Wanting to look good and be a 10/10 girl? Men specifically?

[ThisChic]

People always criticise others for caring about their looks, but let's face it, we all appreciate beauty and strive to look our best.

I feel as though most women can be seen as '10/10' if they have good hygiene and skin/make up, i.e the whitened teeth, hair extensions, glowy fake tan, slim and big breasts.

I feel like I have a few obvious flaws; small boobs is the main one, but also teeth and hair that could be 'glowed up'.

I see that 95% of the women on TikTok on Instagram with 100 - 500k followers are just slim, tanned women with big boobs. All different facial features, but heavily made up, thin and big boobs.

Am I being unreasonable to want to make myself look hotter by fixing my flaws?

I would make any decision for surgery for myself anyway, but I just wonder what peoples' thoughts are!

By 'right men' I just mean nice men - kind, educated, loyal, etc etc. Those men can still prefer big boobs!

I have small boobs and it’s never had any impact on my life. Never stopped me feeling attractive, getting a boyfriend, wearing nice clothes…….

One person (jealous work colleague) once said to me “Your boobs are really small aren’t they?”

I just looked at her like the weirdo she was.

I have always been slim and would look odd with big boobs.

On the other hand, I wish I had slim ankles. Can’t wear beautiful, strappy shoes. No one else has ever seemed to notice or ever commented on it

I just can’t work out why you don’t want to be loved, or found attractive, for you. With the boobs you have.

It’s equal parts sad and confusing.

@PatsFruitCake ..... (a man) who values a certain size of breast over all the other things I am.

That isn't what I mean though. A man preferring larger breasts doesn't mean he values that over "everything else" a woman is? But it is nice to be physically attractive, which is what I want to be. It doesn't mean that it's all of peoples' value.

Yes and I am sure some do but not all of them. Not all nice right men will want that.

So really what makes you think you aren’t attractive now and need to change the way you look?

@SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius You are so much more than just your boobs, figure and lips - your intellect and character will always be valuable and special, whereas if you base your value mainly on your looks, when those change with age, what’s left?

Of course everyone's value as a human does not lie in their appearance. Nobody sane believes that and that isn't what I've said on this thread.

But when it comes to physical relationships, men (and women) do want an attractive partner, especially men as they are more visual overall. No man wants to sleep with a woman he doesn't fancy. Sure some might do it, but it isn't what they really like.

All I want is for a boyfriend to actually find me sexy, and not just, 'hmm she's ok'.

I'm a woman who hates her small breasts. I posted on here for mens' opinions.

I just want to experience being desired and wanted, and not being (physically) a disappointment (to a nice man) because of my chest. Why does that make me vacuous?

@ThisChic
I'm assuming by this comment that you've never experienced being desired and wanted by a man, and for some reason, presumably because you haven't known many(any?) men, you've fixated on the reason for that being the size of your breasts.
It's sad that you're so wrong, a nice man who has ended up in the situation where he desires and wants you is not going to be disappointed by your breasts.
It makes you sound vacuous because you keep going on about your physical attributes as if that's the only thing of worth to a man, which is utterly ridiculous, and makes you sound as if you think of yourself as some kind of blow up doll with no value other than appearance.

Just the prevalence and number of followers of women with large breasts on TikTok/Instagram and all of the hype that busty women seem to get in our society. It's like that's the 'ideal' for men....And I'd rather look ideal than not if possible.

OP, trends change constantly. What will you do when men like the curvy girl again? Or the sporty flat chested body?? Will you change yourself again??

I can see where you're coming from. I don't think I'm just 'flesh', I just want to look beautiful/sexy for the sake of it if I can, and to be desired, because I think most of us want that if we can have it.

I'm assuming by this comment that you've never experienced being desired and wanted by a man, and for some reason, presumably because you haven't known many(any?) men

I have...I've lived in a few different countries for work, and I've always been approached/asked out, and I've had a few short term boyfriends, one slightly longer term. But I have this thing where I just feel like I must be being 'settled' for because of my chest, and that men really don't like it but will just put up with it for some reason.....So I kind of just want to look sexy and be adored and not settled for.

I think this is your fixation and bias rather than anything else. You see this as the reason you aren’t seen as sexy but truthfully that is confidence and self belief.

fix the inside before changing the outside because changing the outside is unlikely to fix the inside issue

I don’t think it’s bizarre for a young woman to want to look attractive. It’s the language you use and the view you have of women that makes it obvious you aren’t one and know little to absolutely nothing about them. No woman talks or thinks in the way that you’re writing. It’s all incel speak.

Men never really like flat chested (if you want to call small breasted women that, I hate that term) women....It's been in fashion at certain points (1920s, 1960s, 90s Heroin Chic), but that's fashion, not what men like/fancy.

There are going to be men out there who don’t like big boobs, or prefer a flat bum etc etc. changing yourself to appeal to what you think men want my actually be a negative thing if the man you would actually want doesn’t like that look anyway.

I get wanting to be attractive but I think perhaps changing yourself to look like someone who probably uses filters isn’t the best idea. I remember when extremely thin was in, then it wasn’t and now it’s muscular and sporty (I think, can’t keep up). I’ve been chucked on a bed a few times and I definitely don’t have big boobs or a perfect smile. Not one single man has ever mentioned my boob size. I don’t think men are as picky as you think they are.

A lot of men I’ve found deeply desirable would never have been on the cover of a magazine.

Makes it obvious that I'm not one? I am a woman... What 'view' do you think I have of women? I just want to look good. I am not saying that women's sole value is in their appearance. Not at all.

I know that 'Incels' rate women out of 10, but so do other men....

Yes I agree. It's aff your mental health.
Delete all the apps and live in the real world. Walk into a supermarket and find one person who looks like you described. Hard pushed to find even 1. It's totally fantasy.
And think about the you tubers and influencers who are stunning. Suicide and depression/addictions galore.
The whole of that side of modern life is pretty dark in my opinion.
Just be your beautiful self and be a nice person. Think about being kind to others. That will make you a million more times more beautiful than lip fillers, fake boobs and hair extensions.

All men are different. My ex disliked big boobs. He much preferred small breasts. Some men find small boobs sexy.

Why is what men like (or what you think they like) the most important thing for you?

Who says? And who is putting the idea that all men like the same thing?

this is your issue and your fixation and it is a worrying one at that that somehow this will make everything ok because it eint

I honestly think you need some therapy of some kind. I'm sure no one was 'settling' with you because of your boobs. Even if he was, that's a good thing surely, that your other attributes outweigh your lack of boobs?

Personally I'd rather someone loved me enough that they'd overlook <whatever> about me.

They're asking for it? That's what you mean there isn't it?

Poor men cant help but catcall or grope women when they dress 'like that'. No man on the history of men has ever sexually harassed a respectable woman. But if those skanky women are flaunting their bits then they're asking for it.

Page one of the incel handbook.

I honestly don’t think men are exclusively attracted to boobs with a woman just randomly attached to them. May as well say “men only like women who are 5ft 8 so I’m going to have my legs broken and lengthened to meet this random belief I have that all men like 5ft 8 women.”

Wanting to look good to feel good is fine. Wanting to appeal to men's wide ranging and constantly changing requirements is unhealthy.