Gave Granddaughter's Mum £250 towards her 3rd birthday party

[TheBuffetInspector]

She couldn't decide which nursery friends to invite. Whether it would be 360 or local Wacky.

I gave her £250 towards either.

She's going to Sea-Life Centre with her Mum.

So, not only no party. No invite either.

I'm a bit pissed off to be honest.

Don't worry about feeling sorry for my DG. She's bright, she's funny, she has a family that loves her and a wonderful Mum and Dad. She loves both dearly.

She's very settled and happy considering what she has been through in her little life.

Maybe she's buying your granddaughter an octopus at the Sea Life Centre.

It is young. I had mine at 21 and 33 so spanned the age differences. Looking back to being 21 though... Very young.

I have a crazy feeling that @Pickedupsomethingsuss knows OP in real life.

OP she should give you your money back, and your don needs to get any job to support his DC.

Eyebrows and lip fillers are totally irrelevant when it comes to GC mum.

Don't!

Now I've just thought of that Octopus film, My Friend the Octopus Teacher (or something) 😭

Will it predict football scores? Ah an investment octopus!

No, way off the mark in too many ways. They just went through all my previous posts.

Which must have been fun.

All asking for the money back at this stage would do is cause bad feeling. Potentially it did go on things that DGC needed at the time. Maybe mum spent it towards new shoes/food shopping, and meant to get the money back together for a party and then couldn't.

I'm not saying it makes it right, but as a single young mum not working then money margins will be tight. Whose to say she blew it on a night out or lip fillers.

They don't work to provide for her OP. They aren't wonderful.

And while it might seem like your dgd is happy and bright, the example she is being set is woeful. Parents on benefits, with mummy conning gran out of 250 for a fake party...

Her future will really be limited unless the parents step up and properly provide for her, set good examples and stop expecting everyone else to pay for their life choices.

Anyway MAFS back after ads 🤣

OP what she has done is bad!
I would accept that she is short and tells you and swaps the party for day out WITH YOU TOO! But just taking the money, and not inviting you! That is shite!
You will have a great time with your DGD! Spoil her with that picnic. 💐💐💐💐

Thank you for your input.

You gave her the money out of love for your granddaughter. What her mother did is awful, just saw it as free money . She knows she took you for a mug but you have the satisfaction of knowing that you did a kind and generous thing . She might come out on the attack but it doesn’t change the facts- she took your money for her daughter and didn’t spend it on her. Karma will get her

This could be the case, but the mother should tell OP. Be open about it. And take OP on the outing, to celebrate her DGD. Me thinks...

We will. We're lucky enough to have a beautiful huge park close by, 2 lakes, massive play area... It'll be fun!

I would be very pissed off too. But you gave it to her months ago for her birthday party , perhaps she said she wanted to go to this place so she used that money to take her, go to the restaurant inside, bought her those expensive souvenir toys there and spent a quality birthday with her treating her exactly how she wanted .
Does it really matter that it wasn't a "party" ?

I would just let it go, you won’t get the money back but you won’t fall for that again. Your bond with your gd is more important than money and her feeling loved and special is priceless x

And the child's mother should also get a job?

Or are jobs only for men?

Seriously what nonsense am I reading here today 😂

Mothers are equally responsible as fathers in housing and providing for their children everyone!
Should not have to spell that out....

That honestly disgusting. I would only choose to spend money on my granddaughter directly.

I feel your pain. So many times my Step Son's were happy to take money off me for cars, IVF treatment, holidays (yep paid for them all to go to Ibiza).. their Dad (my now ExH) didnt work so it was my earnings and savings. Now they don't talk to me or want me to see my ex-step-children. It hurts more than I can say but I won't lose sleep over it, they will realise now how tight their Dad is and I did what I thought was right at the time. The fact that I had a tiff with my SS at the end of the holiday (me sticking up for my DS, his brother) because he was being a man-child and not even getting a thank you at the end of it also stung but I am the better person for it. Live and learn!

She's definitely spent some on Botox. £250 is nothing to the young and spoilt these days is it? Write it off this time, but never do it again. Wait till you have her, and then spoil her.

You tried to do a nice thing and got taken advantage of. That really sucks, but I’m sure you’ve learned a lesson and will not make that mistake again. In situations like this you have to play the long game. A three year old won’t notice much, but as she gets older she will notice if her mum is spending money on lip fillers while claiming she can’t afford to give her child a party. Just sit quietly in the background being reliable and supportive, she will know where to come when she’s older.

Teens is young, 20s and early 30s is normal, then there are older mums. The point is that this is the mum’s personality. It’s nothing to do with age. It’s embarrassing that OP’s son is nearly 30 and unemployed.

If only there was a way that adult men could avoid having babies with teenage girls. The OP wouldn't be in her situation either.

The OP's GC Mum was a teen when the OPs adult son impregnated her. It isn't right that no offer of money back was forthcoming. But it was sensible that considering both parents aren't working, it was decided that a party, wasn't the best use of money.

The woman is looking after the child who is not yet at school. The father isn't so has all the time in the world to get a job. Days, afters, nights are all.options he can take up.