My son is changing.

[BarbBarb]

Hi everyone. my son is 22 and I have been noticing a lot of changes in his interests. my and DH were hoping he would go down the dependable sensible type. But he seems to be keen on the arts. He's been talking about starting a podcast with his friends and he's stopped cutting his hair and is getting a ridiculous mullet to go alongside a wispy mustache which looks so untidy. The other day he tried to show me a video of Ed Sheeran where Ed Sheeran was showing off all his tattoos. I am just worried that the artistic life is a struggle and certainly don't want him getting a Tattoo he used to be such a sensible boy. Am I over reacting?

I'd be devastated if either of my sons liked Ed Sheeran.

Long as he’s a working member of society and not doing drugs - YABU. He’s 22, let the boy be an adult.

😂😂😂

My 22 year old is covered in tattoos - some self- done stick and poke when MH wasn't good aged 18, some professionally done (more recent times, thankfully).
Is doing an art-based degree which is going to get them absolutely nowhere job-wise but for their MH it's been amazing, even though academically they could've done a much more challenging course (art is challenging in a different way) and their are doing well because they are academic and know how to write essays and do the critique - the art itself I don't think is that amazing!
Hair - don't ask.
Is also non-binary, I have my opinions on that.
However, they eat really well, go to the gym and have good friends and we have an excellent relationship.
They are about to finish uni so it could be very interesting to see what being in the 'wide world' does for them and whether they have to conform a bit now.

Your son is simply being himself. Either love him unconditionally or be the mum who only loves their kids if they are ‘sensible’ (ie what they want them to be).

My advice - show interest when he shows you things, listen to him, laugh together, get to know this new version he’s exploring, be part of his world if he ever invites you into it and hopefully then you’ll get to have a wonderful relationship with he’s 30.

@EmmaWoodhouseOfHighbury I know, Ed is such a bad role model with his interest in the arts, it’s much preferable that they like proper men like Andrew Tate. 🙃

Not the subversive, counterculture, cult figure Ed Sheeran 😂
Presumably this is a joke post, although I don't get it. God forbid it isn't though, what on earth is wrong with The Arts?!
Podcasts are a low cost, potentially high success form of media and a great way for a younger person to flex their creative muscles. He could have a hit for the cost of a decent mic, but even if he doesn't he'll be developing research, communication and marketing skills. Depending on the content he might require legal and compliance knowledge. Plenty of us in the evil arts have jobs that involve creativity and a shit load of being sensible and dependable.

Yes, I can’t see a young Ed Sheeran enthusiast going too far off the straight and narrow

Why does what he looks like at this age matter to you

I'm guessing you are are at least 40. Most 40 yr old would look back at pictures of themselves 17-25 with a level of embarrassment. At the same time they'd be remembering the good times they were having back then.

Poor Ed, he’s a good egg.

OP we've all been there with the dreadful haircuts, wispy taches, straggly beards. All you can do is roll your eyes inwardly and be glad that he's young and adventurous and having fun, and that there'll be another haircut along soon. Honestly, if this is as far as you get tested you're a very lucky mother!

I might be more worried if he was doing this without success in his mid 30's. But right now he's learning about adulthood and you need to cut the apron strings.

Ahh but if you’d grown a moustache they would have!

With all due respect OP your son is 22. My son is 17 and growing a ridiculous moustache but I can’t stop him; it’s his body/his choice! I think you need to cut the apron strings and let your son be who he wants to be. This age is all about self discovery.

You will be telling us he listens to satanic music next 🤦🏻‍♀️

You must have seen the many many many young men sporting this kind of look though? Some of them even have professional jobs. It’s the fashion.

Maybe has strong opinions about his parents that wouldn’t sit well with you. Being sensible and dependable is often a coping mechanism of being scared. He sounds great

I know, young people are such dreadful sheep nowadays, worse than ever.

Chris Eubank Jr looked great a couple of weekends ago - at last a boxer with no tatts.

Is this real, or an AI/creative writing attempt??

My sons 16…. I leave him to decide on his facial hair and his haircuts. If he wants a tattoo- none of my business. I can’t imagine having an opinion on this now let alone at 22. Oh and he prob thinks your hairstyle looks awful too.

If he wants to get tattoos in the same style as Ed Sheeran then I'd say you've every right to be appalled.
But you can't control his facial hair or haircut or interests. He's a grown man.
I find it hard to believe you're not a wind up to be honest.

If he's into the arts, the main thing to ask is, is he talented? Does he work really hard at his chosen art?

It's his job to be young and do daft things he can look back on with a blend of nostalgia and embarrassment, surely?

I'm afraid I think this falls squarely under the heading of buying problems when they're giving them away for free.

Oh no, not that well known bad boy Ed Sheeran 😱

your son is not a boy he is a man. Its not as though he is saying he is trans or taking drugs.I suggest you back off or you might lose him