My son is changing.

[BarbBarb]

Hi everyone. my son is 22 and I have been noticing a lot of changes in his interests. my and DH were hoping he would go down the dependable sensible type. But he seems to be keen on the arts. He's been talking about starting a podcast with his friends and he's stopped cutting his hair and is getting a ridiculous mullet to go alongside a wispy mustache which looks so untidy. The other day he tried to show me a video of Ed Sheeran where Ed Sheeran was showing off all his tattoos. I am just worried that the artistic life is a struggle and certainly don't want him getting a Tattoo he used to be such a sensible boy. Am I over reacting?

It's like Viz for the middle-aged, isn't it.

Whereas it's natural to worry about our children, he's an adult now. 22. TWENTY TWO is the BEST time to grow your hair, get a stupid tattoo, start a podcast with your mates etc. He's finding out who he is, I hope he has a blast doing it. As long as he's not hurting himself or others, have at it.

Hear he speaks highly of you, too.

At 18, I had a belly button piercing, eyebrows pierced, crop top top style jumpers. Went to study and Arts degree. Shaved part of my head.

Now I am a mum and work in a sensible job 20 years later. Piercings all out, midriff covered up, blonde bob hair cut. No harm done? I don't really see what the problem is with anything you listed?

Lol

Mullets and moustaches are very in and have been for a long time. What exactly is not “sensible” about a hair cut or wearing his natural facial hair in a style he wants? Good grief he’s 22. The perfect time to be insensible.

BUT NOT THE ARTS!? I guess you would rather he forced himself into a nice job at the bank and silently grew depressed until he couldn’t feel feelings any more - like a sensible person. Give your head a wobble.

I think it must be. Surely no parent has said ‘he used to be such a sensible boy’ since 1952?

The mullet and 'tache are fashionable at the moment. I am glad I'm not a young woman right now as I find this look deeply unsexy, but the Gen Zers are all over it. He's having fun and exploring his identity, it's part of what university is about. Is he doing a 'sensible' degree? I didn't do a particularly sensible one (English and Art History) and I've always been employed. That said - I am definitely not rich!

Maybe he wants an entire life-size tattoo of Ed Sheeran on his torso?

My mum wisely kept quiet as I dyed my hair as a punk.

Although later on she admitted to worrying about "us kids" but then I reminded her that none of us were on drugs, heavy drinkers, coming home at all times, trouble with police so basically she had nothing to worry about, apart from how to get hair dye off pillowcases!!!

Ah he sounds just like my 21 year old DS but he has piercings as well and is doing a degree in something arty MN education boards would faint over. He is the most lovely boy and is so happy he can figure life out later.

Teenage lasts from about 14 to 25, especially with boys. Once he hits 26 he'll become as boring as the rest of us. In the meantime just ask him to please try not to accidentally procreate or have anything amputated.

Is this real? There is absolutely nothing in your post that would concern me with respect to my 21/22 year old son and daughter. My daughter has lots of tattoos/piercings (she is also an Oxford graduate). My son has a mullet-ish hairstyle and it often looks ridiculous to my mind, but that's up to him.

I'd only be concerned if he isn't currently working or in education and not taking any sensible steps to address that. But you don't say that in your post.

Thinking the same.

That would be classic. I reckon if he wants that I'd chip in to the crowdfunder for it!

Your son is 22...

He is an adult who can do whatever he wants with his life.

This is what I worry about unfortunately!

I was expecting much, much worse from your thread title.
Haven't you ever had a haircut worthy of ridicule?

Gives me hope for the future. Don't worry OP he won't need much money to live in the commune with his girlfriend "earth flower", and I'm sure they'll make enough from selling jewelry at festivals to keep them in organic tofu.. it'll be fine.🤣

I have caught him with some skunk a couple of times. sigh.

If it's any comfort, he probably thinks you look ridiculous too.

He is an adult, let him live his life how he wishes - you can’t stop him either way unfortunately. I’m 26 but would say this sounds cool!

What your son has are the early symptoms of becoming a hipster.

I'm afraid once he's on the pathway it's tricky to avoid developing further - you could perhaps try some doses of heavy metal music, and start to practise generalised misogyny around him to try and cement the idea of more traditional life choices -

But since he's reached the podcast threshold, it's likely he's unfortunately not able to be helped now. Don't worry though, most likely he'll become simultaneously very stylish and will be able to give you tips on how to keep your house plants alive and how to fix your bicycle.

That is no way to speak about your son's new girlfriend!

Seriously though, tell him to feed it sparingly (little but often) and make sure it gets at least 8 hours shut-eye a night.

I had to Google Ed Sheeran tattoos so I could form an opinion. I think he looks a little like a patchwork quilt.