day on a palliative care setting, I think he was lucky you didn’t strangle him with your dog lead.

I'm gobsmacked that a grown man would run back to his mummy wife and say he was upset by your reaction. He obviously didn't give her the full story. And wth is she thinking by messaging the group?!?! urgh..so pathetic. 😑

Good on you for saying something to him, also how cringe is it that he has to get his wife to “stand up for him” on a WhatsApp group.

They both sound insufferable. I think it's amazing that you managed to hold it in for 2 years! He absolutely deserved and is clearly a misogynistic prat.

And as for #bekind, urgh! Seems to be the modern response for trying to shut people down because they've said something that calls them out.

DH has just pointed out that at least we probably wont see Annoying Fucker for the next few weeks.

Its a group that meets near a beach so the dogs can go off lead and socialise. Hence the watsapp group to co ordinate.
Most of us have been going for years.

Oh here we go again, more bullshit posts trying to make out OP is in the wrong here.
@Guttyyyyyyyyy ignore! Some posters obviously have nothing better to do.

Yay for this chap!!

I wouldn’t have held it in for as long as you did OP. He absolutely deserved it. And as for his wife messaging to say you’ve upset him, l’d be messaging back to her with both barrels in the same vein. He’s a misogynistic, passive aggressive shitbag and clearly his wife enables the behaviour. Well done - you can now enjoy your dog walks without the irritating and snide comments.

Why?
There are more than enough ideas on this thread and I'm sure we can be more "blunt" if that's what OP wants.
We don't have to outsource all our thinking to robots!

OP - good on that friend in the whatsapp!

I was trying to think of an appropriate response but you beat me to it. Some people are nuts

Totally agree.

This is a more moderate and sensible reply than perhaps what I would put, so go with this

Any woman with even a smidgen of cop on would know it was HIGHLY LIKELY that he had been an irritating twat and you had finally bitten.

It sounds like they are a pair of twats.
Blank them both going forward and growl if they approach.😁

I appreciate it’s harder if you are ND. Assuming he isn’t then there is no way after 2 years he hasn’t picked up on non verbal cues such as tone and body language that op’s not enjoying the “banter” even if she has just been saying “I’ve been at work not lying in” (not that there should be a comment or issue if she was lying in every time).

Equally, it was hardly losing it. It was just telling him exactly what she had been doing whilst he was “joking” she was lying in. His response says a lot too. He hasn’t thought “wow that response came out of nowhere. I hope she’s ok and I haven’t been upseting her for the last 2 years”. It’s be “woe is me” and releasing the “flying monkeys”.

Because she's his wife?

Well done!

Oh FFS. This is all about you, all the "ifs".

The OP properly served the annoying man who has had TWO years to think about what a twat he is.

He sounds like a total arsehole, in fact he is one, because anyone who runs home to tell on you is just an immature baby and basically a dickhead! I feel your rage and empathise. The wife must be a saint.

“…his #bekind human shield wife” is brilliant! @Screamingabdabz

@Guttyyyyyyyyy he deserved it.