To feel miffed with my neighbours request?

[Aliceglass]

I don’t know if I’m being sensitive or unreasonable here. My next door neighbour approached me at the weekend to give me dates of their summer garden parties.

For context, We live in a terrace of modern houses and we all have similar sized gardens, enclosed by neighbouring gardens, back and side.

So my neighbour told me about her planned garden parties over the next few months and there were 3 dates confirmed, 2 tbc.

But, she has specifically asked us that we don’t use our garden during the days of these parties.

I was a little take aback and said that we don’t have any scheduled bbqs or parties on those dates so they will be fine. But she said they didn’t want us to use our garden, AT ALL!
Apparently it will spoil the atmosphere if I was to “pop to the bins and empty my recycling” or if they could hear the washing machine on a spin if I left the back door open!

I did laugh at this stage and say well I can’t promise to not access my garden for the whole day.

She went on to say how her friends are “well to do” and they would expect privacy and not to be interrupted by unnecessary noise.

I got a little frustrated at this point and I asked if she was just letting me know or if the neighbours the other side were also being asked this. She assured me that, yes they were and they confirmed they won’t be using their garden or the gate to their garden at the back so as to not disturb her.

Am I being unreasonable to think that this request is unusually controlling?

I always thought Buckingham Palace was detached but maybe I’m wrong? WTF has multiple “ garden parties” which no one must tread near or, shock horror, open a bin. The woman’s mad.
I can think of some lovely “alternate” things you can hold in your garden on these special event days.

Haha I like your thinking!

This! As you can tell I’m terrible at confrontation so I think I’m going to use this idea!! Thank you x

I'll be there, i actually would come as well 🤣🤣 road trip to cause chaos is just a normal family day for us. Do you have a stool for DS to stand on and look over the fence, he LOVES a captive audience to talk all about animals and the environmentel inpact on sea creatures. You know, i think you can hire a bog standard bouncy castle for about £50...

course this happened

I’d be organising the tackiest party I could and making sure DH and I channelled Onslow and Daisy from keeping up appearances

This thread has so much potential for the Mumsnet of ye olden days and the festival held after someone refused to move their horses from a field and MNer bought because they had always used it.

You need to go full Wayne and Waynetta slob on those days and use your garden as loudly as possible. Who does she think she is??

RUDE!! Carry on with your life and use your garden when you like, not when she tells you you're allowed.
Of course I'm sure you wouldn't go out of your way to disrupt their party anyway. Very peculiar and cheeky request.

I think I can understand why!!

"Mrs. Bucket, we've bought some traps for the horrendous rat infestation, we have a lot spare you can have, I know they looove your shed! Shall bob drop them around"

Absolutely ridiculous. I’d tell her to get fucked.

@Aliceglass Do you want to borrow a posse of bonkers 2 yos... 3 mad springers, and a bouncy castle, clown performer and add in some 6 yos and a water fight?....
(Looking for somewhere to hold 2yo bday party and keep 6 yo entertained....)

@Aliceglass im just over the border in Lancashire if you are indeed in Yorkshire.

if you let me attend your Garden Party Interruption Event I can bring a tatty knackered patched up campervan and leave it on your front street outside her house for the day before and after her event. I will of course need to sleep in it and display my hand washed undies under the windscreen wipers to let the air dry.

I can exaggerate my northern accent and swear like a trooper and discuss dodgy political opinions at ‘don’t have an inside voice’ volume.

Will bring my own Richmond sausages, disposable barbecue (slightly damp and smoky) and a variety of Lidl offerings.

And as I said, it's a disingenuous question from a grown woman.

Oh my God, who does she think she is? 🤣

I would be hiring a bouncy castle, hog roast and karaoke machine and inviting the whole neighbourhood. End the afternoon with a bonfire.

I wonder how she will organise the parking for her garden parties? Were I the OP I would encourage all the neighbours to park on the street on those days if they usually park on drives.

"Mrs. Bucket, crackhead Steve said not to use the canapés he got for you, they were sat longer in the bin than he thought, he said he's got some laundry detergent for a quid to make it up to you"

My money is on it being a series of swinging parties.

Or, if you’re confident it isn’t.

Tell her that it clashes with your planned events. And that given hers sounds similar maybe could double up on some of them to add to the excitement.

If I've got my pet giraffe and got it lead trained by then, I'll pop round. He'll love looking over the fence! (If you know, you know!!)😂😂

Oh this made me laugh, literally just spoke to our lovely neighbours to let them know we are planning dd 18th and apologies in advance for 1 night of a bit of noise till midnight , and yes we will be in. She often goes to her dd at weekends so I have warned her in advance, party is in June. I plan wine and flowers after , and if she's in the garden that's fine. Obviously inshould have told her not to leave the house and be quiet!

To warn you of the dates for your convenience is one thing, to even request for you not to use your garden on those dates is CFery of the highest order.

But, probably unwittingly, she’s given you a shopping list of all the behaviours she won’t tolerate and the dates when to do ‘em!! Do your worst OP but be warned I think your neighbour has already aged worst neighbour award!

You need to find a hot tub and a trampoline to borrow.

Haha loving the suggestions, here are mine:

• Find a bunch of dogs with blocked anal glands and let them loose in your garden to bum-scoot about for a few hours..
• Have a shower in your bikini out back and have a good shave, claiming the inside shower isn't working. Make sure to give them all a good wave and a merry chuckle, flinging some shaving foam over the fence accidentally.
• Invite lots of people round for a swingball tournament, but make sure it's really serious (like Wimbledon) and each player MUST make loud, almost sexual grunts every time they hit the ball.
• Hang your grottiest undies, or your sexiest, out to dry on the Juliet balcony

Christ your neighbour is charming isn't she?!!

Now you have the dates for her little garden parties, I would do the following:

*Walk round all day in your scruffiest clothes, drinking, belching and randomly bursting into song.

*Have an all day, very smoky, BBQ

*Buy loads of alcohol

*Invite lots of friends and family around to drink above alcohol

*When alcohol has been consumed, stand on a box and strike up a conversation
with your neighbours snobby friends over the fence. If you have more than one
box, encourage friends and family to do the same.

*If boxes are unavailable, try lifting up a fence panel instead

*Set up a big paddling pool

*Invite every child you know to play in the above paddling pool

*Have a water fight with extremely large water guns (being careful to not let water go over the fence into your neighbour's garden) 😜

*Have a load of manure delivered for your garden

*Arrange for your drive to be jet washed after above manure has been moved

*Book a window cleaner (a very slow one, preferably)

*Arrange a visit from the Jehova's witnesses for your neighbour

*Play any music that your neighbour will not like

That's just for starters. God I would have a field day if my neighbour gave these orders to me! 😂