Things that don’t bother you that seem a big deal to other people

[Yesttte]

Lighthearted really but I honestly can’t understand why anyone would feel precious about a friend forgetting their birthday. My very best friend has forgot a couple of times and it’s more funny than anything else. But other people seem up in arms about things like this.

Weddings… I couldn’t give a shit if someone couldn’t make my wedding or posted a photo too soon or whatever else. I’m amazed people care about this stuff.

Obviously there’s plenty I’m highly strung about though! 😅

People parking on the public road outside my house.

Not bothered about-

Public speaking (as long as I’m prepared)
Valentines Day (Meh!)
Elf on the Shelf (Not in my house!)
A couple of dirty dishes (Nobody died!)
A bit of body hair on a woman (Who cares?)

Cars parked legally on the street outside my house
Workmen using the toilet
Friends dropping in without a prior arrangement
Taking in parcels for close neighbours
Helping out other parents with lifts or play dates
Asking other parents to help me out with lifts or or play dates / them saying no because it doesn’t suit them
DH being away for work or hobby
Friends not replying instantly to my messages
Teenage boys

Birthdays. I don't like a fuss, don't need anything so gifts are wasted on me.
Christmas gifts for adults other than immediate family.
I just really hate giving and receiving gifts. It's all so tedious 😆

I don't mind hearing neighbours enjoying themselves in the garden and even playing MUSIC!!

Weddings - totally dull and pointless. Sign a piece of paper and be done with it.

Celebrating adult birthdays. Who cares?

Posting photos on social media.

Going on holiday with extended family. Literally my idea of hell.

Getting upset at leaving your kids. I always made time for myself after having my kids and never felt guilty about leaving them with anyone else and definitely not upset. I went into early labour with twins and had cinema tickets for a film I really wanted to see on the day that they ended up being born, I went to see it two weeks later.

• Weddings. Never understood the disproportionate airtime they take up in people's lives. And all the bizarre etiquette and paraphernalia, the rings etc. Madness.

• Friends who fail to respond immediately to text/whatsapp messages: people have lives and you're not their boss. Chill out.

• The fetishisation of travel packing: I've never understood why people feel its necessary to pack for a holiday 3-4 days beforehand. I routinely have conversations with people who are going on holiday a week hence and will say: "I haven't even packed!". What are you going to do, pack and repack three times? Put some clean clothes in a suitcase, check you've got everything. It's not quantum physics.

I don't mind who poos in my toilet

Shoes on/shoes off - doesn't bother me

Of course a tradey can use the toilet

Farting - it's a natural bodily function and obviously a little decorum is needed but at home when a partner has seen his wife in labour?

Smoking - there are far worse addictions if people have nearly £20 for a pack of fags, let them puff providing they aren't hurting anyone else.

Mine are:
Not answering the door
Being outraged because DH will be away overnight
Washing uniform every day
People parking outside my house
Going NC over the slightest little thing
Being 'devastated' because partner didn't tell me happy birthday/happy Wednesday etc with a big elaborate social media post
The general MIL hostility on Mumsnet
Work sending me an email when I'm on annual leave (answer it or don't, seems straightforward to me)
The constant drama on mumsnet over general life stuff.
Emotional affairs

@EG94 missing the point of the thread but... what you start all work emails with "hi"? That just sounds unprofessional to me. Name only is almost universal in my world, just like "Dear x" is normal in a letter. It would never occur to me anyone might think it rude.

Back to the OP,

• people parking up outside school an hour before pickup to grab the parking spaces. I think it's daft, but it's their own time they're wasting.
• older kids in buggies. I find people who walk a lot use buggies for longer, and people who judge a lot are those who drive more and walk less.
• dummies on toddlers

@RosesAndHellebores

Farting - it's a natural bodily function and obviously a little decorum is needed but at home when a partner has seen his wife in labour?

God totally. You get posts on here from people proudly proclaiming they've been married 40 years and have never heard one another fart. Life must be excruciating.

Me neither!

Potholes

Sure, I'd rather have a smooth road, but they are really not a big deal if you have sensible tyres and stick to speed limits. They seem to consume so many people with complete anguish on a day to day basis.

On a related note, cars with enormous alloy rims and skinny tyres.

Thanks, I know, I cleared that up.

I just find it rude

Lucy

blah blah blah

how long does it take to put hi and greet someone

usually this is internal emails, my customers manage to greet me politely 🤷🏼‍♀️

I start my external emails with good day as my customers are around the world. Internal emails I start with hi.

but haven’t you just answered it yourself, letters starting with dear x. You greet the recipient ?

emotional affairs, IMO there’s no such thing. Obviously if you’re going down the talking sex route then that’s one thing, but confiding in someone of the opposite sex does not equal an emotional affair.

Shoes on/off, who cares.

Not being wished happy birthday
The need to go NC over the smallest slight. Just get over it.

Trans people, esp trans women in women’s toilets. There are cubicles, it’s not like you’re exposing yourself to a man.

Expensive cars.
Expensive hen does.
Fashion trends.

Kids making a bit of noise in the theatre or cinema. It's fine, I like to hear them enjoying themselves and if they're there it's going to be kid-friendly or specifically aimed at them, don't spoil their vibe. Noisy adults not so much...

actually talking to people rather than trying to conduct sensitive conversations by text or note through the door

Birthdays (except for kids)
Mother’s Day
Father’s Day
valentines day
whether my children are invited to weddings
general wedding palava
baby showers
hen dos
opening my front door
constant cleaning
travelling or doing anything solo
kids playing outside or out

although most of these only bother people on MN. Not in real life

Yes I have always wondered if I was missing something when people are outraged over trans women using the women's toilets.
It's also like the complaints about CCTV in toilets in schools/removing the door to the toilet block. It's not the cubicles the CCTV shows, more the groups that gather by the sinks!

Also...

• People getting the vapours about other people eating in the office due to the risk of it smelling. The idea that its rude or unseemly to consume food in public (other than in a restaurant) also strikes me as unbearably anal and fastidious. People going on about 'feeling sick' because someone is eating some non offensive food at their desk. Such an overreaction. Fine, I get that microwaved fish is a problem. But some people are so melodramatic about this.

Not bothered about having my house ‘visitor-ready”

I never regarded the school run as some form of ordeal, and even when I was doing it at an insular village school where no one spoke to me, I still didn’t think everyone was horrible and ‘cliquish’

I answer the door regardless of whether I’m expecting someone or not

I don’t feel my friends owe me a certain level of contact — if they withdraw temporarily, I assume they needed it, and don’t see it as some form of insult

I don’t know when any of my friends’ children’s birthdays are and I’m not bothered whether anyone other than immediate family remembers mine. Same for anniversaries

Tradesmen using my toilet or having a cup of tea (no coffee in my house).

Children not wanting to wear a coat in winter- it’s the U.K., they’ll feel cold and learn their lesson. They won’t freeze