To think it’s fair to judge people on their appearance in certain situations?

[ThisQuickLemonPoster]

If someone shows up to a job interview in a stained hoodie or if a teacher is overweight and unkempt, it does affect how seriously I take them. AIBU to think “don’t judge a book by its cover” only goes so far?

Says the person who has made some very judgemental and unpleasant posts on this thread.

Because unhealthy overweight means they can't remember facts and pass them onto children?

Unhealthy overweight looking could mean they have health issues ( mental or physical) that could impinge on their performance, it could indicate a general lack of self care and that ‘I don’t care’ attitude could also seep into their attitude towards their work

I heard an employer of a very large company in London say in front of an entire audience ( 200+ people) that he doesn’t employ overweight people when he was asked what type of people does he hire…..granted this was 20 years ago and he probably wouldn’t voice his opinion on such matters so publicly now but the thinking would still be the same

Did she have mobility issues because she was obese or was she obese because she had mobility issues? Obviously I don't expect you out to answer, because you don't know, you just made a judgement.
What a horribly albeit comment to say that someone who doesn't have perfect mobility shouldn't teach. Imagine how many incredible teachers with disabilities that would rule out of a job.

Unless you are required to be a certain weight for your job, and I'm thinking along the lines of racing drivers etc there, your weight has no bearing on your ability to carry out a role like teaching, any office based job, computer work etc. You use your mind for that, and assuming someone overweight also doesn't care about their performance is wildly disrespectful and discriminatory.

I think you are delusional if you think employers don’t judge very overweight people

If to equally qualified candidates were in the running to get a job, one normal weight / thin and the other one very overweight, I can guarantee you that the job would be given to the normal weight / thin candidate

Well maybe I'm shallow but at my husband's recent funeral I was so happy to see all the family and friends had made a big effort to dress very smartly, and I hadn't said a word about a dress code. Except for 1 man who was very scruffy, but he dressed like that for his sons wedding! I think I would judge in an interview situation, it doesn't take much effort to look professional and smart.

Can you cite your sources, to be able to guarantee that?

Most people don't start a thread to 'find their tribe'. They don't need to blurt out whatever nasty thought passes a synapse either.

Everybody does make judgements about a myriad pointless things a day but there's no need to verbalise them. These threads just hurt people, which is the point of posting them.

I voted YABU which is a shame because you were SO close to being perfectly reasonable.

I'm a BIG advocate for dressing the part and showing respect with how you present yourself but you had to mention weight.

I can assure you, my weight has absolutely no impact on my ability to teach.

I was in local swimming pool last night and a grossly obese women walked (well waddled) from the changing rooms to the pool.

Waddled - what an unkind and unecessary way to describe that woman. You have no idea why she is overweight and struggling to walk. She is doing something positive by going swimming and it may have taken an immense amount of courage for her to get into a swimming costume and go. I think she deserves admiration not derision.

If to equally qualified candidates were in the running to get a job, one normal weight / thin and the other one very overweight, I can guarantee you that the job would be given to the normal weight / thin candidate
You're probably right but it is discrimination. Ignorance and bad judgement, it happens with good looks, race, weight, gender, similarly if it was a man vs women with equal qualifications, the man would most likely get the job.
Proving it is difficult.
Sadly people do judge incorrectly on appearances, I am slim, I am very weak, often tired, and scatty.

Nobody is out to hurt anyone ( I’m certainly not) but people who post usually want honest opinions otherwise what’s the point

The best teacher any of my kids have ever had was not slim, but she was absolutely the best teacher/person, i wish she could have taught all my children every year. The not shaved comments, how do you know they don't have a skin condition? my husband does and if he completely clean shaves he gets a horrible rash and needs treatment to sort it! I'm sure you would look down your nose just as much if he turned up with a horrible scabby face! And lastly the judgement about funeral outfits are absolutely revolting, its not about you the person is dead they don't know who is there or what they are wearing, it doesn't matter what you wear to say goodbye.

Some of my best teachers were overweight and dressed interestingly. How does weight impact teaching?

I was sort of with you until the weight bit.
Overweight does not equal unkempt
As normal weight does not equal perfect appearance
Weird take, if I'm honest

Agree, it is discrimination but no one will actually verbalise it in reality.
It’s human nature and instinctual to size up other people on their appearance and to make a judgement on them, it’s been happening since time began, I’m sure initially to size up how much of a threat another person could possibly be

Depends. Not on how they look but on how they present themselves. That is a reflection on how they feel about themselves etc and if they don't look after themselves, their health hygiene, weight extremes, how can they look after others etc.

That poor woman. I can't imagine the internal battle she had with herself to even change into a swimsuit and brave the pool - because of people like you.

I for one hope she feels really proud of herself for going, rather than ashamed, judged and stared at like some fucking freak show.

Shame on you.

I'm not bothered about weight, but I do expect people to dress up a bit for a job interview, even if that means clean jeans and t-shirt, rather than a tailored wool suit and silk shirt. What I've worn to interviews (of which I've had a few in the last 18 months,) has been slightly smarter than I actually wesr to work, because I want to make a good impression. I would avoid wearing stained clothes at any time, but sometimes, drinks spill, birds shit on you in the steet, that sort of thing, and you haven't time to change, and the chances of that happening seem to be exponentially higher when you're about to step into an interview.

I do work that is mainly office based, but even if I didn't - I grew up on a farm, so a suit probably isn't appropriate, but overalls when you've come from being literally knee-deep in pig shit isn'tright for an interview, either - I would expect people to take the potential job seriously, and at least aim for clean clothes, shoes and brushing their hair. In most jobs, you are presenting a particular face to that world, so I don't show all the aspects of me I would show if out on a date, just as I don't go into technical details about my job role on a date. And my family get a pretty sanitised version of my dating life... we don't show all of ourselves all of the time to all people, and dressing cleanly and appropriately is part of showing you understand that. And clothing is something you can change. There are charities which help with clothing for people who are referred from the job centre.

All the teachers in the 80s were appallingly unkempt. Stank of fags and coffee, crumpled clothing, food in beards etc.

As for being overweight, why would that stop someone being a good teacher? I wouldn't care what weight they were. Not that I've ever seen a morbidly obese teacher. You have to be on your feet all day.

Stained hoody to a job interview is obviously a no no. But as long as the person doesn't have BO then I don't really care what they look like day to day. As long as they are polite and do their job well.

so you worked for 20 years in women’s fashion, worked at a care home and now work for a funeral director which is a very varied employment history, that’s great. What you’re saying here doesn’t quite tally with your comment on a different post, berating the youths of today for being clones of one another instead of being individual and embracing different styles. You say you were a teddy boy but if you were a girl you would have been a rock chick definitely but you still feel comfortable making judgements based on the trousers someone would wear to their own mothers funeral? You sound pretty inconsistent.

All the teachers in the 80s were appallingly unkempt. Stank of fags and coffee, crumpled clothing, food in beards etc.

Clearly not true. Sounds like something you'd read in a tabloid.

YABNU about dirty clothing.
YABU. Generally overweight
YANBU If morbidly obese

I would walk like that if I didn't use a wheelchair. I've won awards for my teaching. Unfortunately only 1.6% of teachers are disabled. Perhaps there would be more of us if the attitudes of the person you quoted were less hateful.