Ok yo become a Dad to a newborn at 57?

[WaterBed]

Apart from being desperate to crack the joke

“i really hope so - I only live at 55”

in all seriousness - I personally think it’s fine to be a Dad age 57 when your OH has a newborn. Any thoughts ?

average life expectancy for 57 year old man is 84 - so by then half the fathers would be dead. Not a great idea.

Yeah this. Already abdicating responsibility for the poor kid.

I don't understand the post.

What does "Ok yo become a Dad" mean?

And what does "i really hope so - I only live at 55" mean?

Depends entirely on your health and your ability to provide for mother and child if you were to pop your clogs before the child is able to support him or herself.

Mortgage paid off or mortgage insurance policy paid up.
Large amount in savings.
Life insurance for a large amount and very few exclusions.

Will made and in good order.

After that, it's up to the woman whether she wants to have a baby with you.
Obv there are situations like mail order brides that are unacceptable/ exploitative and should not happen.

@Flamingoknees I am nearly 62 and have a 16-year-old. It's fine. (DH is younger though).

I don’t think it is ideal. The chances of disability and autism increase with older fathers. Not that this is a reason to not have a child- of course disabled and autistic children are wonderful and loved by their families. But having a child with additional needs tends to make life quite a lot harder.

But I do realise it’s just the way things go sometimes. My best friend got her one and only chance to have a baby with a man in this age bracket and I totally understood her choice to have a baby with him. Their child is wonderful and adored. But the Dad is pretty tired! (And constantly mistaken for her grandfather.)

Seems to have worked out well for Simon Cowell.

I still don't get the 55 joke.

That was ivf

Hah I actually find that funny. 😁

It's not ideal but then many of us don't have kids in ideal.circumstances. I wouldn't plan it that way but if that's how it then just make the best of it.

Not up to us, it is up to God.

Get decent life insurance for the sake of your child. Plenty of people die in their 60s. My dad died at 67, your child would only be 10. Children are expensive until well into their 20s if you want to provide them with as many educational opportunities as possible.

My godfather became a first time dad in his 60s. He’s 80 now, pretty fit, and his son is at university and thriving - polite, sensible, seems well-balanced.

I think it depends what kind of a person you are, but it definitely can work.

Door numbers.

This is one of those situations were socio-Eco circumstances matter enormously.

55 year-old consultant Dad with a walloping great £2 million pension that he can take at any time and put his feet up.
Fine
55 year old Dad in any kind of manual or mid-level management role where he’s only gonna get a 30 grand a year pension and it’s probably gonna defer that for as long as possible, renting.

Not fine

I don’t think God has anything to do with dirty old men chasing younger women. Although it has been a thing since time began.

As the child of older parents, yes it’s far too old.
my parents were 38 and 48, which today is not unusual but in the 1970’s was practically geriatric. They were both dead before I was 25. And that’s the reason I had my kids in my late 20’s. They had both been in perfect health until suddenly they weren’t…
make sure you have excellent life insurance OP - my parents did at least leave me relatively wealthy.

This.

My stepdaughter finished up having to go to court in order for her child to inherit a percentage of the dad's pension.

I know a man who is late 60s with a three year old. Looks old too. He has a three year old. His grandchild is the same age as his daughter.

I do think its too old. I think about mid 40s is a good upper limit for both women and men regarding procreating.

I don’t imagine he does much parenting somehow. And of course vast wealth helps.

As a 57 year old woman, I think it’s madness to have a baby at this age. You’ll be almost 80 by the time they finish uni. You’ll be parenting a teenager at 70. You’re not old enough to be their grandparent, you’re old enough to be their great grandparent!

The delulu is strong when it comes to age for many. I’ve seen it many times on here. Posters convinced they look and seem 20 years younger than they are.

Actually I think this is the, erm, child-friendly version 😁
The adult joke is that the man has impregnated the woman next door.

We had DD when XH was 54.
20 years on I can advise it was a miserable misogynistic disaster.
(Only just divorced as he did all he could to stop me) No relationship with DD whatsoever.

HUGE mistake.

Depends on the 57 year old to be honest. My dad is 70 and still runs about after my kids… more than he did with his own kids. It’s not even always about taking care of yourself, I’ve seen fit and healthy people drop dead at 40 yet my former alcoholic, chain smoker dad who thinks instant mash counts as one of your 5 a day is fine. Sometimes it’s just luck. We could all drop dead at any time. While I do think being a 57 year old dad would present some unique challenges and is maybe a little bit selfish, there’s much worse things. My main concern would be that he may require care in the not too distant future, and then you’d be dealing with that plus a child… a lot of work.