To have complained about another mum’s swimming ‘costume’

[Raven25]

This morning I went to a weekly parents/young children swimming session with my DD at a national hotel/leisure club chain. We go most weeks and there’s usually a similar crowd in attendance.

It is predominantly other Mum’s who go, with the odd Dad.

Today, one of the other Mum’s was wearing what I can only describe as a thong, in fact it was more of a g string and barely contained her modesty. My DD pointed at her from the pool when she was walking in the opposite direction and asked where her clothes were. I could tell others in the pool had noticed her and didn’t know what to think.

Everyone else was wearing all in one style costumes or the odd bikini which actually fits.

I found this completely inappropriate given it was a swimming session for toddlers/young children, that outfit was more appropriate for someone on only fans!

On the way out, I spoke to one of the staff on reception and asked them whether they enforce certain standards to which I was told it’s up to visitors what they wear but they draw the line at any full nudity - which I’d argue this was. They didn’t seem too bothered and the young female colleague listening in next to her said ‘it’s nice to see a mum with that much confidence’ which I felt was rude. It’s not about confidence, it’s about respect.

I’ve got home and told DH who thinks I was ridiculous to complain and says he’d be embarrassed to turn up there with me next time we go to the gym together!

Jealously is a horrible trait.

I'm surprised at the comments. I saw someone in a thong bikini at a beach for the first time last year and I was really surprised by it and felt a bit awkward about it in front of my young sons. I'd be very surprised at seeing it in a swimming pool and would not think it was at all appropriate.

Why is that always the reaction?

Maybe the OP actually means what she said?

Agreed. And her daughter has seemingly learned that rudeness from somewhere.

Do we really have to fall back on being misogynistically catty when a woman dares to have even basic standards of public decency? Lots of veiled assumptions that the op is jealous or not as thin etc.

I've got an arse you can bounce a penny off. I still have no desire to show it all off to little children at a swimming pool.

I'm with you op, though I wouldn't have bothered to complain. Vulgar is in vogue right now, but I'm sure it will eventually swing back.

Honestly can’t believe you complained! Let her live her life and you live yours. It had zero effect on your ability to swim and enjoy the class!

My local pool has posters up showing what is acceptable swimwear in the public pool. It’s a while since I’ve been so I can’t remember what was on it but things like you can wear tight fitting long sleeves and legs but not big baggy trousers, you should wear a swimming hat if your hair is longer than a particular length etc. Roll these out I say!

Op needs to stop staring at women like a creep and concentrate on her child in the swimming pool.

If it were a public place, I don’t think complaining would have been useful, but as it’s a private club that you pay membership fees to, I think it’s fine to expect them to uphold a certain standard of decency, and to express your opinion.

I would be upset with this in front of children. It just seems to fly in the face of any feminist message we try to pass on to our daughters

Last time I went on holiday, most of the women were wearing thong bikinis, not one person looked good in it, all the buttocks were horrid and full of cellulite. One young girl who had quite a nice figure turned around and her buttocks were all lumpy and awful. If people are going to wear them at least check in a mirror before you go out

Why do you care?

I think most would raise an eyebrow at a thong on a parent/dc swim session.

I doubt many would complain though because what can pool staff do, there isn't a swimming pool dress code as long as genitals are covered.

It’s not for me, but I’d not have complained.

I’m always quite shocked at just how little clothing people wear. But then I think if we went back far enough people were routinely having sex in public spaces and anything went basically. Would I have complained? Probably not. Do I think your husband should say he’s embarrassed to go with you next time - no, I think he’s a twat.

All look fine to me! 🤷🏼‍♀️

Yes, French swimming pools are full of men crammed into compulsory tiny Speedos to the point I could probably produce an accurate drawing of their genitals. I’ve managed to refrain from reaching for my smelling salts. Ditto many European beaches with women sunbathing topless.

Why were you watching her prancing up and down rather than concentrating on your DDs swim lesson?

Thongs are not for me but I wouldn't have complained about someone else wearing one.

Hate thong swimwear on both sexes. Cover your arses, people!

I’d be equal parts horrified and jealous 😂 but I wouldn’t have complained - I’d have just probably said really loudly something along the lines “of gosh don’t some people like to have it all on show” but then again I’m the sort to announce loudly that a man in a loudly revving car is likely making up for certain inadequacies elsewhere

Until a few years ago it was generally considered indecent to have buttocks on show too.

She's probably someone who's constantly after attention, so gets it by waving her bare arse around at children.

I would be very surprised and would judge her for that. I don’t think this was appropriate costume for this fort of activity. Not sure about complaining but I could have asked about rules on the reception, more out of curiosity.

I can’t understand why your DH is embarrassed to go with you next time. Does he usually wear thongs when visiting this swimming pool?

Ha yes maybe next time be all friendly and say I so admire your confidence for wearing a thong with such a lumpy arse. Bet that'll put a stop to it .

Actually imagine the fun you could have by watching your husbands face if you decided to wear the style of swimwear the other mum was wearing. He is so nonchalant about it until you put it on I bet.