People that shout "THANK YOU!" to those that don't say it

[tvchoice]

Why do you do so?
Personally, if I hold a door or let someone through and they don't acknowledge and thank me, I don't let it bother me and simply get on with my day. The reason for this is I quite honestly couldn't care less how a total stranger behaves towards me, within reason of course, because they are exactly that. A stranger that means nothing to me.
Therefore, if they don't say thank you, it doesn't matter enough for me to need to react to it, but for many others, they have a different mindset. Help me understand! Why is this?
Surely someone would need to be important to you for their behaviour to affect you enough to react to it?

I don’t think that’s mean. Whether he knew it or not, the lady was the face painter and a please was definitely appropriate. I’m surprised you didn’t get in there first and prompt your child, that’s a parents job, no?

I always remind my kids who regularly forget. They’re kind kids and I know they don’t mean to be rude, but it IS rude by not saying please and thank you. I’m not punishing them, just reminding them and expecting them to repeat it.

See I try to teach my DC good manners but I'll always teach them to never trust a person who takes great pleasure in "calling people out". They'll turn on you as soon as they get the opportunity.

Because they are grown arse adults and it’s polite to say thank you!

Generally, I would say thank you if somebody held the door for me etc.
Once or twice though a person has declared “you’re welcome” at me when it didn’t seem clear to me that any thanks was due. Either I’ve been completely in my own head or I genuinely didn’t consider that they had done me any kind of courtesy. No offence on my part was intended, however.

No use doing it to fully grown-up people, but I always do it to children and teenagers. After all, if they are not taught at home, somebody should teach them. I must say it is mostly foreigners who forget to say 'thank you'. Half of my family are German and I am so aware of it. And I am embarrassed to say that on average, a junkie in a charity shop in Govan has better manners about the door etiquette than a German university professor.

If she was aiming it at the 3rd person why would she say that “not one of us” said thank you?

You step aside though to let them off

im not a THANK YOU shouter but rudeness is not acceptable in my eyes so i WILL call people out on it

That makes no sense. He didn't know she was the face painter. He thought she was a random woman in the queue making conversation with him. If it had been a random woman, replying 'A dog, please' would have sounded as though he was expecting her to pay for it!

I did do a sarcastic thank you to the man who let the door shut on me when I was heavily pregnant, limping from SPD, had a tired post-swim 2 year old on one hip and a swimming bag for two on the other side.
I was lacking in avaliable functional limbs to deal with a heavy fire door at that moment.

But the painter wasn’t his parent. I’d give his teacher a pass but not a random face painter . It just isn’t her place

It’s always women, its happened to me a handful of times in my life, Provided I notice, I always say thank you or gesture it and have had it shouted at me in a nasty tone because they didn’t hear it. I think it is a pathetic habit. Also a thanks is sometimes a an amicable head tilt or hand gesture, they don’t see it and I do wonder what is wrong with their life to be so hyper vigilant for a perceived slight. It’s like they are in a gang and been dissed.

Then you are rude too.

Call your own family out. But you can’t take over the world.

It was instilled in me from an early age that "manners cost nothing" and my DD was taught the same. I can't abide a lack of manners and don't hesitate to remind anyone to use them, usually in my best mum voice with raised eyebrows

It’s fine to think their manners leave something to be desired; but it’s rude to voice it.

😁 Know the feeling...

Did similar during perimenopause whilst DH was driving. He wasn't so amused when he realised the driver I was yelling at was driving a convertible and had the hood down.

It’s not always women but I guess women are expected to submit and so put themselves out for others more often

and yes when the fifth person has not acknowledged me moving aside and waiting for them my patience might well snap “and thank you too” - I am worth as much as they are

I don’t think it’s rude. Once you abandon polite behaviour, you can’t expect politeness yourself.

Exactly. There is definite misogyny at play here.

Weren’t you also taught that “ two wrongs don’t make a right?”

Manners are something you extend to others; they aren’t a standard you can require of strangers.

Why are you? Are you one of the people that is lacking in basic manners?

i do this! I cannot stand bad manners! It’s up there in the top 3 of things that I hate most!

It’s ignorant and it’s downright rude! Stop trying to excuse poor behaviour. If you haven’t got common decency to adhere to social norms then stay in!

’Two wrongs don’t make a right’ is the mantra of those who constantly exhort women to accept rude behaviour.

Exactly this. The irony of some people on here saying people are so 'soooo ROOOOOD!' for not thanking them for the enormous and arduous task of opening the door for them, and then being super obnoxious by attacking said person for not thanking them. Muppets! 😂