Disgusted by school’s response to complaint about pervy teacher - Update

[SophEll]

I have debated whether to post this update but I promised I would in the previous thread (www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5325717-disgusted-by-schools-response-to-complaint-about-pervy-teacher) and I’m someone who keeps their word.

I have had an acknowledgment of my email to the Chair of Governors who assures me they will ensure my previous correspondence with the school will be personally overseen by the Headteacher as opposed to the senior member of staff who replied previously.

The Governor has understandably explained that the school cannot share the details of any internal disciplinary action, but has assured me the head teacher will provide me with a further response in due course, and asked me to provide my contact number. I’ve also confirmed that should it be required, my friend would be happy to provide her account of the evening’s events.

This proves that the school previously dismissing this without investigation was inappropriate, so I must say I’m feeling rather smug right now at this vindication. Given their prompt response, the Governor clearly recognises the reputational impact something like this could have on the school.

Thanks to all those who provided suggestions on how best to proceed (including those who said I should have laughed it off, been flattered etc) - I’ll endeavour to provide a further update once the headteacher concludes their investigation. An impressively prompt response by the Chair - the joys of retirement I guess!

Staff shortages, behaviour,complaints from ACTUAL parents, safeguarding updates, recruitment, new systems and processes, Y11 Mocks, SEN provision
Just a few from this months agenda at the school where I am (unelected) Governor

Can you read? He never did anything of the sort.

She isn't a parent

@op Schools are falling over themselves to retain teachers these days, especially at Secondary. Also (not to offend any teachers here - I am one myself) have you seen the standard of young teachers lately in some of the grittier schools? A minority are only-just literate. Schools, it seems, will take anyone willing to do the job.

So for all of @op’s high-minded, grandiose comments about ‘professional standards’ and misconduct, the school will likely minimise what was only, after all, a throwaway comment (albeit misguided) on a night out. This is especially true if he is half decent at the job with reasonable attendance and turns up to do it every day. In this case, they will be desperate to retain him - quite rightly.

Misogyny is now treated as a hate crime by some police forces. Nottinghamshire for example.

As it should be.

Oh dear can you not fathom that women have different opinions to you?

It’s very sad that homophobic and racist behaviour is considered a hate crime yet making creepy, unsolicited, lewd comments towards women is not.
Consider this. What if he’d made a comment to a gay woman about turning her straight and she had recognised him and reported it to his school? Would you view that the same way?

Why are people still persisting in throwing the word rape around.

I'd also say there is quite a strong difference between a comment made which was made in private and can not be verified properly (as both parties are drinking) and making a very public comment online which can be evidenced

But this is in theory, in the rule books. In practice, no one applies (or expects) these standards.

Two women out socialising, obviously got into conversation with two guys. One says sleezy remark. Friend says excuse me. Guy says joking obviously and scuttles off into the night.

Turns into a hang him by the balls debate

Op I bet you're loving this as your second thread was carefully worded to sound smug and the Little cheesy meme, this is EXACTLY what you wanted🤣

Teachers are bound by Teacher Standards. Part 2 covers professional and personal conduct -

PART TWO: PERSONAL AND PROFESSIONAL CONDUCT
A teacher is expected to demonstrate consistently high standards of
personal and professional conduct. The following statements define the
behaviour and attitudes which set the required standard for conduct
throughout a teacher’s career.
 Teachers uphold public trust in the profession and maintain high
standards of ethics and behaviour, within and outside school, by:
o treating pupils with dignity, building relationships rooted in mutual
respect, and at all times observing proper boundaries appropriate
to a teacher’s professional position
o having regard for the need to safeguard pupils’ well-being, in
accordance with statutory provisions
o showing tolerance of and respect for the rights of others
o not undermining fundamental British values, including democracy,
the rule of law, individual liberty and mutual respect, and tolerance
of those with different faiths and beliefs
o ensuring that personal beliefs are not expressed in ways which
exploit pupils’ vulnerability or might lead them to break the law.
 Teachers must have proper and professional regard for the ethos,
policies and practices of the school in which they teach, and maintain
high standards in their own attendance and punctuality.
 Teachers must have an understanding of, and always act within, the
statutory frameworks which set out their professional duties and
responsibilities.

If he'd made those comments to a complete stranger he'd likely be off the hook. The fact that he knew her THROUGH SCHOOL and made a comment about bending her over the desk ABSOLUTELY mean he should expect consequences for his conduct, even outside the classroom.

The profession doesn't need twats like that education kids. I hope he gets a right blocking (not that op will ever hear anything more than 'its been dealt with via our own disciplinary process's which is absolutely right if frustrating

OP wasnt a former pupil, she was a parent of a former pupil and a grown women. He wasnt fantasizing about a school girls, but an adult women he had never taught or even known as a teenager

Because this is yet another example of women being subjected to the creepy, leery, sexually aggressive comments and advances of men that make them feel uncomfortable, that they don’t ask for, men who think they can do and say what they like. It’s one end of a scary continuum with rape at the other end. Yes, some women will tell him to shut up and move on and think nothing more of it. Some might even feel flattered, even although they shouldn’t because this type of behaviour has nothing to do with properly respecting a woman and everything to do with power. Others will feel uncomfortable, intimidated and vulnerable and that’s just not ok.

The governor only took your name and number and forwarded your email onto the head. He didn't tell you whether the teacher was going to be investigated only that the head will take a look. If the head decides to investigate they won't tell you the outcome. As previous posters has said the senior teacher would have to talk to the head first before emailing you.

It said don't do nothing illegal it didn't include bad chat up.lines.

Yes but that poster talks about relationships with parents or similar.
There is a lot of what if this and what if that on here and the other thread along with outright misinformation
The Teacher was sleezy and inappropriate and should not have said what he did, that is not in question here
What is in question is the lengths OP seems to want to go to to se him punished and the absolute delusion about what she thinks the fob off from the school really means.

Interesting that OP ignores all the posts criticising her actions ,with pps giving their well-argued reasons, and only quotes the few which agree with her

Do you actually think anyone reads or cares about this shite -
‘Teacher Standards Part 2. Professional and Personal Conduct’

It’s just a document that exists somewhere because it has to. It’s only referred to, extremely rarely, if the school wants somebody out for a work-related reason, such as abysmal classroom performance*, not abysmal late-night chat-up lines.

*I’n thinking of an inability to manange behaviour or deliver the curriculum.

Really don't get how so many people here are not getting the fact that the OP isn't complaining that the guy came onto her, but rather linked it into when he was in a position of trust with her and her children as a teacher. Totally unacceptable even if 'minor' on the scale of inappropriate behaviour. Anyone in a position of trust has a code of conduct. Breach it and expect a bollocking. If the school don't bollock him that is in my opinion a reflection of declining standards, overwork, and burn out on the side of the school, not that OP is wrong.

Agreed, about her delusional self importance and her delusions of grandeur.

They would be very silly to bother.

It would break many laws.

But if you think that you can keep pushing this up to the next person eventually you will end up on the wrong side of the law.

And some, clutch those pearls, might have found his comment sexy and got to know him a little better. Not you, obviously, not me not now, but I've responded to worse lines in my younger days.

The drunk man misjudged his audience, walked it back, took himself off. His comment wasn't even particularly graphic or perverted, just plain old vanilla sex. It was crude, clumsy, sleazy, inexpert flirting. But I really can't see the misogyny here, or any aggression.

Chat ups and hook ups happen. This is normal human behavior. His approach was crap and the op should have told him so. Going after his career is not on.

How on earth did some people on here ever meet their partner? Just the suggestion of someone being attractive to someone seems to be offensive, sexually aggressive or a misogynistic hate crime.
Dear me the pearl clutching outrage