Fed up of neighbours side door always open!!!

[exceptionale]

This is the 4th summer we’ve lived in our bungalow now and I am really fed up of listening to the elderly couple next door’s noise.
they have their kitchen door open for 6 months a year and they seem to spend 90% of their day in the kitchen. They are both nearly 80 but they seem to have rediculous amounts of energy and barely sit still, the phone is always ringing, they shout down the phone when talking to people. The radio and Tv is on loud and it’s bloody annoying!!
the problem is they are very nice people but they are pissing me off because in my opinion it is inconsiderate but they clearly don’t think it’s unusual to hear neighbour noise all summer long. We bought a detached house thinking we would hear less of our neighbours but with these people we hear them more.
The thing is they probably wouldn’t mind listening to us all day but that doesn’t make me comfortable with it.
AIBU?

You actually sound unhinged now, not just nasty.
Shameful posts from you.

Get a mini WIFI speaker and put it near your own open doorway. Volume up loud! Lots of dance music and new stuff that they’ll hate. Maybe a bit of death metal too.

Is that not just normal life with neighbours? We live in a detached cottage with an older set of neighbours either side and I can hear them all the time in the Spring and Summer pottering about, listening to music, chatting while gardening etc. We all have our doors open all day. As long as they are not blasting rave music, have all day barking dogs or constantly screaming kids, I'd say it's a winner.

Nursery rhymes on loud might do it. Nothing more aggravating which it sounds like you might be about to find out :)

After your updates I don't think speaking to them would do any good.
If both your side doors open right opposite each other I'd put a radio on right next to the door when you have yours open (or even when it's closed) It'll cover some of the noise coming from them hopefully.

Gosh maybe you live next door to my parents.
They have way more energy than me at 80. Garden is immaculate, home immaculate and they go out for walks and bike rides everyday. They are also a bit deaf.

if they are nice just tell them you can hear their entire life and the noise feels intrusive- could they close the door if they are on the phone or watching telly or turn down their volume. My parents wouldn’t mind being told if you said it nicely.

Just move.

Your neighbours could soon pop their clogs and a new even noisier couple/family could move in their house.

I can’t imagine being this hysteric over my next door neighbours having their door open. What are you doing with your days? Do you work? Do you have hobbies? Or do you just sit and wallow from the sound of them talking?

On a happier note (you’ll be pleased to hear 😂), I’m taking notes here, leaving back door open regularly for fresh air is obviously the life giving force here! They sound fabulously fit for 80 year olds! Sorry OP, looks like you’re going to have to buckle in for a while yet haha. I have 6O odd years olds next to my detached house and it drives me a little mad when everything is flung open and they’re playing extra loud with their young grandkids whilst I’m wfh so I can only imagine the annoyance of it being a regular thing! Poor poor you! 😅

I can empathise OP. Have elderly neighbours one side. Always in their garden in summer and peer over our fence often as they’ve planted stuff that grows on their side of the fence and apparently needs constant watering / nurturing. They give us unsolicited advice about gardening and other stuff. My DH is much better than me at humouring them, but as a private person I just say “hi” and run in the house as fast as I can. Keep doors closed too. I’m a miserable cow - lol.

Seriously - they’re probably a bit lonely as they have no family locally…perhaps the same for your neighbours OP. I would willingly be there for the neighbours if they needed me in an emergency, but can appreciate your need for peace, quiet and privacy.

Would it be better if they were 30 something with young children running in and out? Or do you just want silence.

I hope they have many healthy, sprightly summers ahead of them.

If my Dmum and her mates are anything to go by you’ve a few years yet! Not sitting down is key. Her group are 81-88 and all like 69 year olds. One still skis!

The best thing you can do is accept that other people are allowed to live their lives. None of what you've described is anything other than the sound of people happily going about their own business. And you say they're nice people, too. Leave them alone, OP. They're not being inconsiderate but you're not being very nice.

You’re a nasty piece of work you ain’t ya! Good luck to them I hope they turn their radio up a lot louder this year!

You Are Being Unreasinable (YABU)

Joyce, I agree with Miriam. Your son in law is the devil incarnate and needs castrating.
Ken, blimey, you think Jerry would have learned his lesson after the last op, but he never listens to anything the consultant says, does he?
Hours of fun 😂

I don't shut my door in the summer unless it's night time. I'm not especially noisy but you can hear the phone ring etc. from the garden. I used to hear my next door neighbour speaking on the phone almost every night until she moved.
Some people live next door to hostile or really anti social people, so I'd be grateful that isn't you.

They are allowed to do this, if that’s what they wish, however they may be completely unaware how noisy they are. You’ve got 2 choices as far as I see it, 1) go round and ask if they could try and be a little quieter as you can hear everything they say & do. Or 2) start playing some rage against the machine / death metal and hope they take the hint! I’d be drawn to do number 1!

They’re talking, answering the phone and watching tv. This is a you problem.

It's not a 'you problem' if they're doing it really loudly! It's inconsiderate. The world is divided between those who can tune out noise and those who are really stressed by it. As someone who falls in the latter camp, I think there needs to be more understanding that we can't just ignore noise and it's very stressful and invasive.

OP, I would maybe talk to them about it and frame it as a problem revolving around their privacy as much as something that disturbs you - i.e. 'you might not be aware but when your door is open we can hear all your conversations, which I'm sure you'd prefer to keep private. Also it does feel a bit intrusive for us.'

I agree completely.
Nobody needs to shout when living near others, at least on a regular basis.
Nobody with decent hearing needs to blare their tv/stereo/radio/gaming devices.
Living near others comes with a list of common courtesies: be kind, be respectful, be polite and tread lightly.
Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition.

Good for them i say! Why should they sit indoors to please you. They prob don't have many years left.

You’re a nasty piece of work you ain’t ya! Good luck to them I hope they turn their radio up a lot louder this year!

This comment is actually really triggering for misophonia sufferers. Please be more considerate.

How do they manage to keep the door wide open without the wasps'n'moths getting in ?
Flies , bees , daddy long legs
Bloody hate them but they swarm in !

Maybe they have one of those oldie porn shop door curtains.

So uncharitable and ageist.
Another pop at the elderly post.
I'd love my 84 year old parent to be making noise in the kitchen rather than slowly dying from dementia in a home