To think a man who needs you to “build with him” has no business dating?

[WittyOchreSwan]

Build with your therapist and financial advisor, not me.

If only it were Lego… at least then there’d be instructions and a finished product.

I love that poster. It’s like watching a giant, human-shaped delusion wander around the internet bumping into things.

Yes, but what in the name of Christ does “building” mean here?

Right! 😂😂😂

Wtf are you on about OP?

Building is a positive thing. I’d love to find someone to build a life with - not sure why you’re equating it to therapy etc. Of course he won’t be roping you in to do his accounts on date 3 but to have shared goals in a long term relationship is essential.

My DP is lovely but he has very different ideas about how life should look. I’m trying to be open minded about the different paths we could take, but having someone with a clear vision of how you make a home/life/business together is the dream as far as I can tell.

OP is single-handedly starting a tradwife movement, that I do know.

Build a bear?

Exactly - mutual readiness is the point. If I’m showing up emotionally balanced and financially stable. I’m not looking to take on a fixer-upper project in return. It’s about starting from a solid foundation on both sides.

To be fair that would be a fabulous username…

See you can say “showing up” as many times in this thread as you did in the previous one

Please give me links to these lunatics; i could do with a laugh. Just been on Facebook arguing with the pro - trans brigade.

I’m not sure what build means here.

If someone says they want someone to “build a life with” that sounds fine, doesn’t it. I mean, it’s pretty bland and cliched. But it doesn’t mean “please fix me”.

I’m not looking to take on a fixer-upper project in return. It’s about starting from a solid foundation on both sides.

In your property analogy surely the latter is the one building. The former isn’t building, just renovating.

Absolutely, now that’s the kind of building I can get behind.

I understand that MN apparently had drop in visits and engagement, but this paid for BS threads are not thw way forward....

It’s a phrase some men use when they’re not emotionally or financially ready for a relationship but they still want one - as in, “let’s build together” while they figure things out. It often means the woman ends up doing the emotional heavy lifting, supporting his goals, and settling for potential rather than stability. That’s not what I’m interested in.

Doesn't have the same vibe as grab your coat darling you've pulled 🤣

There are threads on here where young women can’t even get their boyfriends to clean the toilet or even buy a new toilet seat, so if you can find one who wants to build anything (a future, a shed, a bloody IKEA shelf!) snap him up!!!!

Personally I'd employ a brickie if I wanted some help building something. Anyone who uses idiotic buzzwords like this can get in the bin.

My issue is more with men who aren’t ready yet but expect a partner to help them ‘build’ the basics, like stability, direction, healing. That’s where I draw the line. I’m not applying to be someone’s life coach.

Maybe have a questionnaire ready for them to fill out to apply to date you.

Do you drive?

Do you have a job?

Have you ever lived away from your parents besides university?

Do you clean the toilet?

Do you cook?

Can you do DIY that won't fall down in a week?

Rate your assholeiness on a scale from 1 to 5.

Yep i think so similar posting style and user names ...

Only if the bear’s already got a job and a pension.

Oh, I forgot social media performative posts.

Yes , i was tempted to report the other " energy " thread but it was too funny to be deleted . Now I am thinking this poster just needs serious help.