Disgusted by school’s response to complaint about pervy teacher - Update

[SophEll]

I have debated whether to post this update but I promised I would in the previous thread (www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5325717-disgusted-by-schools-response-to-complaint-about-pervy-teacher) and I’m someone who keeps their word.

I have had an acknowledgment of my email to the Chair of Governors who assures me they will ensure my previous correspondence with the school will be personally overseen by the Headteacher as opposed to the senior member of staff who replied previously.

The Governor has understandably explained that the school cannot share the details of any internal disciplinary action, but has assured me the head teacher will provide me with a further response in due course, and asked me to provide my contact number. I’ve also confirmed that should it be required, my friend would be happy to provide her account of the evening’s events.

This proves that the school previously dismissing this without investigation was inappropriate, so I must say I’m feeling rather smug right now at this vindication. Given their prompt response, the Governor clearly recognises the reputational impact something like this could have on the school.

Thanks to all those who provided suggestions on how best to proceed (including those who said I should have laughed it off, been flattered etc) - I’ll endeavour to provide a further update once the headteacher concludes their investigation. An impressively prompt response by the Chair - the joys of retirement I guess!

What do you think ‘due process’ entails in this instance? At most they’ll ask him if he said it. He may say yes. He may say no. If he says no he might not even be lying as he may not recall. Nobody can investigate any further. He may be told not to do it again.
Alternatively, the Head may do nothing for a day or 2 then tell you she’s investigated and dealt with the issue. As you’ve already been told they won’t share with you what ‘dealt with’ means.

You're reading a lot into that message from the governors. Whatever they decide to do (bin the complaint probably) they aren't going to tell you.

You take yourself way too seriously. It’s absolutely hilarious. This has to be a joke because rarely have I come across such a self important, attention seeking moron. I bet you’re a fucking nightmare as a mate 🤣🤣🤣

He didn't say it to an ex patient. He said it to an ex patient's relative.

I am really surprised that schools don’t care about unprofessional behaviour of their staff out of hours. Probity etc is a big deal with NHS staff and specifically addressed in appraisals. I didn’t realise schools were so uninterested.

Can you be given a warning about a comment you made outside of when your employer was paying you.

The comment might have been sleazy but it wasn’t illegal.

What you got up to in the club? They are most probably ribbing him in the staff room. There is nothing to investigate they are hoping you go away.

I don’t know many employers who would investigate their employees for propositioning a member of the opposite sex in bar outside of work to be honest. It simply isn’t work related and you have no professional relationship with this man If it had been a random unknown you would have forgotten about it by now, but because you recognised him you’re pursuing a vendetta in which seemingly the only thing that will satisfy you is him losing his job. You clearly don’t have enough to worry about.

Today, you continue as yesterday, refusing to take on board views different to your own. As many have said, the CoG's response does not provide proof that what has happened is 'a very serious matter'.

Given what teachers are saying here about schools’ lack of interest in their staff’s behaviour, I think that governor email was just a neutral fob-off. I doubt the school will do anything.

Nothing actually suggests either school or the Governors consider it a "very serious matter". They've responded saying they'll look into further. That doesn't at all they have said it needs full disciplinary proceedings or anything at all. The next thing you hear could just as easily be another email saying they've re-read your complaint and still decided it is out of their remit and they consider it closed.

They've sent you a standard holding response is all.

And this is exactly why her complaint could potentially be career ending. All it takes is for one person at the school to hear about the complaint and Chinese whispers will start. Even once the matter is closed, mud still sticks even if he isn't spoken to about it formally. Rumours like that don't go away and could make his role at the school untenable.

No worries.

OP is being a dickhead regardless of whether she’s retired or not anyway.

My current GP would be inappropriate

Same as if OP was STILL a parent

She's not

It was a pervy comment, not great but not that bad really when he'd clearly had a few drinks.

Threads like this scare me. You're taking it too far. He made one comment! If he'd said it at school then fair enough. He was a bit of a dick in a social setting away from school when he'd been drinking.

Why not contact him directly about it? Why would you complain to his employer? Do you want him to be sacked?

I know there has been the odd occasion where I've made an inappropriate comment or two to men I've fancied when I've had a few too many drinks. Not something I'm proud of or a regular habit by the way. I don't think it's ok and I absolutely wouldn't say anything inappropriate when sober. I dread to think those men could go to my employer, make a complaint, and potentially have me struck off from my profession.

Is this the society we live in now? Contacting someone's employer over one stupid comment outside of work?

Fuck sake it's very common

There was one in my year, my mom had one when she was at school, they're in the paper regularly

Wow, OP. You’re really after blood here. The guy was a tit, but honestly does it really matter?

What - a meme of a character who made up a load of bollocks and wasted people's time to get what he wanted?

Call your friend for a witness statement? They aren’t the CPS.

No, read the first OP again. He didn't mention a student in any way. He said he had fantasised about the OP, back when she was a parent of one of his students.

You sound like a spiteful bitch. What a nasty person you are, trying to wreck someone’s career.

The TRA does look at allegations of behaviour that fall short of the standards expected that are unrelated to school. Fairly frequently an arrest for driving under the influence comes up, and I have seen teachers given a prohibition order, especially where they have tried to cover it up, so honesty is also called into question. While this isn't an offence, it wasn't just a clumsy advance. He referenced a professional encounter in a really inappropriate way. That is where the issue lies, from a professional POV. You don't have to meet the threshold of harm for children's safety to be guilty of professional misconduct.

I agree with you completely. I'm just a bit surprised at the level of opposition to a woman making a choice to complain. As I said earlier, the outcome for this man won't be down to the OP. The complaint will be investigated by other people. All OP has done is told the truth about a situation that happened to her, which I think she has the right to do.