This dad who’s always carrying his reception aged DD

[isithey]

It is really cute, however gives my DD ideas of being carried too and I just can’t !

there is quite a walk from the car park to the classroom at my DDs school and this one dad ALWAYS carries his DD the whole way there and the whole way back.

wherever my DD sees this, she wants to be carried too ! But she’s absolutely huge. She’s only 5 but already bigger than the average 6 year old. The little girl being carried is much, much smaller than my DD.

I can barely carry her anymore.

when do people generally stop carrying their kids ?

I occasionally carry my 3 year old, but not a lot. I enjoy it, I must admit. So I do get why this dad does it. Super cute.

how long did you carry your kid around ?

I mean not after about 3 unless absolutely necessary. He’s not doing her any favours - kids need exercise

Such misery on this thread. I have very fond memories of being on my Dad's shoulders as a child, and I'm 39 now. My DH regularly puts DD9 and DD6 on his shoulders - not at the same time though! I still occasionally carry DD6 if she asks - she's tiny.

Life would be bloody miserable if we only attended to children's basic needs and nothing more. No, they don't NEED carrying. No, they don't NEED you to carry their book bag so they can run off with their friends. But if it gives them a little happiness, and you're physically capable, why on earth wouldn't you?

This - it’s a simple act that makes a child and/or parent happy. A bit of joy in the world.

Kids generally love being picked up. It’s a bit of fun and happiness.

Ah c’mon now it’s a few yards to a car. It might be just their way of affection after a school day. It could hardly be described as exercise.

My youngest dd was always on the 99th centile. I am 5ft tall.
18 months I reckon

Unless the child has SEN I find that a bit weird and smothering. You can baby your kids too much. Our kids are both small and could easily be carried, but by the time DD was 4 we were telling her no, she needs to build up her leg strength and walk. If she's sick, hurt or we unexpectedly have to walk much farther than usual, we will carry her a short distance but not often.

I think there’s a difference between occasionally going on dad’s shoulders (as my 5 year old does) and dad carrying you to and from school every day.

I think the culture of parenting now is to be submissive, and to do anything your child asks unless you have a very good reason not to because ‘why wouldn’t you want to make them happy?’. Of course I want my kids to be happy, but like I said I’ve noticed this culture often leads to anxious, sad or vulnerable-acting children as they realise it’s a way of instantly being babied and having your every need pandered to. Which in turn makes them not very nice to be around. Half the girls in DD class at school seem so fragile and unhappy all the time, constantly needing ‘snuggles’ and check ins from mum and dad.

I stopped once mine began to walk at a year and a half.

This screams to me 'how can I make how other people parent about me' why on earth does it matter?

My son is 7 and I can't carry him for longer than 2 minutes now but a piggy back I could for much longer. I look for any excuse though because I know he'll be my only 🙈

I don’t know, I don’t have a girl in school so I can’t comment.

I think it’s a huge jump from a story about a
man carrying a child to a car.

And do you know what, that is ok!

It’s actually ok to parent your own children however you choose to when it comes to such things.

For an every day short walk, that’s ridiculous. At the end of a long family walk, fair enough to give a 5yo a piggy back or whatever. Basically, if they can walk, they should.

Don't let it worry you because it's absolutely none of your business.

Worry about your own life.

One day without even knowing it at the time it will be the last time you carry them. Carry them if you want to, say no if you don't, there's no right and no wrong just desire and ability.

Oh, it doesn't inasmuch as I don't think about it on day-to-day basis

But if I see it I don't like it

(I was responding to someone it did worry)

My 5 year old doesn’t get carried unless absolutely necessary.
My 3 (almost 4) year old gets carried fucking everywhere. She is autistic and has 0 impulse control. She looks normal until suddenly she’s running into traffic. My body is broken from carrying her everywhere. 🤷‍♀️

It doesn't matter what other people do. It's a good time to start the conversation that different people do different things

I just followed the advice of my eldest’s physiotherapist. My son’s bag seemed pretty heavy with football boots, books and water bottle. I never weighed it though.

Both of mine are now independent, resilient, sporty teens with no back issues.

The heavier they get, the less I carry them. Can manage a little bit, and the bit varies to how much energy or how much backpain or kneepain I have. I try to carry them when they ask. They are only little for a short period of time.

I think it looks ridiculous carrying a child past about age 3/4. Why baby them? It doesn't look"super cute".Far from it. A parent should be encouraging their dc ti to walk to school. It makes me cringe when you see a parent struggling to hold a 6 year old on their hip while the child's legs are nearly touching the floor. I'd say shoulder rides okay up to about age 8.

That’s your issue surely? Why do you waste mental space thinking about how other people parent? You know nothing about their lives or their children’s.

This 100%.

MNs is rife with booting toddlers out of buggies at 2 etc etc.

I had to carry mine until year 1 as she hated school. It was carry in or no school. (Yes, we're at the end of secondary school with years of CAMHS and autism assessment waiting lists now).

I stopped being able to lift my DS when he was about 13. Massively annoys me I can't risk it anymore.

I have small children but minimised carrying from 2 and refuse except when really required from 4. I'm more strict with my second as I'm older and have injured myself lugging kids, folded prams and car seats about!

How about minding your own business? I carry my 9 year old, when he's not carried he's in a wheelchair. You don't know what's going on with that child, and frankly, you don't need to know. Parent your child the way you want and save the judgement for someone worthy of it.