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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Husband uses my towel!!

209 replies

ExhaustedPigeon37 · 13/05/2025 21:45

Exactly that!

Am I being unreasonable to think DH should use his own towel when showering/bathing?

We hang our towels on the back on the back of our bedroom door, my towel is usually pink or purple as I bought them for me and my daughter when we lived together, just us two, a girls house. DH’s towel is usually blue or green, from his house when he lived by himself!

I’m suffering tonight with cramps and back pain and it may be because it’s TOTM but DH had a shower and then came downstairs with my pink towel around his waist and it really annoyed me!! I’ve told him so many times to use his own towel. Tonight he just said in his nonchalant male tone “sorry I just grabbed the first one I saw!!”. He just doesn’t seem to get it. I only changed the towels this weekend and now he has used both of ours, so I’m going to have to get another clean towel tomorrow morning!

YABU - get yourself some chocolate and get over it he is your husband!

YANBU - he should be more understanding, send him out to get you chocolate!

OP posts:
dayslikethese1 · 14/05/2025 02:52

Surprised at the amount of ppl who all use the same towel😮I guess it's not a big deal but I prefer to keep mine to myself so I'm with you OP.

PoopingAllTheWay · 14/05/2025 02:53

We have different towels

Partner uses his more than once

I use fresh clean towels every time so no chance he would use mine but i know not to use his
Anyway, why would i want to use his towel, its horrid to be sharing towels

But we have different towels to dry hands too. So 😂

dottiedodah · 14/05/2025 04:12

It's just not on .pp saying don't see the issue. 1 you have made it clear you don't want to share your towel,he needs to respect that.2 it's unhygienic, our skin sheds all over towe.any skin irritation may be passed on .

RhaenysRocks · 14/05/2025 04:35

Delphiniumandlupins · 14/05/2025 01:47

I wonder if the men people who think it doesn't matter which towel they use would notice if they were left with a damp one?

But that's why you have a stack of them ..some of mine are older than my teenagers but they are all perfectly serviceable and in the bathroom cupboard so it's really not a problem to just grab another.

Valeriekat · 14/05/2025 04:47

Do people genuinely not understand why you would want a nice dry towel?
He isn’t listening to you.

thepariscrimefiles · 14/05/2025 04:48

Expensivecoffee · 13/05/2025 22:37

I wash mine after every use.
Clean towel every time i use one.

Show quote history

Is that just bath towels or hand towels as well? Surely if it's hand towels and you use a clean one every time you wash your hands, you must use loads of towels every day.

Valeriekat · 14/05/2025 04:49

Do people not have their own preferred towel? I prefer my magenta towels to my orange towels. I prefer my more expensive towels to my cheaper towels and I like them all to be very dry!

RhaenysRocks · 14/05/2025 04:50

AlmostLate · 13/05/2025 23:23

🤢 and pretty stupid.
Use clean towels ..

Show quote history

Why stupid? I think all the washing after one use, "yuk" comments and worrying about skin infections is a bit stupid unless you actually know someone has something. Equally, the comment about drying between your toes..do people actually sit there and methodically do that? By the time I'm putting my socks on my feet are air dried.

No wonder the stress levels and anxiety in adults is so bloody high if something as mundane and every day as a shower and a towel requires a routine, a laundry rota and health anxiety about accidentally getting skin cells on you from the person you sleep next to in bed.

Valeriekat · 14/05/2025 04:52

ItGhoul · 13/05/2025 22:54

I feel more sorry for him with every post

Show quote history

Women are allowed not to enjoy certain sex acts. How dare you criticize.

NaiceBalonz · 14/05/2025 05:31

Clownsy · 13/05/2025 21:58

Honestly OP I think this is him subtly telling you that he will do EXACTLY as he pleases and doesn't give a shit what you think.

Massive red flag that you have had him move in.

4 children here. All with different colour flags.
Of all the bickering over 25 years, not ONCE has there been an issue with their own towels.

They have enough cop on and courtesy towards each not to use someone else's towel.

I would be more pissed off by his persistent blatant disregard for a reasonable request than the act itself.

Not someone I would want around my child.
This is his mask slipping, you just haven't realised it yet.

Be warned.

What exactly is wrong with you?

Missanimosity · 14/05/2025 05:36

Clownsy · 13/05/2025 21:58

Honestly OP I think this is him subtly telling you that he will do EXACTLY as he pleases and doesn't give a shit what you think.

Massive red flag that you have had him move in.

4 children here. All with different colour flags.
Of all the bickering over 25 years, not ONCE has there been an issue with their own towels.

They have enough cop on and courtesy towards each not to use someone else's towel.

I would be more pissed off by his persistent blatant disregard for a reasonable request than the act itself.

Not someone I would want around my child.
This is his mask slipping, you just haven't realised it yet.

Be warned.

Fu*k me, all for a towel!!!

ChocolateCinderToffee · 14/05/2025 05:53

Love51 · 13/05/2025 22:26

Yeah that would be fine here too! Towels, money, credit cards, cars.
It was the same in the home I grew up in. I've never had any skin condition related to towel sharing and neither have any family members.

Show quote history

Well, no. But if one of you caught something, you would all get it.

Icreatedausernameyippee · 14/05/2025 05:58

I've only discovered in adulthood that I'm the one who isn't normal when it comes to towel usage.
I use my towel once and then I wash it.
My kids are the same.
My husband keeps his for about a week.
I have green towels, my husband has navy towels, son has teal towels dd1 has pink towels and dd2 has white.
There are some beige towels that are communal but they're used when there's nothing else available - otherwise we stick to our colours.
I would be really annoyed if my husband was using my towel. It's mine. For me. Even if it's going right in the wash after, it's just a matter of respect. I don't want his bollocks all over my towel.

Expensivecoffee · 14/05/2025 06:26

thepariscrimefiles · 14/05/2025 04:48

Is that just bath towels or hand towels as well? Surely if it's hand towels and you use a clean one every time you wash your hands, you must use loads of towels every day.

Show quote history

Just bath towels.
I live alone as well.

catsand · 14/05/2025 08:36

WhenICalledYouLastNightFromTesco · 14/05/2025 01:22

What about drying in-between your toes though, and other areas that need properly drying? Do you dry them on your robe?

Show quote history

I don’t think I have ever dried between my toes…

Original poster
ExhaustedPigeon37 · 14/05/2025 08:54

FatLarrysBanned · 13/05/2025 22:47

We share towels with gay abandon in this house. We also both sleep naked, have sex and don't change the sheets every day! 😱

We sleep naked too, have sex regularly sometimes more than once a day (TTC), but the towel things just gives me the ick and frustrates me! I don’t know why 😂😷

OP posts:
Original poster
ExhaustedPigeon37 · 14/05/2025 08:54

catsand · 14/05/2025 08:36

I don’t think I have ever dried between my toes…

Show quote history

Me either come to think of it! Apart from when I have a pedicure and the beautician does it for me!

OP posts:
Cynic17 · 14/05/2025 08:58

Big deal. It's just a bit of clean water.

notatinydancer · 14/05/2025 09:00

I agree , it’s not about him not being clean , it’s that your towel will probably still be wet when you want to use it.

Original poster
ExhaustedPigeon37 · 14/05/2025 09:00

Icreatedausernameyippee · 14/05/2025 05:58

I've only discovered in adulthood that I'm the one who isn't normal when it comes to towel usage.
I use my towel once and then I wash it.
My kids are the same.
My husband keeps his for about a week.
I have green towels, my husband has navy towels, son has teal towels dd1 has pink towels and dd2 has white.
There are some beige towels that are communal but they're used when there's nothing else available - otherwise we stick to our colours.
I would be really annoyed if my husband was using my towel. It's mine. For me. Even if it's going right in the wash after, it's just a matter of respect. I don't want his bollocks all over my towel.

DH would go spare if I washed the towels after each use, because of the amount of electricity. How often do you replace your towels with new ones? Don’t they go scratchy with all the washing?

I’m trying the colour coded towels, next step is towels with a letter on it so he knows that the ones with J on are his! Although we are both Dyslexic and J & K are next to each other in the alphabet so I can see that being the next excuse 😂😂😂

OP posts:
piehj · 14/05/2025 09:04

I don’t understand all these posts about women grossed out by their husbands (there are other ones) don’t get me wrong I wouldn’t share a toothbrush, but sharing a towel…I think the only reason that would annoy me was if it was recently damp when I wanted it, but then I’d just use the other dry one…my husband doesn’t gross me out.

JohnAmendAll · 14/05/2025 09:09

People have personal towels?

Well you live and learn.

TooGoodToGoto · 14/05/2025 09:12

Burn the towel, no other option!

kissmyfatass · 14/05/2025 09:15

We never use each others towels here. Everyone has a spot on the bathroom radiator.
the thought of DSS using my towel to dry his balls it arse crack makes me gag

ForZanyAquaViewer · 14/05/2025 09:23

I wouldn’t care about DH using my towel. However, I would care about him continuing to do something that he knows annoys me when I’ve asked him to stop.

That’s what I don’t get about these threads. It’s not humorous, it’s basically saying ‘I don’t give a shit what you want, I’m going to keep doing this thing’. I cannot imagine a situation, however minuscule, in which that would be my husband’s reaction to anything.

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