To ask if you are not a Christian, what non Christian values you live by?

[BlossomBlanket]

Just that really!

I’m reasonably sure that ego, judgment and generally thinking you are better than everyone is a big no no in any religion…

Indeed. A smug belief in your own moral superiority doesn't seem terribly well aligned to the teachings of Jesus, or indeed to the teachings of any religion.

I wonder if the Christians who act like this realise the extent to which they alienate people with this lack of humility.

People like this are one of the many hypocritical undertones of religion.

I'm not sure I've ever come across a pleasant Christian on mumsnet* (at least not on threads of this sort). It's disappointing, and doesn't reflect anyone I know in real life. But maybe there's a certain 'type' who feel the need to post.

• (actually just thought of one who's lovely, so that's something)

To be fair I've found quite a few very respectful, interesting Christians with whom I've been able to debate, agree on many things, disagree on others. This is my first time being advance stalked.

I have no doubt that there are lots of lovely Christians on MN, as there are everywhere else. In my experience, it is only a very small but vocal minority who are troubled by the belief that their faith somehow makes them superior to others. I have met this type IRL too, unfortunately, but they are few and far between usually. Just quite noisy.

Exactly, all my RL friends who are Christian are lovely and not at all judgemental. The lady who used to run my support group for relatives of addicts is wonderful. She started out as a single mum, having had a teenage pregnancy, and so she is absolutely not judgemental at all because she's been on the other side. Her openness and humility are an example.

I think it's incredibly cruel to bring girls and boys up in an environment which encourages behaviours that harm them, let them make the mistakes and then leave them to suffer the consequences. Young people, girls and boys, do not have the experience or wisdom to make the best choices. And one lifetime is far too short to be blighted by the consequences of certain actions.

It's amazing the things that really make people bristle, it's as though a nerve really has been touched

But that is assuming that enjoying casual sex always leads to harm and regret. it doesn't. It's also assuming that living under the strictures of religion always brings safety and happiness. It doesn't.

I think it's incredibly cruel to bring young people up to believe they must live their lives a certain way, whether that makes them happy or not.

But you know, each to their own and all that...

No "stalking" needed as you make yourself so visible-

No doubt and some of them end up with the same medical problems as I have flagged up.

www.theguardian.com/society/2022/aug/11/rise-in-popularity-of-anal-sex-has-led-to-health-problems-for-women

If you think that a life of wearing incontinence products is funny, then you have a very warped sense of humour.

Advanced searching someone is stalkery. It's also frowned on here - bad manners. I haven't advance searched you, because I'm better than that.

I've been on gere 15 years, not 10.

Do lesbians have a lot of anal sex then???
I mean, I'm just humouring you here. You may have more fun on the Sex board.

I have no idea what "advanced searching" is and in any case I wouldn't need need to do it as you have been very visible for the past 10 years.

I think the jury is out on whether casual sex is in any way beneficial, particularly for women. I'm with Louise Perry on this one, I think we've been sold a pup and it's actually pretty soul-destroying, not to mention the practical consequences of things like STIs, unwanted pregnancies etc. I don't think it's healthy for society that doing one of the most intimate and vulnerable things you can do with virtual strangers had been so normalised. And actually, a lot the younger generation are moving away from some of the (not so) liberating attitudes of their parents' generations, so this whole attitude of 'do what you like if you're not obviously and immediately hurting anyone' is starting to sound quite dated.

And we all live under 'strictures' of some sort. Hopefully, anyway.

In that case I shall just take a bow. I'm glad to have been visible and so memorable specifically to you.

Yes, on reflection there are some nice Christians on here (and by here, I mean specifically threads that discuss religion). It's possible that the negative ones just stand out more in my mind.

I actually agree with you and I've not indulged in casual sex myself. Not do my DC.

But that isn't because I've told them not to, or threatened them with the wrath of a nonexistent god. They've come to it through open conversations about sex, relationships and life. We don't need religious rules for our young people to realise what is and is not conducive to living a happy and fulfilling life. The best 'strictures' are those people arrive at for themselves.

I'm sorry to hear that your kids had such bad judgement.

My dd was perfectly capable of making sensible choices that kept her safe and happy. I think it probably helps if you're able to have open, honest and non judgemental conversations with them about stuff as they navigate the teen years. It must be very difficult for everyone if they think they need to cover stuff up for fear of disapproval.

Snap!

I don't understand the purpose of this thread. <fails to find a puzzled emoji>

Well, that's good - but why do you insist on caricaturing a religious upbringing? Do you not think it's possible for Christian parents to have open conversations with their children about their values and choices?

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