Is drink driving ever right?!

[Lillylight]

Obviously the answer is a resounding NO! I know that. Everyone knows that…..right?

So how do I process/deal with my DH after he decided to drink and drive and just about manage to park on our drive?

In-laws response: Sweep it under the carpet.

DH’s response: It was just a mistake, I didn’t get caught so let’s not discuss it anymore or more accurately AT ALL.

Me: On OUR holiday alone as he missed the flight due to sleeping it off.

Why didn't you wake him up and you drive to the airport or whatever? Crikey, the women on here who don't know how to manage men - or pick impossible ones.

Because it’s not her job to manage a man? He is an adult. If he chose to go out, get drunk, drive home and miss a flight, that’s on him. Not her.

WWID?

Give him the bollocking of a lifetime and refuse to be driven by him until he had acknowledged what he’d done, apologised sincerely and undertaken never to do it again.

If he did, I’d be confiscating his car keys and selling the car.

Thank you. And I agree. The 'turned up four hours later' stories are news because they are so rare, too.

Manage men??

WTF?

I would’ve been disgusted with him, not wanted to holiday with him. Not fucking woke the prince up and driven him to the airport!

You need to raise your bar and not manage “men”.

Am I my brother's keeper? I think we all know the answer to that one.

@Lillylight is he flying out to join you, assuming you want him to, or has zero effort been made to un-ruin the holiday as well?

I am sorry for your loss, and glad they turned up for you.

I have a friend who works in a care home (disabilities, not elderly) and it was 3 and a half hours after she called to report an emergency, fairly recently).

This is what I would do. It’s pretty much my only red line in my relationships.

PP’s friend who drove drunk to get her own child to the hospital, might seem like something that’s ok, but it is putting other lives at risk. A call to 999 or the local police would have been the answer, but having lived in the arse end of nowhere for half my life, the rule was there was always a parent sober in the house.

Why didn’t they move your car?

I was in this same position, blocked in by a party guest who turned up after me. I was sober, he was drunk. He was about to move his car so I could get out, I told him to give me his keys and I would move it, he argued a lot, I told him if he got in the car I would call the police.

Every drunk driver has a “I did it but……” story.

Terrifying that a few posters think there are some occasions when it would be OK to drink drive.
Even a life threatening emergency isn't an excuse, you could turn that into killing someone else on the road, bizarre.

Definitely not. Although, I was secretly glad when my ex got caught for the second time 😜 I bought a brand new car on finance for me and my ex-husband only we split up 6 months later. Anyway, I can’t drive for medical reasons so he took the car and said he’d make the payments plus pay maintenance. After a few months, he said he couldn’t afford both so I was making the car repayments from my maintenance whilst he drove my car around with his new girlfriend in it.

Anyway, a year went by and he totals the car whilst drunk. The insurance paid out in full so no more repayments 🙌 The cherry on the top was seeing him looking pathetic in court as he got an 18 month ban and a fine 😜

Still not condoning drink driving though.

In our very real life, absolute emergency the nearest available ambulance was the other end of the county. All the others were tied up with equally desperate emergencies, there isn't an endless supply of them waiting, just in case. In our case the delay added to DH's catastrophic outcome.

Bloody hell, he sounds out of control, and it sounds like this isn't a one off. I'd be filing for divorce in this situation. If you have kids, I'd also be applying for a PSO to prevent him having the kids unsupervised. FWIW, I did exactly this with my XH (not because he was drink driving - I didn't find that bit out til the end or I would have filed earlier - but because of the alcoholism): I filed for divorce and then applied for a PSO. Judge granted a PSO for no unsupervised contact and ordered a CAO at the same time, not allowing XH to have the DC overnight at all.

Drink driving is illegal, immoral and puts innocent people at risk. No one forced your husband to drink and then start driving. It's all down to him.

Your call what you do going forward, but how many more times will his drinking ruin things for you (and potentially other people)? You do realise that he has to be the one to want to stop the problem drinking and start acting sensibly....there is nothing that you can say or do to try and change things. He seems to have parents that don't regard this as a problem. My ILs were furious with XH and disgusted with his behaviour, and they supported me/DC. You can't change his behaviour/actions, but you can choose what to do for yourself/your family in the circumstances.

He couldn't do it. Didn't know how to reverse park.

I am sorry, and shocked, to hear that. The spending restrictions of the last government have made the NHS difficult to run properly - I think that was the intention.

Car-parking, across the universe, always going forwards, we still can't find...wtf

...wow, I'm glad she has your sympathy!

I'm not sure I understand this post!

Apologies, I overshot into obscurity with one, a play on a pop song from when I was a small child that never left me! They went across the universe, always going forwards, cos they still can't find reverse... "

Ah! Silly me, I so should've known it were that 😆😊

I knew what you meant!

I've never seen Star Trek (missed out on a cultural phenomenon there haven't I?) ....

I am watching it now 😂😂I am going to think of it now every time I see the 'I can't reverse park' guy.