To ask how often you’re complimented on your looks

[LeopardPrintShorts]

In particular by people you've just met. Have been out with a very pretty friend who has had men fawning over her/complimenting her whilst I was just ignored as usual. I don't think my physical appearance has ever been complimented by a stranger. Feeling a bit crap. Does this happen to other people?

I got what I think was the first random compliment I can ever remember about how I was looking in really good shape at the gym a couple of weeks ago. It may have been more to do with the nice new gym gear I was wearing instead of my previous tatty kit that had lost all of its shape.

I've noticed is that wearing glasses makes me invisible to men. When I wear contact lenses I get more looks and attention out in public.

Literally never, but I have always been ugly, lol. You don't miss what you've never had.

Edit: the only comment I've had on my looks was actually a couple of months ago where a random young man on the street walked passed me and said to me "you look pretty... ugly" and his mate laughed at the comment. I was too surprised to say anything as my looks mean I'm usually invisible rather than actively standing out for my ugliness.

Quite often in my youth but that was a while ago!
I absolutely agree with @Zinnialime statement though - pointedly so.

Pretty often. I know how to graciously take a compliment, but I don't really appreciate people commenting on it too much. I feel like people don't notice my personality as much, which makes me feel invisible.

I'm in my 40s and it still hasn't stopped. I do look a bit younger but that's just big eyes and my facial structure, as well as being toned and petite. But that's one I get a lot these days - getting told I'm looking good for it.

It really is a double edged sword though, as I say. I have an annoying stalker at the moment.

Lots when younger (mostly by creepy men on the street) but times have changed and I think it would be impolite to do it now. Certainly if someone in work told me I looked beautiful I’d think they were a bit sleazy. I asked my DP if he ever complimented someone on their appearance at work and he said, ‘Fuck no. That’d be weird’.

How does it work then, when a stranger comes up to you to tell you you're beautiful or attractive?

Do they shuffle along and sidle up, saying "I just had to tell you how beautiful you are."
That doesn't have the ring of truth to me AT ALL.

I am very good looking and always well groomed-that's just a fact- and never have I had a stranger come up to me with the sole aim of commenting on my looks-never.

My friends and husband have known me for years, so I don't startle them with my beauty every time I appear-they don't fall down in raptures-in much the same way that if you live in Venice, you just go about your business, not stopping to rhapsodise!

I simply don't believe strangers tell posters they are lovely-unless they're very young and that person is trying to pick them up-and I don't believe that friends and family go around in awe of the good looks of someone that they know.

So, if you don't have people remarking on your looks regularly, read this thread and think that must be because you are plain-it's not. It doesn't happen to anyone and I say this confidently.

When I put a nice dress on I get quite a lot of compliments from mainly people I work with. The kids I teach always notice a new dress and are quick to compliment it, ask for a twirl etc. Luckily, they are too nice to say anything when I look rough as hell.

So, if you don't have people remarking on your looks regularly, read this thread and think that must be because you are plain-it's not. It doesn't happen to anyone and I say this confidently

I get compliments on my looks quite regularly. From women I don’t know. I teach gym classes.

They're hardly strangers then are they @User19876536484 and they have a vested interest in giving you a compliment/

When was the last time you were shuffling along in the Waitrose fruit and veg aisle and a complete stranger came up to and declared that you were a Madonna Amongst the Carrots?

Same here. I wonder where people live that they get compliments (from strangers?) on a daily basis.
I’ve spent some time in southern Europe in my twenties, it was more common there. Mostly compliments from men, and not always very sophisticated.
Nowadays, I occasionally get compliments from friends and colleagues, mostly on outfits, and I also compliment others.
I just can’t quite envision people getting compliments from total strangers daily. That said, it reminds me of a gentleman I saw on the bus once, probably in his 60s and wearing quite a flamboyant and elaborate outfit. A younger woman complimented on his style and he seemed genuinely flattered, that was lovely to witness 🙂

They are to me. I don’t know them. What vested interest do they have?

I shop in Aldi.

Do Aldi not have a fruit and veg aisle? If they do, linger by the carrots and report back-preferably with a picture!

I note that your confidence has now been reduced to specifically supermarket fruit and veg aisles.

OMG that is so bloody rude. You'll have to think of some good comebacks.
I got lots of unwanted compliments when I was young but now I'm 63 and have lost my looks I am invisible. I can't say I'm bothered.
My patients (I'm a podiatrist) often remark that I would be so much more attractive if I wasn't so fat 😂

You're a very literal person aren't you.

Have you ever that that your comprehension skills might be a factor in all these compliments you think you're receiving?

Have a good day in which ever aisle of whichever supermarket you wish to linger in. 😍

I live in the North, I’m Chinese but born in England so culturally I can slip in to either side.

I am still complimented and quite often by both men and women. With women they want to know how I stay slim and mainly my skin care regime. With men it’s very much not that, sometimes it’s polite like the old chap that said let me get the door for such a beautiful woman and with others it’s less polite. I’m not even that young anymore.

There was a Chinese woman comedian who joked about Asian women being very much at a Hello Kitty stage and then suddenly almost overnight they are Yoda. So not yet Yoda I guess. I have a Classical Chinese look and not a spoon face as my Mother would say. They are brutally honest about looks, being fat is a complete no. When I went to the last family wedding in 2019 I felt like the fat Auntie at a size 8 to 10.

I do not live in a culturally diverse area so stand out. There was myself and then Helen who runs the local Chinese takeaway who had kids in the local school, that was it. A few more ethnic minorities over the last decade but still so few if out I could count them on one hand having passed dozens of people in town.

I'm 60 and still get the odd comment - at my daughters baby shower last year one of the young women I'd not met before told me I was extraordinarily beautiful- she had been drinking but it made my year

Thank You. Sorry to have dented your confidence.

You have obviously never spent any time with Americans. They definitely do do this. I once had a police woman randomly tell me I looked beautiful in New York when I asked her for directions - cannot image a police woman here saying that!
On holiday a man approached my DH to congratulate him on how attractive his wife was! That was weird. DH laughed and said "tell her not me". So no, it has never happened to me with strangers in the UK but good old US of A? Definitely!

If you are attractive you get complimented. If you are not, you don't.
Simple as that.

The don't just siddle up, they use any excuse to try to get you to engage, then start with the bullshit. Me and a relative were Ursula Andress/Monroe type looking. My DH was dying (he had progressive cancer), we were outside of the hospital. A man came out of his way to 'bump' into my relative and after saying sorry, he went on about how stunning she was. When we asked, can he leave us alone, because of the situation, he said 'oh well, you are both still looking good though'. I'd had weeks of these dickheads. Those starting with the 'smile it will never happen', even after replying 'it is happening, my husband is dying upstairs', they'd continue with how I looked. I've been followed, I've had a stalker. I've had men, around Christmas (without knowing them or particularly talking to them) come into my workplace and give me a Ann Summers catalogue and money, to buy myself something. Luckily we had good male friends in our local pubs, to help shut down harrasment. You are wrong in your confidence. Likewise when the same dickheads want to put down other women, I've had the women's back. My middle DD has had the same.
Sexual harrasment, public critiquing, isn't a compliment. It devalues your worth as a person. I was just something to fuck, even standing in a hospital. It isn't fun, especially when you are with children.

It stopped around 44.

Thank you!

No, it's hard to dent the confidence of a woman who doesn't need to make up tales on a message board about strangers complimenting her on her beauty either for the purposes of self aggrandizement or to make other women feel like shit.

The anecdote is usually followed by some self depreciating transparent comment eg...it made me feel awful, it made me feel like meat, it might just be because I'm a cute 3 foot tall! That is done to try and add a ring of truth, an 'I'm not boasting' vibe.

If compliments are given, it's often to make someone feel a bit better about themselves-they look in need of it. It goes like, " Ahh, poor thing. I told her she looked beautiful. She was made up." I've done that myself-it's a good deed.

As I say, I am conventionally extremely good looking. Strangers don't sidle up to me and I say that to all the posters on here who haven't had had it either and who therefore think that they must be plain. You aren't. Don't swallow these tales whole and use as a stick to beat yourself with.

Before reading these threads-and @User19876536484 we were talking about supermarkets earlier-may I suggest that posters also hop into the condiment aisle and buy a big box of salt before reading these threads.

Anyway, I'm off to have a facial.Afterwards, I shall carry a parasol to defend myself against all the strangers who will rush to tell me how beautiful I am!

I used to get comments in my twenties, they dwindled in my early thirties and now they have completely stopped now I'm two kids down and 38 the only thing I regret is not appreciating my youthful looks!

That’s interesting - I had a friend from New York (she used to live in Brooklyn) who said it was very common there to compliment on other people’s outfits, shoes and so on.
That was about five years ago, I wonder if it’s changed.