Can I choose how my bridemaids have their hair?

[walliceandme]

Genuine question, getting married and want my bridemaids to all have the same hair - all of their hair is long so it'll be easy but one has a thick fringe and would it be rude if I asked her to have a hairstyle that clips it back? I want them all to have their hair like this but unsure how it'll work with a full fringe? AIBU?

This is one of the reasons no one actually wants to be a bridesmaids.

The Bridezillas become especially agitated where the look of their wedding photos is concerned!

Yes and paradoxically it usually makes the photos look awful when all or most of the bridal party aren't happy and don't actually feel comfortable or confident.

I wonder if anyone has ever come home from a wedding saying ‘You should’ve seen the state of those bridesmaids. With their different hairstyles. Shoddy planning all round. No class.’

Nobody likes a bridezilla.

My daughter was a bridesmaid at my brother’s wedding. The brides mother insisted my daughter have a hair style totally unsuitable for her type of hair. It made my daughter unhappy and she hated the wedding photos.

Omg, thank you for the laugh! I tried to unalive myself today with a shoelace but the ridiculousness of this 'dilemma' has made me glad I didn't succeed!

I think all looking exactly the same is boring .. mix it up a bit let them be who they are as individuals.
That's over the top .

No I don’t think that’s an ok thing to do.

If someone started telling me how to wear my hair, I’d turn up at the wedding with an Afro perm. Bloody cheek!

I see dance girls do it l the time, pin it in gel it back. Easy and quick, a wouldn't have nay problems doing it.

I'd just speak to her and explain you want a smart, uniform, matching look, would she mind?

Chance are shed say no.

If it is a problem, she will at least explain so you understand (hide a spotty forehead?)

I don't think there is anything wrong with it. It's your bug day! But just word it nicely x

Seems pretty controlling to me honestly, my bridesmaids had hair and makeup however they wanted though I bought them matching dresses (at least the same colour and material, I think they ended up picking the same style in the end but I’d have been happy with just matching colour and material but different styles) which we all went out and chose together.

However if it’s really important to you, I personally think it would be ok to ask if she would be ok with it. It might be no big deal to her for the day. But respect it if she says no.

When I was 19 I was bridesmaid to a
colleague, she was Australian, it was a hurried wedding, and she had no one to be a bridesmaid, as all her relatives and friends were in Australia She made me have my hair done to her specifications, it was horrible, and I spent the afternoon feeling ugly and uncomfortable, luckily she was rather short of money, so I supplied my own dress, which I made myself, and when we had posed for photos I went to the cloakroom and brushed out the laquered bouffant, resulting in a sort of auburn afro, which in my 1969 hippy phase, I was very satisfied with, and it went well with the green velvet maxi dress with long flowing sleeves.
Try to control people's hairstyles if you want, but I wouldn't comply now, as I did when I was younger, my body including hair is my own and I style it how I want.

I’ve had a fringe since my hair first grew (about 42 years ago) I wouldn’t pin back my fringe for anyone. A side sweep is as far as I’d go, and only if I really liked the bride

I think you have every right to ask them to put their hair up if that’s how you want it. It is your wedding and I’m sure they will understand.

After all the day is not about them.

No ,

I'd let her have her fringe.

I talked to my bridesmaids about what would work for them whilst also keeping them looking part of a group. I wanted them to look nice and feel lovely whilst also looking part of the same bridal party. The result was three half ponies, each styled slightly differently to suit the faces / preferences on my longer haired bms and one wispy bob styled into curls. The pony tails had pearl clasps on to match my veil comb (I have a thick, long loose bob) and the wispy curls went round a pearl hair band we'd carefully matched. Everyone looked pretty, happy, coordinated and like themselves.

Then again, mine were in different dresses (same colour, fabric, waistline but different necklines etc from David's Bridal) and had different accessories because I didn't want them to matchy match.

Rude and ridiculous

I don’t think you should dictate how anyone has their hair. Sorry but maybe concentrate more on yourself because their hair is just not important.

Controlling and ridiculous. If I were one of your bridesmaids I would probably find you a total PITA and pull out.

No you cannot tell them how to do their hair! It's so very personal and I assume you are already telling them which clothes to wear.
Tread carefully

If you're paying and not asking anyone to cut or dye it I don't see the issue

I really wouldn’t. They will want to look and feel good themselves and what flatters one won’t flatter the other. A girlfriend of mine hates her deep forehead so has a fringe.. she wouldn’t be too happy if I asked her to pin it back!

AHAHAHAHA
Poor bloke that gets married to this level of unhinged!

You can't buy people. I paid for my bridesmaids to get their makeup and hair done but I didn't ever tell them what to 'get'. I wanted them to feel fabulous on the day, so of course they could choose how they wanted to look. Bridesmaids aren't your Barbie dolls.