Neighbour I barely know approached DH to imply that I'm cheating

[NC2StayAnonymous25]

I've been with my DH for 8 years, we moved into our current properly (an apartment) 2 years ago.

Below us lives a woman and her son, who looks around 21ish yo.

We don't know them to speak to bar a polite hello when passing in the foyer.

About three weeks ago the son approached my DH and said "are you still with your misses?"

DH, confused, says "yes, why?"

The neighbours lad then tells him that he saw me with another man the previous week, on a certain street, talking to him on the doorstep, and he thinks that he should have words with me!

DH didn't mention anything about it until tonight when we had a disagreement about something unrelated.

I'm livid.

I was able to explain exactly who it was and why (completely, unequivocally innocent of any wrongdoing - I was collecting an amazon fire tablet from a seller on Facebook marketplace!)

I would understand it if the neighbours were friends of DH and had spotted me kissing/cuddling somebody, but to interfere and stir up trouble without any suggestion I was up to no good, has pissed me right off.

It's the implication that I'm not 'allowed' to interact with men in any capacity, or I must be shagging them.

I really want to give the lad a piece of my mind but I'm being told that if I do then I ..yes I.. am going to cause trouble.

Am I being unreasonable or is the neighbour?

So he waits until you're having a disagreement, where it is then definitely accusatory?

I've had the SAME man on my doorstep TWICE recently, whilst I was wearing PJs. The second time I invited him in... 😱

It was one of my best friends who is more like a brother to me. People often think we're a couple or having an affair but ... Eww. He is also very good friends with DH now too.

Your neighbour must lead a very dull life. She must have insinuated you were up to something with doorstep man. Just make your DH realise that she's obviously a very bored and lonely woman to do this.

WAS IT YOU THOUGH? And ARE YOU UP TO NO GOOD?

I would just forget the neighbour. Sounds like he has his own shit going on. Confronting him will probably cause unnecessary drama and I can't see the point of talking to him about it.

The only person I would concentrate on here is your husband. He kept it to himself and he is the one who has form for cheating.

I'm not sure I would even believe his story, really. The neighbour may have just said he saw you, not implying anything more, and your DH came to his own conclusions because he is projecting.

He certainly doesn't want you mentioning it to him, so I wonder if he's telling the whole story here. Everyone has decided this young man is an Incel and we have no idea if he even said much.

Op when you say your husband has been less than angelic what has he done, has he had an affair? Sounds like he's judging you by his own standards.

Oh look, the neighbour's here.

RE asking does DH trust me, I don't think he does completely no. He has been less than angelic himself and I think suspects that one day I might do something in retaliation. I wouldn't

In which case if there is no trust, there is no marriage and if you carry on like this then you are wasting your life with someone who will leave

I am presuming if your dh had sat on this information he would have very soon reasoned that if you were cheating then he could too

"Guess what that little scally across the road came to me saying?? He said you are having an affair with x neighbour! Hahaha haha!"

That's how you bring it up without being accusatory

I would have a word with his Mum seeing as he's behaving like a child. She may be interested in his mysognistic attitudes. Show you DH this thread so he understands too!

I would be fecking livid.
I have horrendous visual vertigo that flares up occasionally.
My neighbour messaged me thinking I was drunk, all my neighbours know I get really dizzy. She also sadly is a gossip and I know whe has spoken to other neighbours.
I have chosen to rise above it and ignore her.

The conversation never happened.
DH is lying and he is tracking you, or is suspicious of you collecting this item or something.
A stranger in your building would have no clue if said man was your brother, your cousin, your friends house. Whatever, it didn’t look suspicious and there’s no reason to have reported you.
More likely you have a jealous / suspicious H.
Ask the neighbour, ‘did you tell my partner you saw me somewhere?’ And you’ll find out pretty quickly.

Yes it was. And no OP wasn’t ’up to no good’. But then if you’d read her OP properly before rushing to post, you’d have known that.

How on earth does this guy know “lots of people” who would beat your dh up He lives in a fantasy world.

He might think he knows lots of people because he spies on people but I can guarantee this guy is a friendless creepy nobody with fantasies of being some sort if Mr Big

"Aye Right" that would be exactly how he broached it during an argument.....

...would be interesting to know the "topic" of the argument though..... 😈

Or he could just be a shit stirring little cunt

I think it's ok to knock on neighbours door and firstly ask if he had a conversation with DH on your whereabouts last week (whenever) and if he says yes, ask him why he felt the need to inappropriately approach DH and tell him something that he (neighbour) had concocted in his head and that wasn't true?!
If he says he didn't, tell him that DH has told you that he had and so, did you have a conversation about me with DH last week?

Seeing you said your DH hasn't been angelic does make it sound like he's going off from his own behaviour and is paranoid that you're going to cheat on him.

Someone else said no trust is no marriage and I agree.

Do you trust DH @NC2StayAnonymous25 ?

Seeing a woman talking to a man in the open is no reason to think they’re cheating.

Do it, OP! But maybe ring the company rather than putting it in writing, in case anyone there wanted to make trouble for you.