Wanting to look good and be a 10/10 girl? Men specifically?

[ThisChic]

People always criticise others for caring about their looks, but let's face it, we all appreciate beauty and strive to look our best.

I feel as though most women can be seen as '10/10' if they have good hygiene and skin/make up, i.e the whitened teeth, hair extensions, glowy fake tan, slim and big breasts.

I feel like I have a few obvious flaws; small boobs is the main one, but also teeth and hair that could be 'glowed up'.

I see that 95% of the women on TikTok on Instagram with 100 - 500k followers are just slim, tanned women with big boobs. All different facial features, but heavily made up, thin and big boobs.

Am I being unreasonable to want to make myself look hotter by fixing my flaws?

I would make any decision for surgery for myself anyway, but I just wonder what peoples' thoughts are!

Why not have one of your breasts enlarged with silicone or whatever awful substance they use these days and then on dates you can ask which one they prefer and make a pie chart so that after six months you can see which one comes out top and either have the other breast enlarged or the implant taken out. 😕

#utternonsense

This is a really sad thread.

I just asked DP what initially attracted him to me (we met IRL at a hobby) and he said my laugh, my chin (I have a heart-shaped face so a bit of a pointy elfin chin!), my bum (which is enormous, thanks to southern European ancestry!) and the fact that I made him laugh.

Now that we’ve been together a while, he says my thoughtfulness, my sense of humor and the fact I’m a badass at my very high pressure job - as well as my chin and my bum - are attractive.

None of those things can be achieved externally. If you want to look a certain way for a certain aesthetic for YOU, then have at it. If you want men to objectively label you ‘hot’ unilaterally, just because they want to sleep with you, not because you’re trying to find a high value partner, then I guess that’s also fine. But if you’re looking for a relationship you need to focus on other things.

I have a big social and professional network and the women I know in happy relationships are kind, funny and intelligent. They’re all gorgeous in their own way but they’re all totally different. Different races, heights, dress sizes, wear or don’t wear make up, hair - everything.

I think other women, if that’s where you’re looking for approval, think that slim, stylish, understated women are attractive. Personally, I think the most beautiful women in the world are Helena Christensen, Susan Kelechi Watson, Lupita Nyong’o, Gwendoline Christie, Penelope Cruz and Gillian Anderson and none of them are a bit alike!

You want to look like everyone else on social media - in order to look like everyone else on social media. And any discrepancies between your looks and the typical social media hottie are somehow 'flaws'.

The main flaw you have is allowing your looks and your sense of self-worth to be defined by your fixation on social media.

This ^

I'd heard about the car exhaust thing, but not the pile of leaves. But it's apparently true! NSFW, #EveryDaysASchoolDay, etc.

https://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/drunk-drugged-up-man-tried-17176000

Just say no, kids.

Are you the poster on the sex board who doesn't believe that any men genuinely like small breasts, despite loads of men saying how much they like breasts big or small and everything in-between!

You read as though you are objectifying yourself. Men who like women as people see women as a whole. Men who see women as objects make judgements like you suggest.

That kind of '10/10' woman is an 'ideal' for a lot of men, but they also know it's a fantasy at the end of the day. Most are not expecting to actually have a relationship with a girl that looks like that and I wouldn't knock myself out to look that way for men because life's too bloody short. And I think most women feel that way and aren't bothered. They might think about looking attractive to men, and that's fine, but most know they don't need to go to that effort.

I used to have a boyfriend who said 'More than a handful is wasted'.

The kind of guy who goes for heavily made up girls with fake tan, and disproportionately big boobs on a slim body?

You are welcome to him my love.

Mine too 🤦🏼‍♀️

I used to have a boyfriend who said 'More than a handful is wasted'.

I worked a bar job with a lad who once drunkenly responded to a punter who said this. His response "you only need a mouthful".

Also most of the actual grown up, decent men I know.... don't love women wearing a lot of makeup. Stuff between them & your bare skin is an inconvenience really.

It’s never a one off thing. If you for example have breast implants, they will need to be replaced in 10 to 15 years and quite a lot of women get generalised illnesses with breast implants.
Beyond basic cleaning and bleaching of teeth, veneers need to be replaced and can often create problems.
However, I absolutely agree with maximising what you do have. I would ignore what you see on Instagram as most of them have filters on and look ridiculous. If you want to attract a man in the manner of Andrew Tate then knock yourself out.

OMG I thought your name said Fingeringthebottom! 😲🤭

That's it, I'm making that eye test appointment that I've been putting off, first thing tomorrow! 🤣

Quite. Don't regret deleting it 5 years ago.

Stop comparing yourself OP.

No one I know particularly likes or wants big boobs, so not sure why you’re focused on that. All I hear is that they hurt and make your clothes fit badly.

I can assure you not all men are after hair extensions and fake tan - both massive turn offs for my husband! I guess if you’re going for a certain fake kind of look then you carry on. That may be what the tik tok women look like but it’s probably not what your average man in the real world is after.

Small boobs are not “a flaw”. OMG is this where we are at in valuing ourselves as women in 2025?

As someone who is a 5 out of 10 on a fair to good day, I have never, to my recollection, failed in my adult life to get a guy I want (to date). And I always punch up. So why would I waste time and money trying to be 'perfect'. I like me the way I am, it doesn't break the bank and provided you have reasonably good people skills and actually ask for what you want, men are not fussy!

I think it was Charlie Brooker that said men can get turned on by a crude charcoal sketch of a single boob, so I wouldn't sweat it 👍

What happens when you get these inflated bosoms and lure the 'man of your dreams' which seems to be the only reason you want a set of Billy Bolt-ons and then God forbid you have cancer and have your breasts removed?

It sounds like you’ve spent way too much time on social media.

What's beautiful to one person isn't to another. We're all different and everyone has different likes and desires.

Do whatever makes you happy, as long as you're doing it for yourself that's all that matters. Confidence radiates beauty.

@ThisChic I've tried to coin a reply, but am stumped. It's a rare occurrence. The sort of woman you describe is not the sort of girl men with an intellect generally look twice at and rarely for keeps.

DS's wife isn't that type, neither is DD. Both are natural girls who nurture their brains.