After school detention is a thing now?

[PennyWhistleSweet]

My 11 yr old yr 7 son has been issued an after school detention for disrespecting a new teacher.

We never had them at my high school and wanted to know what you all thought of them.

Myself, I'm currently at whits end with him calling me a fucking bitch and pushing me etc (another thread for another day) so I'm hoping this might give him a bit of a shock.

..it's always been a thing....

Yes my son has had a few after school detentions. Silly things like being daft in class or on one occasion, not wearing his tie correctly. He has to learn, there are rules and he must abide by them. I am largely supportive of it. I’d be more worried about what you’re doing about your 11 year old calling you a fucking bitch?

Same here, most detentions are lunchtime BUT if persistent offending they do make them after school too.

I had them when I was at school, I'm 35 now, although it wasn't automatically an after school one we had a lunchtime one first and if we failed to attend we would get an after school one for the day after

They were a thing when I was at school in the '80s and have been a thing in schools I have taught in more recently. An after-school detention is often only given after other sanctions such as several lunchtime detentions or putting a child into isolation have failed (though I appreciate this might differ from school to school).

Detentions have been a sanction for as far back as I can remember. Schools are required to give notice of after school detentions, but not shorter break time ones, although breaks are so short these days, there probably isn’t time.

If your child was ‘a darling’ before, even with his diagnosis, what has happened to change that? It’s not simply a question of a new teacher, because you e said that he’s aggressive towards you.

Whether he has other conditions or not, there are behaviours that shouldn’t be tolerated at home and at school. Any sanction you give at home is your responsibility, but in school, the sanctions will be detailed in the behaviour policy on the website and will be what you signed up to when you accepted a place at the school.

I'm really surprised that they were about. I like a previous posters idea of them being for persistent 'offenders' but this is a first for him. Yes he's horrible to me but he's usually a shy, well behaved boy at school.

That wouldn't work as the school just ends up keeping them in isolation during the school day if they skip detention.

I believe his issue is with me alone. He's not got a negative attitude towards women. He 11 FFS!

How dare they give a punishment that makes things difficult!

The whole point of a punishment is to be as undisruptive to the person being punished as possible. How else are they going to learn?

Its not surprising he'd start on a teacher given how he speaks to you at home though is it. Probably a good thing the school are nipping it in the bud.

I get that's the point of a punishment but the fact remains that we live rurally and have to both work full time. There's not always a parent on hand.

I was at secondary school from 1999-2006, and after-school detentions were certainly done there - usually for more serious infractions.

I had after school detentions in the early 2000s. Not new at all. And Saturday detentions!

This was a state school btw and the punishment was picking gum off desks, collecting rubbish, cleaning the floors and desks etc

Most 11 year olds don’t call their mum a fucking bitch and be violent towards her 🤷‍♀️
I’d stop making excuses for him - shy and well behaved my arse.

I got one in the 90’s for chewing gum

@Finallydoingit24 I can't stress what a massive change in personality he's had. This is not him and I think he's going through some deep issues.

I’m in my 20’s and they were a thing when DH and I were both at school.

They've always been a thing. I had a few in secondary school in 1994 - 1999

They were a thing when I was at school in the 90’s. Never same day though - there was always at least 24 hours notice. Lunchtime detentions were for more minor infractions. The school ds went to didn’t do them (it might have even been a blanket thing across our local authority) as too many students relied on school bus services and it was common for secondary age dc to be picking up younger sibs as well.

Afterschool detention was always a thing in the UK, we had it when I was in school (i'm 58) and my son's school still has them. Kids might get them for ridiculous reasons, but it sounds like you have much bigger problems to deal with. Your son called you a fucking bitch and pushing you? That blatant aggression, misogyny and disrespect needs to be addressed and dealt with, before he's beating up his girlfriend or wife. You and your husband sound quite passive in your handling of it.

After-school detention is still absolutely a thing in our local secondary. I'd be backing those teachers in every possible way until your son's dreadful behaviour improves. Let them help provide some of the consequences.

Oh here we go again. I was waiting for it. Blame the teacher. That'll solve your child's issues.

After school detention has been a thing, always, in just about every secondary school. Sometimes there are issues if students are bused in, but otherwise, an hour after school. The ultimate consequence.