Cleaner threw away/moved/stole my secret booze stash

[Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected]

I rarely drink, I haven’t since Dv was born and since Peri kicked in and made me ill, every time I did.
Things have been stressful recently and Ive been having the odd drink on the balcony at sunset on my own. I usually don’t drink it all and usually put the remainder behind my bedroom patio shutters outside

Anyway, I came to have some tonight and they’ve all gone, cleaners came yesterday so an assuming it’s them as they clean the patio area too

Why would they do that?

I think your dislike of your Dads drinking has given you disordered thinking around drinking in the house and around your DD

But you do have drink in the house, and you do just hide it....

That my Dd can see/find no

You’re drinking in a classic alcoholic fashion. And regardless of whether you admit it, you know that. Get help.

Op, absolutely nobody who doesn’t have problems with alcohol has a “secret booze stash”, hidden outside their house.

Maybe he polished them off. You need to ask him before you fire the cleaner.

In what way? It’s possible…I vowed never to be drunk in front of her, she has seen me with a ass of champagne on occasions at friends parties etc, but doesn’t notice. There’s a difference between this and my dad taking a bottle of red wine upstairs most nights when I was younger. She has seen me a dh socially and not lots. I don’t know, i’m not keen on her seeing me just sat at home drinking, probably is a bit weird

What is it you are drinking?
Surely your child has no idea what it is so why hide it?

Because there is nothing wrong with having a small cider in the house every now and then putting it outside is making it something shameful and I think you see it that way.

It’s to hide from Dd, ive said this. Pre Dd we just had wine/beer in the fridge like normal people. Its also because I sit up there, so Dh doesn’t pinch it etc

I wouldn’t fire her, just curious why she possibly might do this

It’s only small Somersby

If you're really not keen on her seeing you sitting drinking at home then just don't do it....

I don’t think the cleaner would have stolen it. So either they binned it thinking it was rubbish left outside (I would!) or someone else binned it or drank it. Put it somewhere more sensible next time, like the kitchen.

Surely you are making an issue of drinking alcohol by hiding it. You need to normalise it otherwise your child will possibly see it as something forbidden and may be more inclined to binge/keep it a secret from you in the future if they were drinking themselves. You are best to be open about it. Have a glass of wine with dinner. Show them that it is fine in moderation. Same with sweets, fast food and so on.

Anyway in regards to where the hidden stash has gone, I am guessing the bin as you left it looking untidy so it was thrown away.

Yes maybe, I just don’t want her childhood to be seeing me or dh drinking and definitely not drunk

Yes exactly so why are you hiding it? That is where the disordered thinking comes in because it can’t both be a small harmless bottle of cider and something you need to hide from her as a secret or something back.

I agree it is just a small cider and one that can be drunk inside

For context op, I barely drink. For me thateans I had half a glass of wine last week, around a month before that I had a bottle of pear cider in the garden in the nice weather, before that it was Christmas. It's not barely drinking to drink alone at night when the baby is in bed and hide the evidence while convincing yourself it is hardly drinking. Especially when you have a family history of covert alcoholism.

People who don't have a problem with alcohol have it inside the house, not hidden on the patio. You're being weird OP.

Have you asked your DP? That would seem to be the logical thing to do, especially as you say you have nothing to hide.

How old is your child and how often is not that often? How many times in the past month, fortnight, week?

It’s only recently, before that I drank less than you have just written, had nothing at Christmas etc. The warmer weather is here, it’s the end of the day, I reallsed it isnt making me feel ill anymore

Because it looked like discarded old drinks. One half empty but one full small bottle of cider, tucked away and forgotten about on the balcony and clearly rubbish. No wonder the cleaner just cleared them out.

That's what anyone would think because hiding small cider bottles outside on your balcony is just fucking odd and not what people do.

You have significant issues with alcohol op and extremely disordered thinking about it. Your actions aren't normal. Stop drinking entirely and get therapy.

Don't think it helps criticising OP.

@Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected just keep it in the fridge, let DP know you want the occasional drink and ask cleaner not to touch bottles as you'll deal with glass (plastic?) yourself

How often in the past month.

How many times this week?