Why is Alice Evans Gruffudd homeless?

[Englishsummerblues]

Doesn’t she have any famous friends? Where has all her money gone? Does she have to live in L.A? It just all seems bizarre, just move somewhere cheaper.

She could have easily got work and started up again. Plenty of women do.

Did you not watch 101 Dalmatians? 😂

Unfortunately, the fact that psychologists have rejected the idea of parental alienation as a recognisable syndrome has been seized on by some to argue that parental alienation doesn't happen. It is not a syndrome with an accepted approach to diagnosis and a generally recognised treatment. However, it does happen and the psychological community recognises this. To quote Psychology Today, "The psychological community does not recognize parental alienation as a diagnosable condition. However, brainwashing a child to hate a parent does occur and is recognized by the courts (provided there’s robust evidence). Unfortunately, there are also instances of false allegations of alienation for custody or financial purposes."

It is true that the courts have to be careful when faced with allegations of parental alienation. Unfortunately, parents involved in battles over their children do make false allegations of all kinds - abuse, drug use, alcohol dependency and so on. This includes false allegations of parental alienation. In many cases, the court has to make a best guess from limited evidence. That is not the case here.

Ioan's long absences from the family home whilst he was working elsewhere may have contributed to the current situation, but the evidence that Alice set about alienating their daughters from him even before they separated is clear. The evidence of her continued attempts to prevent contact and disrupt any attempt to help the girls reconcile with their father is also clear.

Before Alice found out he had a new partner, she decided the reason he left was his family. Sent abusive messages to his parents and siblings. She couldn't possibly conceive of the idea that he left because he no longer wanted to be married to her (even after she had told him she didn't want to be with him, he was useless, a failure, that she was going to find a new daddy for the girls, all of which is on transcript. Ioan also admitted that she assaulted him by hitting him around the head with an implement).

Alice was going to abuse Ioan and anyone connected to him, even if he remained celibate for the rest of his life. She sent abusive harassing letters to his employers, to try get him sacked. She is absolutely dangerous.

I haven’t been following the details, but if she is abusive, as I see being repeatedly claimed, I feel so sorry for those girls. With such a troubled mother, their father should have prioritised their safety and happiness, not a new relationship. I say that as a parent with a terrible ex; it was difficult to leave him but probably even harder to live my life in a way that proved to our child and the court that I could provide the stability she needed, not him. With hurting, confused children, who are hearing bile about you from the other parent, you have to be patient, and not bring someone new into the mix quickly.

Yes it was his mum’s fault before it was Bianca’s fault. Not once has Alice considered that maybe it was her fault… her treatment of him throughout the relationship, her alcohol and substance abuse etc.

No it isn't. That was the conclusion of peer reviewed research.

I've simply stated the position and findings of the judicial system/experts. The gender bias against women in court is internationally recognised now and the UN and various other bodies have published reports into it recently.

Claims of parental alienation are rightly treated as a red flag now. I haven't said it never happens, I've merely relayed that the conclusion by the Government that most claims aren't genuine.

It's discredited.

Don't forget that he left her because he was gay. Then she found out about Bianca and immediately he wasn't gay but had been having an affair for 3 years.

Parental alienation syndrome is discredited. Parental alienation as something that sometimes happens is not.

This is what CAFCASS say on the subject:

'Alienating behaviours' | Cafcass

And no, an allegation of parental alienation is not a red flag in and of itself. It does not mean the person making the allegations is likely to be an abuser. They may be, and, even if they are not, they may have contributed to their estrangement in other ways, but it is a long way from being a definite red flag as you allege.

I can’t believe anyone would argue that no one ever tries to alienate their children against the other parent. It so obviously does happen.

Those poor little girls. It’s clear from the language using in transcripts they have had lots of therapy. The little one comforting older one.
They also don’t appear to have any contact with grandparents.
Gloria the nanny referenced was a grandmotherly older Hispanic lady who had been with family long term, she’s gone too.

The narrative on this thread would be so different if their sexes were reversed…

If a man was abusive towards his wife through their marriage, either verbally or physically and they broke up. They shared custody but the father kept keeping the children away from the mother and continued to harass her, her family and even contacted her employers to try to get her fired…so she lodged legal complaints and tried to get custody of the children-she realised he was alienated the children against her so attempted to get therapy for them … in the background she met someone else who supported her through this. Her ex husband found out and spitefully told the children their mother had moved on-he then started harassing the new man and mocking him online as he had an illness…

…there is no way a thread on the above would be saying the father was ‘troubled’ or talking about his mental health while berating the wife for moving on to a new relationship and calling her a ‘wimp’. Just no way.

But some posters seem to disbelieve that domestic abuse/coercive control can happen to a man

There is ample evidence of Alice taking action over years now to deliberately damage the girls relationship with their father. That isn't in question.

So, genuine question: what term would you give to a pattern of behaviours where one parent seeks to drive a wedge between the child and their other parent?

The term parental alienation may be wielded in an abusive way in some circumstances, absolutely. Just because someone claims they've been alienated that doesn't mean they have been, without clear evidence.

In this case there is reams of evidence. As well as reams of evidence of Ioan trying to remain in the lives of his daughters.

Whatever term is applied to it, it's abusive towards the ex partner and towards the children. And will have lifelong ramifications. Utterly devastating.

I'm thankful in some respects that this has played out in the courts. There is clear evidence of everything Ioan has done to provide for the children and every action he has taken to try remain in their lives.

They will be adults in a few short years. My heart breaks for the process they will go through psychologically when they are able to access factual evidence about what's happened to them. To realise that their mother has been abusing and isolating them, and that the dad they've been told hates them and is a danger to them has tried everything he possibly can to remain in their lives, will be catastrophic. Those poor girls.

One of the saddest transcripts I saw was Alice's daughter pleading with her to stop making everything about daddy, to stop being nasty about daddy, to stop talking about him constantly, and Alice responding 'if you don't take my side you can fck off. I've had enough of you. You can go off to the nanny's for the week'.

She is one of the most malignant, dangerous women I've ever encountered.

No one has said that.

I haven't commented on her specific case. My comments were about parental alienation as a discredited concept.

The concept of paternal alienation as a specific syndrome has been rejected, not parental alienation.

It is recognized that parental alienation can and does happen, and there is evidence (in her own recorded words) to support that is exactly what is happening in this specific case.

Parental alienation does happen and our Dad was still in the same house, at least until 2 of us were grown up and gone. He wasn't perfect but he wasn't abusive, it was a matter of "take my side or else" by our mother. On one occasion she slapped the face of my much younger sibling (7 at the time) because she was happily playing a game in the garden with Dad and forgotten Mum wasn't speaking to him so therefore she shouldn't either. Only one example.

It took until adulthood to really understand how warped all this was but the fallout continues, as I'm afraid it is likely to for the Gruffud girls.

I think that’s unfair. In this era of toxic masculinity, I don’t think that a man should be called a wimp for being the opposite. It’s a bit victim blamey also. The guy was in a really toxic and abusive relationship with a narc (in my opinion) for years. We’re quick enough to defend female victims of abuse & recognise the cycle they can stuck in. Ideally we’d give the same grace to male victims.

I’d not read the eldest’s application until now. Basically she was alleging abuse by dad and gf and it was totally dismissed by court.
They are picked up by dad from police station with a psychologist chaperone in tow.
Alice hasn’t sent leotard for younger one even though she knows she has a gymnastics lesson (presumably to paint him in bad light he didn’t take her to class or to try and force him to come to her house)
Instead he says we’ll go to mall for new leotard.
Teen says she can’t cope in mall and has panic attack and wants to sit alone in car.
He understandably says no, you need to stay in car with an adult.
They try lesson it’s a disaster as younger then apparently has panic attack.
Go to his flat as psychologist suggests to calm down but gf there as it’s her flat and girls run out of flat in great distress and are chased by dad and girlfriend. Nanny called and they are collected.
It’s clear from what she says that this huge drama filled existence is very much norm and dad saying things like calm down and no you need to stay with adult is not her normal parenting.
She also mentions dad paying for phones for her and sister so he’s clearly still funding things over and above maintenance payments now.
Hopefully eldest can go to college in a couple of years and see normal behaviour and start to question what she’s seen and been told. Mum appears to be trying to set her up for nepo modelling however they’ve done a few pap walks.

Cafcass are the last people to be quoting on this as it was concerns over Cafcass that prompted the review in the first place.

The Ministry for Justice report found Cafcass to have fundamental failings and they were forced to issue an apology. Their actions were found to have caused harm to children.

Parental alienation is the common usage as has been recognised in the various reports given that the terms are so frequently conflated. It's semantics.

Thankfully with the new landmark guidance abuse victims will now have greater protection. It was long overdue.

https://www.thebureauinvestigates.com/stories/2024-12-11/parental-alienation-argument-cannot-be-used-against-domestic-abuse-victims-say-judges

No it's now recognised that the terms have become so conflated that PA is the common usage and the review and subsequent guidance acknowledges this.

Men can of course be victims of domestic abuse.

However domestic abuse is a gendered crime and 96% of defendants at trial are male.

The guidance from the FJC is to not give PA legitimacy as a syndrome, and to consider it within the wider context of the specific case in which it is claimed.

It does not state that psychological manipulation by a parent to alienate the other parent does not happen and isn’t serious when it does. It also does not support dismissing claims of it outright.