Should I give my honest to God opinion or just keep quiet?

[Payets]

So my sister and I are very close. It’s the kind of relationship where I could say “you can’t out in that you look hideous”. There would be no fallout as it’s recognised it’s coming from a good place.

Anyway, she’s getting married and we are just very different. I’m more detail oriented and type A. Where is a little slap dash and low effort.

I would say I have good taste and friends often ask me to go furniture or clothes shopping with them.

Sister showed me her wedding invites and they were truly awful. I shared alternatives. Said they were a little dated. Offered my services re ribbon tying and wax seal applying. But sister was like “who gives a shit”. I can tell she is getting annoyed.

No word of a lie she had used a border not too dissimilar to the one I had attached. Her wedding is very much not cheap either!

Do I change the habit of a lifetime and allow her to make shit choices??

Im very aware it’s her wedding so will for say “and the end of the day it’s up to you, it’s your wedding”.

Anyone can use a glue gun to stick some lavender to a Blue Mountain Arts card.
I thought those wax seals were condoms.

If you're on here showing us how poor her taste is and how good yours is, why did you show us a style that you subsequently said you didn't really like? You sounded pretty invested we you said you'd help with the wax seals and ribbon tying.

"Warning: This vehicle is reversing. Beep. Warning: This vehicle is reversing. Beep."

One person's slapdash is another person's laidback. One person's "attention to detail" is another person's controlling.

You have a problem, and it isn't your poor sister's wedding invites.

If you're like this about a perfectly fine wedding invite that most people will just take the information from and then bin there is no way you'd be anywhere near the rest of my wedding planning. You'd get your 'shit' invite and then that would be it see you on the wedding day

Stop interfering! Pathetic first world problem

When she asked that, was there a choice of designs? Fine to say which of the choice you like best. Not fine to expect her to go with your opinion or to suggest other new things unless she asks you for other ideas. It sounds like you answered but want to go back to discussing it because you didn't like her response to your answer.

It's an invitation, it's not that important.

This!

Have an opinion about whether her fiance is abusive (if that was an issue) but these things should reflect her taste, not yours.

Sometimes appealing to the norm is more important e.g. job interviews. Otherwise leave well alone.

Honestly, I prefer her choice. Wax seal is lively but overdone. A friend had a wedding recently with all the bright colours of the alleged bad taste invite you posted and everyone commented.
Let her be slapdash and chilled. It's her wedding, her personality and a thousand times better than a bridezilla or a nervous breakdown.

Who cares about stuff like that, especially wax seals🤣

Any old invite will do, it's the marriage itself that counts. I can't even remember what my wedding invites looked like. They were very boring but did the job.

It sounds like your sister has her priorities right.

Is it possible that people consult your taste because they know that otherwise they'll have to suffer your scorn and barbed comments forever after? 🤔

She asked for your opinion and you were honest as you should be. However , she doesn’t agree with your view and so you should drop it now and let her do what she wants. If you push it further then yes it’s being controlling.
im sort of a type A too and yes type As can be viewed by others as domineering , we do it because we think we are saving situations from disaster/we are right but it’s good to realise that nobody is always right and in this situation? Her wedding her ultimate choice. Even if the invites aren’t to your taste, so what

That message said ‘which design do you like’ but it seems that instead of picking from the options given, you suggested something entirely different.

She’s told you she doesn’t give a shit about the wedding invites. I’m with her. Why people care what they look like is beyond me.

Give advice when asked, but follow her lead instead of ploughing a different path.

You’re really not ‘saving anyone from disaster’. They’re just going out in a dress you think doesn’t suit them.

This

Some of the comments on here are very unpleasant and to be honest quite shameful.

I prefer your sister’s design to yours, by far

hers is more fun, your s is a bit too “Amanda from Motherland” 😁

'Do I change the habit of a lifetime and allow her to make shit choices??'

It's this sentence that people are picking up on when they question your dynamic with your sister. It sounds like you give your honest opinion and she changes what she's doing or wearing to your suggestion. This time she's not doing that which has obviously thrown you.

You don't get to allow her or not allow her to do anything though. It doesn't matter if the whole world would agree that your choice of invite style is better.

She asked your opinion and you gave it. It doesn't mean she is now obliged to go with what you suggest. You might want to get used to that. Perhaps your sister is getting a bit more confident in her own choices - that's a good thing.

There were no wax seals or ribbons (or anything faffy at all really) on my wedding invites and everyone showed up and had a good time so 🤷‍♀️

I'm really interested OP, can you tell us some ways your sister is brutally honest with you? You seem very sure that you're the ultra stylish one that everyone turns to whilst she's 'slapdash'.

The floral border is fine. Literally no one cares. Its an invitation. You are over thinking

Yet she’s getting annoyed. Let her have ‘shit choices’ and keep quiet.

My sisters and I are very too honest with each other and have very different tastes. We might ask each others opinions but on something like this we would just bite our tongues and be supportive of each other’s choices.

It sounds very much like you feel that your sister should feel grateful for your input but it also sounds like she doesn’t want it this time.

Have fun dress shopping! Lucky sister getting to go with her own personal stylist!

She’s the youngest isn’t she?

The inviations with the colourful border look a bit gaudy, but the white wax seals look like condoms imho! Ultimately no-one really gives a shit...planning to attend the wedding is what they'll be thinking about: Transport, babysitters, what to wear etc.The invite will be going in the bin after the event.

Wedding invitation borders - on a scale of 'things that matter' score 0. Absolutely no one cares about the border on a wedding invitation, other than the bride and groom. It's simply not important enough to raise with your sister, regardless of the kind of relationship you have.

Do I change the habit of a lifetime and allow her to make shit choices??

How rude. And weirdly confident that your opinion on wedding invitations is better than hers. She can have her wedding invitation however she wants.

Also, it’s just a wedding invitation! Who cares. It’s not a shit choice, it’s an irrelevant one.

I hope you're going to be more positive about her choice of wedding dress than you have been about her perfectly acceptable invites.
It's not your wedding. It's not about you or your taste or your choices.