To wonder how you avoid afterschool park with 5 year old?

[SoImStillInBed]

Hi,

I'm curious about something. We walk past the park on the way home. Except for his afterschool club days x1 and one club afternoon x1 he'll always want to go to the park especially if any friend might be going - hes friends with the whole class. In a way this is good. But sometimes I'd just prefer we collect his sister from nursery, he doesn't eat a tonne of biscuits someone has brought and he does his home things like lego, reading etc..

I notice some kids rarely or never go. What are you doing? How have you persuaded their kids to go straight home without any argument?

YABU - this is easy or obvious
YANBU - it's a struggle

Well it's not 2. It's like a whole tonne of sugary stuff that affects his mood and generally undermines attempts at healthy eating etc. Yes fine occasionally like birthday parties.

You can stop him eating a whole tonne, though……… yes, ds, you can have two biscuits but no more as you’ll be having dinner when you get home.

What about setting a weekly routine? Monday is after school club, Tuesday is park day, Wednesday is hobby and Thursday and Friday are straight home to do xyz.

and for park days turn up with a snack you find more acceptable and say that they aren’t having the biscuits etc.

it’s such a short time in their life they want to go play and as annoying as it is sometimes, I really try and say yes to as much park time as possible as one day, they will just stop and I will be sad that it’s all over

That sounds really odd. Why was she sad they’d given up asking for something she never allowed?

I have this. I decide a day that works (usually Friday) and at the beginning of the week when asked I tell him 'yes, we can go on Friday as long as you don't sulk that we can't go today' or whatever.

The best solution would be what a poster suggested upthread and let him go with another parent, pick up other child and when you're back it's time to go.

You either take him as that is what he needs to do, run around and climb. Some children dont have that much interest or need to do so.
You are building his body while he is growing and the habit of exercising and moving around.
If you are worried about food, take food with you and dont let him take buiscuits from other people.

That sounds really odd. Why was she sad they’d given up asking for something she never allowed?
Probably did some self reflection and realised that time moves on. One day will be the last day they will want to go to the park. The trouble is you don't know which day it will be and you won't have your chance to go again and have that final good moment.

You behave like a parent and state: we will go to the park on Friday if you have been good all week. And you say no to sweets because you have already packed a healthy snack. You’re the adult. Only your rules matter, not what other parents choose to do with their kids.

Hi,

Thanks everyone for answering. I think I'll leave it here.

Some really helpful answers about a routine.

I think some people really need to calm down and direct your anger towards the real baddies in society rather than people like me who don't start their OP posts with... I can say no and I like biscuits.

Yes I say no to my child over things. I'm mainly interested in what others are actually doing and saying when you're not going to the park and the routine tip was helpful.

I'm not averse to ever going to the park and love the nice points about how its a lovely thing. Mainly my baby's nursery is somewhere else and sometimes I want to collect her early. It's also tricky when everyone brings sugary crap. You can say oh tell him only have 2 etc but kids share with him, parents are off with u if you put any kind of restrictions on. And I do have housework to do.

Have a nice weekend :)

Precisely. Baffling that she’d waited until she thought they’d stopped wanting to, and then got all maudlin about missed opportunities.

Just how many biscuits are being stuffed into these children?
Seriously? And other parents taking umbrage if any child refuses?

Hard to believe.

Just say no?

We have a park outside our house and while I let them out as much as I can, sometimes it's a no. And that's that.

lol. Are you going to try and say that dick comment isnt dismissive or unhelpful either?

good, because It seems like your immediate response in anyones post that you answer, is to immediately write something smug and superior that puts people down. I wonder if its a lack of empathy for you and you really dont get other peoples nuances, or is it on purpose to try and make people feel worse when they are reaching out for support? Maybe it gives you a kick?

Like calling someone silly and hyperbolic for literally expanding on questions about HER OWN THREAD.

Because it's incredibly boring?

Yes you do it a couple of times a week, but every day?

No. <shudder>

but what is your reason for following the thread, just to try and shut the OP down?
Whats your goal here?

Its not as if youre trying to offer genuine advice.

Theres not a single thread that youve answered in your whole time on mumsnet that hasnt been smug and kindy cunty. I wondered if it was an active choice you were making for the benefit of the internet, or whether its an unfortunate personality trait that you still need to work on?

im being dismissive of people who are dismissive??

Thats so meta

Honestly, I could never say no to the park unless there was a really good reason we needed to get home so I have no good advice on that OP. I always gave in. The park was right next to their primary and always full of kids after school.

I don't regret it though because they are 12 and 14 now and go to the park with their friends. I miss those days at the park when they were little watching them having fun with their friends.