First Mother’s Day - DH didn’t put anything on socials

[Genie98]

AIBU to be a bit gutted that my DH didn’t put a post up on socials yesterday to mark my first Mother’s Day? My feeds were full of other posts celebrating their Mum’s and I was hoping DH would have done something to mark the occasion. He has done the odd birthday post in the past and posted about our engagement/wedding etc so it’s not that he has never used it.

Just feeling a bit deflated and a bit jealous of my mum friends who had lovely messages and photo’s from their OH’s.

Be glad. Honestly it is so utterly showy and pathetic when people wish someone a happy birthday or happy Mother’s Day or whatever on social media when they can just say it in person or privately via a card or direct message sent to the person.

"Making sure it's heartfelt" 😆 Yes, it does sound mad and ott.

You have a choice OP. I know many mums in their early thirties, not one of them does this! They are too busy living their lives and so should you.

But what is the point of this? What do you gain from posting on social media?
Why do you think people care about what your partner has to say to you for mother's day? If he wants to say you're an amazing mum, then surely it's nicer to say that to your face. Why does posting it on social media make it sound better?
I think it's quite worrying you need to have something posted on social media for it to be valid rather than actually being grateful for what you have.

Bollocks. My DC are 18, 20 and 22 and they are nowhere near this vacuous. You could just delete all your "socials" tomorrow and the world would keep turning and you'd probably be a lot happier. Perhaps you should take this as a sign of how unhinged your behaviour is and just try it.

I seen lots of women make posts about being a mummy to a baby/young child(ren), didn't notice any from their partners.
He likely wouldn't even have thought of it, as it's really not a big deal. You could have made a post celebrating being a mummy , if that's your thing .

No, they don't.
My DC are aged between 29 and 41 and none of them use FB or IG.

I'M 68 and I'm more likely to post on FB than they are - although I only post on the village page. I don't write idiotic posts for birthdays & co.

Och, gie us peace.

Oh grow up

Aw bless you I do feel for your fomo, social media has everyone thinking we have to share everything for it to be real and have this perfect life displayed. I think you’ve been really honest in saying how you really feel and people have rather piled on against you, but you’re only young and just know that one day you genuinely won’t care about socials and you’ll care more that you have a lovely DH that got you flowers, chocs and a roast and that your child is healthy and well. Maybe take a break from socials for a while - they honestly aren’t real. Or shud I say reel ;) sorry couldn’t resist! Big hugs xxx

OP you do sincerely know that even if you grew up in the social media (which I did!) you absolutely can just ignore it? And that it’s all pretend right? A picture of you on a screen or actual, real time with your family?

I am not saying it has to be one or the other - but your choice shows what you value most - real life action over social media fluff, @Genie98.

That's how it is now. If it's not on SM then everything is just second best. No likes, emojis etc. Whole world I have no interest in because it's not real and I have a life that doesn't require validation by others looking at a screen

You sound like an utter knob, to be fair. It takes you longer to curate a social media post than it would to choose a gift? Absolutely ridiculous.

Just saw this on Facebook. How fitting! 🤣🤣

If your so precious about Facebook posts maybe it’s time to come off it and enjoy the real world, I personally don’t see why people should flaunt it to others, the more someone post about how happy they and there partner are the more I think it’s lies, who are they trying to kid, and no I don’t have social media

lol at “variety of opinions”. What was the point in this thread if you ignore a 98% YABU and proceed to give your DH grief over something so utterly juvenile?

The more validation you seek out on SM, the less you see the actual effort those who love you actually put in for you. Don’t live your life like this.

Your leading emotion after Mother’s Day isn’t gratitude at a wonderful day but dissatisfaction at a lack of a social media post. Let that sink in.

My DP and I don’t even follow each other on Instagram. I wouldn’t change that, we don’t need to declare anything to anyone but each other.
He told me as soon as I woke up how wonderful a mum he thinks I am. Those words from his mouth meant everything.
I had a truly wonderful day both with my DD and my own mum. It was a huge day for us, it’s the first time since Xmas my mother left the house and got dressed up and had food in a restaurant due to surgeries and illnesses. I took a gorgeous photo of mum and DD. I can’t stress how much it meant, my mum even coloured her hair the night before just for a casual dinner date with me!

On my SM I posted a photo of the cat. Just the cat.

Please just look inside a little and stop comparing. Most people NEED to show it off. Don’t become those people.

Well I’ve spoke to DH and he was understanding - infact he said it was something he had thought about but time just got away from him in the end and he didn’t just want to post something for the sake of it. I said he could have drafted something in advance, which I think he will do next year.

An adult conversation and no falling out - nothing wrong with demanding certain standards from our men.

This is exactly how the other thread ended up - the OP whinged to her partner, who apologised and said they’d do better.

Clearly you value how things look to randoms on the internet more than the actual deeds of your partner. I despair.

Another made up MN thread of things that never happened part 67374708:

The synchronicity between you and the Birthday Girl poster is indeed the 8th wonder of the world.

Took you out, bought you flowers and a card. Give your head a wobble!

The 400 posters who posted have been wasting their time trying to persuade the OP to steer away from SM. She's been winding you up but hopefully it would have helped other SM addicts who've been lurking...

I think my partner has posted me on his social feed maybe 4 times in the 6 years we’ve been together. Thank god one of those was to announce the birth of our son 😆

He posts only a handful of times a year and mostly they are views from a golf course 😆

I might occasionally hanker after a romantic gushing post, but it’s just not his bag - he’s got other strengths!

If the birthday poster has problems with apostrophes that would be another thing they could have in common.