Stay at home parent looking forward to retirement

[Equalitystreets]

One partner is and has always been the sole breadwinner.

Other is a stay at home parent who as the children have gotten older has gradually had more free time during the day.

They always share the household chores equally.

When the children go to University, the stay at home parent has said they will be retiring and ‘they can’t wait’.

The partner with the job has at least another 15 years of work to do (and all their retirement funding will come from this partner’s investments, or investments set up in the stay at home parent’s name that were set up and funded by the working partner).

Is the stay at home partner being reasonable to declare their job is completed when the children are 18, even if the other partner has another 15 years of work to do?

How is the stay at home parent planning on funding their retirement?

So they want to enjoy a retirement whilst the other has been stressed by having to provide for the family?

You don’t retire from being a parent, SAHP or not. What a bizarre way of looking at things.

Also, they should be doing the lion’s share of household chores.

YABU. I feel sorry for the working partner.

The SAHP sounds lazy and entitled. Retirement from being a SAHP means getting a job.

Are they both happy with the arrangement?

Really confused, so the SAH parent to older children with now more free time during the day still shares household chores 50/50? Don’t think that’s fair!

Lol, of course not. They should retire together. Although - are their ages similar?
And - if the wohp has a super high income job, then the sahp will never get close to being a drop in the ocean.

The SAHP is being unreasonable if they are expecting the working parent to fund their retirement. They should be doing more of the household chores too.

Why would you care?

Are they implying they are not going to do any household chores anymore?

Bloody charmed life..no work investments set up in their name . Early "retirement" shared chores..

Are you the stay at home parent OP?

Agree!

What would a stay at home parent be retiring from?

Yes, let's get that SAHP doing more chores. 'Let's call it "the lion's share" and have 1000 posts about this urgent issue.

What are they 'retiring' from? Aren't they just going to carry on as they are as they don't work?

Your post doesn’t make it very clear what the options are.

A SAHP doesn’t exist when the kids go to school. Sorry. It’s just laziness.

Similar ages for both partners. All retirement income for both partners will come from investments set up & funded in both their names by the working partner over the years (and the need to keep building that up is the main reason the working partner won’t retire early).
Both partners have been relatively happy with the arrangement whilst the children were younger. Some resentment has started to build more recently as the children have become older.

If you are neither partner, stay out of it. If you’re the working partner, what was the expectation when the SAH partner decided to stay home with the children?

The way the op is written so derogatorily against the sahp, which if it’s the whole story would be fair, the op is unlikely to be the sahp.

Maybe they are going to retire as SAHP & get a job?
My mum went back to work when we finished school.

The SAHP needs to do far more than 50%. They also need to do something useful if they have no need to earn an income. Church warden, local Councillor, school governor/volunteer, driving the elderly to hospital appointments.

Gently, may I ask what the SAHP does all day? I was bored after the youngest had been in reception for a term and I did about 98% of home and children.

This is nonsense. How can you retire from staying at home?
Most people manage to look after their children and work. You retire from a job, not from having children. And this person hasn’t even taken on full house responsibilities.
I imagine they are joking, tbh.

Who’s resenting whom?

So you are the working partner OP?