Wanting to look good and be a 10/10 girl? Men specifically?

[ThisChic]

People always criticise others for caring about their looks, but let's face it, we all appreciate beauty and strive to look our best.

I feel as though most women can be seen as '10/10' if they have good hygiene and skin/make up, i.e the whitened teeth, hair extensions, glowy fake tan, slim and big breasts.

I feel like I have a few obvious flaws; small boobs is the main one, but also teeth and hair that could be 'glowed up'.

I see that 95% of the women on TikTok on Instagram with 100 - 500k followers are just slim, tanned women with big boobs. All different facial features, but heavily made up, thin and big boobs.

Am I being unreasonable to want to make myself look hotter by fixing my flaws?

I would make any decision for surgery for myself anyway, but I just wonder what peoples' thoughts are!

I’m sure the poster didn’t mean that. Big boobs are seen as desirable and preferable, you know this! 😅🙂

Harvey Elliot - she loves him and I don’t get the appeal! She is quite short though so her ideal is a shorter man (Tom Holland is her other one).

Sydney Sweeney is one who has clearly also had work to try fit a mould! But there is the thing even though most would say she is objectively attractive not everyone would find her attractive and certainly not everyone would give her a 10/10. Blonde white isn’t for everyone

As the owner of a pair of B cup breasts, I'd rather been seen as attractive for who I am as a whole. I'm not interested in the kind of man who values a certain size of breast over all the other things I am.

I don't understand how how can't see your attitude is unhealthy. If you don't value all that you are then the men you attract won't either.

Yes, I am a man.

For what it’s worth, which is probably not much because I am just one man, I have only dated one woman who happened to have large breasts, and I have mostly been attracted to women who happened to have medium or small breasts, including the woman I am dating now and whom I love to bits. One woman had breast implants - and they feel different - It’s not just about how they look. Also, they do require repeat surgery every several years, which is far from ideal. So get them if you really want them, I guess, but beware.

What tends to attract me, personally, in terms of looks is mostly “natural & healthy” with good hygiene — natural skin (no fake tan), natural tooth color (which means regular enough dental hygiene and teeth brushing but not mega-bleaching), and yes, natural boobs, whichever size they may be. Also I am neither overweight myself, nor attracted to women who are overweight.

To be “sexy enough” in order to get dates in the first place - have fun, and that will make you be fun and attractive! participate in healthy hobbies that make you have fun and feel confident (so anything sporty, or outdoorsy, or cultural, or social and fun without being dependent on alcohol/etc.). And aside from maintaining good personal hygiene (which includes SLEEP as well as diet, ahead of grooming/ washing ) and choosing clothing that suits your body type, don’t worry quite so much about appearance. How you carry yourself and how you feel about yourself is at least as important as looks and probably more so.

No surgery required. And changing your life instead of surgically modifying your body is healthier, more fun, and also cheaper.

And then only date men that make you feel good, and be ready to quickly move on from men that don’t.

You seem very preoccupied with Sidney Sweeney. Who is she?

Exactly. The "right" man for me needs to accept that I have PCOS and can grow a fantastic beard. I do remove my chin hairs, but sometimes can't be bothered for a few days. I also don't always shave my legs, and never shave my public hair.
Any man that isnt happy with that isnt for me.

I've also got huge (saggy) boobs, stretchmarks and need to lose more than a few pounds.

I've never had a problem attracting men (or women). I'm just happier single right now.

Anyone who values a woman's physicality above all is isn't anyone worth bothering with. Believe me, I know this. Pre-cancer, I was a perfect hourglass shape - 28F-24-36. Out of all the men who I attracted, those whom were solely into my looks, especially my physique/my breasts, were all 100% human garbage.

I really think you need to get away from Tik Tok and other social media, and work with a therapist to love yourself as you are.

True but having a ‘nice’ body is part of it. And a man finding a woman alluring does not mean he views her as an object. That’s just one type of man.

It’s like saying, ‘don’t look sexy/ attractive, just stay plain because then you can’t be objectified’.

A woman can look good and the right men won’t objectify her, but they’ll still find her sexy.

@Tiswa She also is quite straight, has no hips or butt, which doesn’t do it for some men. But I was generalising by saying most white men 🙂

I had a friend (mid 40's, two school aged children) who went to the GP as she was having a bit of tummy trouble and feeling tired, nothing major. He said probably nothing but ran some tests to be safe. Long story short, she had cancer, within days she was hospitalised and told there was nothing they could do. She was dead a few weeks later. I went to visit her before she passed and one of the things she told me was "I keep thinking about how i've wasted so much of my life worrying that I'm not pretty enough, not thin enough, not fashionable enough. None of it matters". It really stuck with me. I do like to look nice, I make an effort with my hair, make up etc but when I catch myself obsessing about my appearance or negatively comparing myself to other women now I think of my lovely friend and her children, and I give my head a massive wobble.

Are you looking for quality or quantity? Someone may be attracted to your physical attributes, but that's not enough unless they're also drawn to who you're as a person.

Amen. So many beautiful buttoned up blouses that I'll never be able to wear without puckering, never a comfortable sitting position, back ache when washing pots, dislocating shoulders with age due to weight on my front.

If someone offered to lop em off with hedge shears I'd jump at the bit.

An actress who is really hyped up right now and in the tabloid newspapers/magazines every other day. Has big boobs and is always showing them on Instagram.

Ah, cool. I'll just start removing my large boobs when I'm not on dates then. That way the creeps won't shout 'nice tits' at me when I'm on my way to work. Thank you, I hadn't realised I could chose my breast size depending on the men I was in the vicinity of.
As I said, crack on modifying your body to make it more pleasing for random men you date. A completely healthy, not at all depressing, way to live.

You speak about her dismissively and disrespectfully but want to be like her, I find that confusing.

True but you can have both. Men need the initial spark and the attraction to looks.

I don’t mean to be disrespectful at all, just neutral. I just want larger breasts like her because that’s what all the fuss around her is really about 😂

Nothing against her as a person. She’s just cashing in and trying to make a career.

The post I responded to was talking specifically about big breasts. My point was that this is only one feature of the overall appearance and it can be one which has effects that are as undesirable as the other end of the spectrum. You are talking about a nice body which is the whole thing together, and I agree, an attractive body is good to have, but an attractive body does not equate to big breasts. For me, what makes a woman's body attractive is the overall aesthetics/proportions, of which breast size is one but general build, height, hair style, facial features and voice all contribute. Big breasts on a very slim woman would look out of proportion, but the same breasts on a woman with a larger build may look great.

‘Has big boobs and is always showing them on instagram’? That’s what you aspire to?

Why?

@doublec Well I’m sorry you ended up dating “human garbage” but that doesn’t have to be the case.

I am pear shaped - 28/30B - 22 -36 and only 5ft3. I feel like proportionate implants would improve my figure. I wouldn’t be showing them off though.

No I don’t want to go showing them to everyone, I just want to have them so then I can look sexy for a boyfriend/husband

It’s sad because it suggests you base your self worth on the validation you get from men - validation based on the way you look. I think that men who rate women based purely on their physical appearance are shallow and probably over-influenced by porn, and I don’t think the opinions of people that shallow should have any value.

You are so much more than just your boobs, figure and lips - your intellect and character will always be valuable and special, whereas if you base your value mainly on your looks, when those change with age, what’s left? A man who only wants you for your looks is likely to move on to the next beauty when/if the looks of their current woman fade/change. But I believe that a man who loves the whole person is more likely to be faithful.

I have always been overweight - my dh fell for me, body and mind, and still loves me (and lusts after me) even though I have put on weight, gone grey, got wrinkles and become disabled (thanks, long covid).

I prefer a man to a boy
soneone who appreciates me
the real me
the me with thoughts and hopes and dreams
the me with skills and thoughts and fun
my body is a container for me not me
the social world is so shallow

You do understand that the only reason she’s trending is that some publicity company is promoting her? Men’s preferences vary massively just like women’s do, so if you want them get them for you not for some bloke you don’t know and haven’t met yet but you’ve got sucked into someone’s publicity campaign. This stuff isn’t real. If you’re genuinely 30 it’s concerning that you don’t know this

I really don’t know why you care who has 100k-500k followers. Social media is so so fake. One person’s 10/10 could be another person’s 1/10. And not all men like big boobs.