I just don't have enough money

[36912aceg]

Me and my husband are really struggling with money at the moment for the first time in our whole lives.

We have been together pretty much all of our adult lives.
We were on one income for nearly 10 years while I was a sahm, in all that time we never once had any worry about paying our bills and even managed to save 15k for a house deposit (first in our whole family to buy a house, took years of hard saving to try to get us out of renting)

Now I have had a job for the past 2 years so our money should have increased but its felt even tighter due to prices of everything increasing, of course our children are getting older too so we are feeding them more and other expenses such as bus fair etc is cropping up.

I started taking in ironing and cleaning as new way of making a bit of money on the side as things are getting tight. I made £85 this month on the side and this is the first time in our entire lives that we have struggled to pay the mortgage.
Thankfully we have always had a couple of hundred in savings which we dipped into for this months mortgage payment.

we shop second hand and cook from scratch, I follow all the tips and tricks to save money (batch cooking, paying in cash etc ) I follow martin Lewis and save save save every penny and its just not enough.

I had to decline 2 party invitations for my children this month because I couldn't justify the cost of 2 cards, 2 sets of bus fair. didn't even think about the fiver to put in the card.

I just don't get it, we both work. I even made some money on the side this month and I had to say no to a child's birthday party for 2 of my children.

we don't even drive so I couldn't even save money that way.

I don't know why I'm posting a moany little rant but I'm so stressed, our savings have been depleted by bills despite us living even more modestly than when we were on 1 income. I just don't fucking get how I can get more money.

Is there a food pantry where you live you can join? you pay something like £5 for one weekly shop.

Make sure you have the cheapest suppliers in term of utilities and mobile phone.

Claim any benefit you are entitled to.

Ultimately you and your partner would need to work more hours or get a better paid job with guaranteed hours.

I would see if you could use a bike for majority of your journeys unless it’s a food shop, same with dc.

school offer cycle safety to children who can ride. Could you get TA work in a local schools? Especially as that fits with school hours and then cleaning on weekends?

She's missed out loads of stuff in her outgoings. She's not mentioned things like insurance or anything.

She's using Too Good To Go, which isn't actually that cheap really. Yes it's cheaper for the products, but not cheap - Our local bakery, for example, dies a bag of stuff worth around £10, for £4. Bargain.. except I can buy the same types of food from supermarket for £3 and they'd be exactly what I want/need, wouldn't end up with a pastry, 2 iced buns and a walnut slice in addition to the loaf of if bread I was really after.

Not using these apps would save money easily.

You need to work more. 20 hours is not much. Your kids are teenagers.

Sorry but you sound fairly delusional. You have barely worked during your adult life - so why are you surprised that your finances are tight. you both sound like you’re in unskilled work or on low salaries. £85 a month indicates you may need to increase your hours or find higher paying work.

Edited to delete as it posted twice

Have you considered childminding? As you were a SAHM so long I’m surmising you like kids and it would fit well with your own childcare commitments. Or at least, as currently you schoolrun is a limitation, could you help other families out with afterschool care/babysitting? Sorry your DP’s job has vanished but it’s good he’s up for starting over. Feels like you both need full time work going forward but might have to patch it together with more temping till then, especially him. If he’s been looking for a new job for 18 months, the strategy needs to change somehow. Know the market is grim but there will be more hours if he’s willing to widen the net.

Your husband needs to up his hours, get a bar job, weekend work to tide you over.

The issue is that he’s not earning enough, not col crisis etc. if his current role isn’t reliable in terms of hours he needs to look elsewhere urgently plus in the meantime look for a second job himself. If after a year your can’t secure enough work to sustain your family in a cheap location property wise look at relocating where there’s better work prospects

This isn't about cost of living, it's about the reality that very very few people can raise multiple children without anyone in the house working full-time.

Which has always been the case

I think you need to go through your incomings and outgoings in detail because things don’t add up

£200 per week is not £800 per month. It is £866.67 per month

Remember there are 52weeks in a year not 48

You need to work out how much your actual income is each month and what your actual outgoings are precisely then you know what you need to find each month either by reducing your outgoings or upping your income.

How much are you both spending on travel to actually get to work. I am presuming you are taking your own packed lunch
Any chance of both or either of you picking up a bike from FBMP and cycling to work to save money on bus fares
(Surely children travel for free on buses or get a heavily discounted rate)

Whilst you are supplementing your income with ironing, what is your dh doing about supplementing his income. I would be brainstorming what skills you have and looking at ways to earn money. Or looking around the house to see if there is anyway to make money from stuff you have or can your home raise some money. Is it near a city centre, commuter train station or an airport where you can rent out your driveway or residents parking spot etc

Going on UC might not give you cash, but if you are struggling and on a low income it could get you a discount on certain bills. Maybe school dinners for dc, foodbanks etc

What I would say is that your list of bills and your income don’t match what you are saying

I'd echo what others wrote - you both need to look for more hours. Get creative in what you are looking for.

Food - you haven't posted your food budget (unless I missed it?) but see if any meals can be cheaper jacket and beans type meals to help. And for the love of God get off 2good2go and onto Olio - the latter can help cut your bills, the former is just discounted but still pricey restaurant and cafe food.

You need to account for the costs of teenagers - shoes, clothes, school equipment, school trips, dinner money, £10 here and there to go out, pocket money, birthday presents, subs for anything they do out of school scouts/football/cricket etc. it's relentless.

Your pay is way too low. I look after dogs in my home for people who don't like kennels, and I earn £3000 a month easy. Could you do that?

Hi OP, I did a quick back of a fag packet Universal Credit calculation for you. Based on some of the figures you have for income earlier in the thread.

While I was doing that the thread leapt to 7 pages. So hopefully someone's already been along to say this...

But I think you'd be entitled to around £316 per month.

Based on:

Couple rate: 628.10
Eldest child: 339.09
Other child: 292.81 (I'm assuming 2 kids and the eldest born pre 2017 as you said teens)
Total: 1259.91

Then take your joint monthly wages of 2400 minus the 684 buffer and multiply by 0.55. That's 943.80.

Reduce the 1259.91 by 943.80, leaving a monthly entitlement of 316.11

Sorry if this is a bit intrusive. I know you said you were posting for a moan, not necessarily practical suggestions. But, in your position, I would definitely claim.

Why just him? OP only works 16 hours a week.

What does he do? Sadly it sounds like a skill which isn't valued.

That Bread and Butter Thing redistribute surplus food, and it's proper food not a bag full of pastries! For £8.50 you get a bag of fruit and veg, a bag of fridge stuff and a bag of cupboard stuff, although it varies a bit every week.

They go to different pick up points around the country once a week - see if there is one near you. You need to join (free), then they message you 2 days beforehand to see if you want bags that week. Then you go and pick it up. Someone can pick up on your behalf. It's not means tested, and you don't need a referral.

Do you mean your DH is on a zero hours contract? As he is working few hours right now can he pick up a side hustle or second PT job? Can you work more hours, maybe at the weekend or evenings?

That is what I had to do and I’m sure it’s not unusual. Between you, you just aren’t working enough.

What kind of job / sector does your DH work in?

Which area of the country do you live in? Just thinking of transport links to other regions seeing as you don't have cars. Could be that travelling an hour away could increase your income

i really feel for the OP here. She just wanted to vent. For reasons outside her control, prices have shot up, and they are getting less income. Because they were financially prudent and bought their home, they aren’t entitled to housing benefits. Meanwhile all the nosey ninnies on here want a detailed breakdown of her expenses etc

@36912aceg i feel you. Everything has gotten more expensive. I’ve just lost my job but entitled to very little as we have a mortgage and savings (which we built up just in case one of us lost our jobs)

I knew from post 1 that information would be sketchy at best from the op

and sure enough…