To not understand how people fund their lives and feel a bit jealous?

[Travelenthusiast]

Just that really. Mid-30s and we have what I have always seen as a healthy income of £180k per annum (obviously been lower when we were younger and increased over time), and had some family help - about £50k to buy our first house several years ago.

And i’m not complaining about our quality of life- I know we are lucky and can afford a good holiday every year, and a more expensive/ luxury holiday occasionally. DS does a few extra-curricular activities, we don’t have to worry about the food shop total (we aren't extravagant at all) and can afford to eat out a few times a month etc. And I know we are lucky as I grew up in a poor family and understand the stress and implications.

But we have a very modest 3-bed house (with a big mortgage), our car is ten years old and there’s no way we could replace it, we can rarely afford to replace clothes and shoes for us (of course do for DS), days out are thought through to reduce cost, would make pack lunches to take into work and don’t buy shop coffees, we could not afford private school, and often we cut out the eating out to add to savings instead- basically £ is not abundant. And we are relatively careful financially and not big spenders generally. None of this is me saying our life is bad- I know we are really luckily, but just trying to give an idea of limitations / life.

We do live in SE commuter belt (not london) where everything is very expensive.

But we are surrounded by families who have so much more, so apparently effortlessly. We are genuinely one of the only local families without a 4x4 (i know cry me a river 🤣). How do others have it all and have the big house, the new car, endless holidays, SAHM often, the new clothes, meals out, lots of savings? Is it simply that they earn much more? I know we are lucky but I just don’t understand how so many can be so wealthy? Could most of our network really have a household income over £200k?!

Lol talk about twisting what I said. Any excuse to be offended over something aye. Where the fuck did I attack disabled people 😂

If you really are such a highly intelligent gods gift to the country tax payer why is your reading comprehension so poor?

Yeah, try giving HMRC a call and telling them that “your actual life” and what you think overrules the tax laws of the country. Let us know how you get on.

Lovely. More personal insults and still very evidently you have zero wish to engage with the numbers.

Your posts speak for themselves.

And what have I said that's made you think I resent disabled people or wealthy people?
Made it quite clear in practically every one of my comments that I don't resent people earning more than me I just resent being told by someone that earns 4x as much as me that I'm somehow richer than them because "I must get free stuff and benefits". I only came on this thread to say it's bullshit. That's quite literally the only point I've made here

Haven’t read the full thread, but the answer is inherited wealth.

I've already told you our household income is 35k and the only benefit I get is child benefit which is only 25 a week. I've told you you have to earn less than 7k to get free school meals.

And you're still hellbent on insisting someone on 180k is worse off than someone on less than half of that because of "free stuff".
You're the one not engaging with the numbers you clearly have no idea just how low your income has to be to get all this "free stuff"

All you've done so far is go off on emotional rants accusing me of attacking disabled people? I think that says all we need to know

Your posts about disabled people:

17:26

“It's probably a family with ten disabled children.”

18:25

“ Well all I'll say is I've seen posters on other threads make similar assertions while failing to mention it's a family with numerous disabled children getting disability benefits.”

Your posts about your spite and anger at people who earn more than you are too numerous for me to have time to go back and quote, as I do have other things to do today, but are right here on the thread for everyone to see.

If you disagree with the numbers from the ONS or the tax thresholds or rates per the numbers I’ve quoted then please specify which ones you think are incorrect.

Think it's pretty obvious what I meant to anyone with a crumb of reading comprehension.

Every time I see someone mention a family getting thousands of pounds in benefits it always turns out there's more to the story such as the family having numerous disabled children. But then posters like yourself act like everyone on low income gets all that money in benefits. Not sure how that's me "attacking disabled people" ?

But I'm sure you just enjoy being offended over anything and everything.

Same goes for the high earners I've said on almost every comment I've made I don't resent people with a lot of money I just resent being told that I'm richer than them because I "get free stuff and loads of benefits" when I literally don't

All of this I obvious to anyone reading this thread. Enjoy your evening

Yet you called my posts “horse shit” and started ranting about “ten disabled children” when none of my posts mentioned disability, at all.

All of the numbers I provided were from the latest available data about housing and childcare costs and the UK tax and benefits rates and thresholds set in law.

All of my posts were about working parents providing for children. None of them included any disability allowances/ disabled parents/ non-working parents/ disabled children. Hence my bafflement at why you’d make such unpleasant comments about disabled children even when it had zero relevance to the numbers in my post that you apparently dispute, yet won’t explain which ones you believe are wrong or provide any evidence to support these assertions.

All I see is a lot of anger about anybody who might get something you don’t - even disabled children, whom those of us who are net taxpayers want to support and subsidise more than we subsidise you because they need more help than you - and a lot of anger against those who are subsidising your family because you are furious that they earn more than you and think that you should be able to insult them if they ever express any worry about their own finances.

All very distasteful, and counterproductive, and exemplifying precisely what is wrong with UK society.

Are you joking too??!! Try saying that to someone on low income / minimum wage. Yes we’re al suffering with the economic climate as it is but believe me, 180k a year is NOT a struggle. Change your lifestyle. Simple

Why is my real world situation not valid to you? I am not talking about tax laws. I am saying what our income is and that we only receive child benefit but you seem fixated on the one particular scenario you have posted. If yours is a reason to state minimum wage workers are significantly better off than ones on £180k why is mine not one to say that isn't true.

Am I “hoping too??!!”?

About what? What is this meant to mean?

Incomprehensible.

This is beyond tiresome now.

Your personal perception of your situation does not overrule objective reality. Facts are freely available from the ONS and .gov.uk or you can call HMRC/ DWP to check the rates if you don’t believe any of the publicly available information.

Oh wow that's a lot of words you're putting in my mouth.

My original comment when I mentioned horseshit was actually aimed at the idea that someone earning 180k is worse off than someone on 30k because of "benefits and free stuff" it wasn't originally aimed at any of your comments. Same for the comment about disabled children I quite literally said I've seen on other threads posters talking about low income families getting thousands of pounds in benefits but failing to mention there's more to the story such as numerous disabled children. I wasn't just talking about your posts, not everything is about you.

What makes you think I'm angry? You're the one who seems irrationally angry and that's why youre so hellbent on twisting what I've said. It's a thread everyone else can see in black and white what I've said you are making a fool of yourself and I'm tiring of repeating myself. So where have I displayed any anger to anyone earning more money than me. Unless you consider trying to clear up the misconception that all low earners get piles of benefits and free stuff as "anger and resentment"

Anyway not sure why you're still going when you said you had a busy evening

Fine you win. Your one scenario proves minimum wage workers statistically are significantly richer than ones on £180k after tax, housing and childcare bills.

Samslaundry - we are talking to a brick wall here mate. At least we now know we are richer than what we thought hey? I'll see you in the Maldives next week 😂we will leave all the high earners to go to Butlins. Poor sods.

FFS - there’s one of these threads every week or so - all these poor people earning £180k and the poor relation to their friends. Maybe you need to move up to the midlands where most of your neighbours will be less well off than you 🤣🙄

Utter rubbish and not what anybody said, at all, is it?

My point was that people will not work more for little or no financial benefit at all. That two households with similar earnings should have similar net incomes because these economic distortions are so damaging to growth and productivity. That headline gross earnings figures are only taken to be an indicative of how much disposable income someone has by people who are completely economically illiterate (as you and some other posters have demonstrated quite clearly in your responses in which you’ve denied economic facts yet refused to provide any evidence to support your entrenched and factually vacuous assertions).

I have also pointed out that constantly insulting those with either higher or lower earnings than you out of spite will achieve nothing and will ensure this economic decline continues, which will make you poorer, as well as those you despise because the extremely high marginal tax rates and counterproductive tax cliff edges mean that work is discouraged at various levels of earning ins the UK, including - as I stated earlier - for those claiming universal credit who are also disincentivised financially from working full time/ seeking for the same reason as those who hit the child benefit threshold or personal allowance/ childcare funding withdrawal threshold. To try to paint my posts as some sort of thing about “rich” people just shows you didn’t read them properly.

Functional tax systems that incentivise productivity and growth and higher tax revenues and living standards for everyone don’t work like that, because it doesn’t work.

The chip on your shoulder appears to be obscuring your view of reality.

TBF I think those in the £180k bracket are pinched when their DC are under 6. As are many others but the marginal difference does not necessarily seem fair in relation to the intellectual and arduous nature of some of their jobs.

However, fast forward a few years and the childcare costs drop and prospects are likely to improve. They are the ones more likely to receive an inheritance. Fast forward another couple of decades and both parties are likely to retire on about two thirds of their individual salaries, so the equivalent of £60k each. With mortgages paid and no NI or student loans to pay, the chasm becomes incredibly wide compared to those who have been on average salaries for their working lives. If the status quo remains, whack on another £24k in state pensions.

it’s a long game.

As I said, if you have any figures to refute any part of my calculations then go ahead. My point was to make clear how stupid these posters are who say “I earn 1/4 of that, what are you on about! You must be rich!”. Such comments, as my calculations demonstrate very clearly, show that these people have zero understanding of tax or economics and that many of the people they resent for earning more than them - and whom are paying for the access to state education for their children, their and their children’s NHS care, their infrastructure, policing, fire service, roads, railways, defence, AND their childcare and other child benefit etc that they don’t receive themselves - are actually poorer than them after tax, childcare and housing is paid.
Significantly poorer.

This is a direct quote from you.

So I'm "personally attacking" you when I say your reading comprehension sucks but it's fine for you to keep claiming other posters are completely financially illiterate. FFS.

I haven't seen anyone insult higher or lower earners. All me and the other post have done is explain our own situations income of 30-35k and no benefits except child benefit.

Just clearing up the misconception on this site that anyone not earning 100k is getting bucket loads of benefits making them richer than 100k households. And you carry on insisting and shitting that that is somehow "hating and resenting higher earners" 🙄 not sure if you're trolling or just have extremely poor reading comprehension anymore

Just FYI (genuinely) lots of us MN users without kids. Lots of point to it, lots of useful content.

Why did everyone jump on the op saying she must be wrong and not believe her lived experience and then get cross because others don’t believe yours?

She didn’t say they were on the breadline, just that she was surprised being a high earner that it seemed that they did less than other comparable friends and wondered why. A perfectly interesting and valid question.

I don't think anyone has doubted the OP's lived experience. She admitted that she has nice holidays and meals out so hasn't pretended to be on the breadline.

What has annoyed me and Samslaundry is that other people (NOT THE OP!) have compared them to minimum wage earners and their 'top ups'. There is an ongoing narrative that the gap between high earners and minimum wage ones is tiny or doesn't exist which in both our experiences is not the case but because there are situations whereby this may be true this has been taken as being absolute.