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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this photo is not appropriate to advertise a dress?

277 replies

TheGoodEnoughWife · 21/03/2025 18:49

Is it just my raging feminist thoughts with this photo that is being used as one of the pictures of a dress offered for sale on a high street store website. Is this appropriate? I don't think it is but one might say that that is my weird view and actually it is a perfectly okay pic? (!)
I think it looks like a 'come fuck me' picture and that is not okay?!

To think this photo is not appropriate to advertise a dress?
OP posts:
Smallsalt · 21/03/2025 23:51

I mean, it's not screaming "Buy me".

She looks like she escaped from a unit.

KimberleyClark · 22/03/2025 00:06

Toseland · 21/03/2025 20:26

M&S and John Lewis are deliberately choosing very masculine or androgenous models to push and normalise the 'transgender look'. Possibly being paid by the trans lobby for doing so. This model is probably just a bloke manspreading.

So androgynous or masculine looking women are no longer acceptable are they?

TinyRebel · 22/03/2025 00:10

Completely inappropriate to use men to advertise women’s clothing, yes. He has feet like yachts!

Pinkelephant66 · 22/03/2025 00:20

Are we sure it’s a man?? I’m usually very good at spotting even the most ‘convincing’ ones!

divad707 · 22/03/2025 00:34

Something is way off! This was meant obviously for attention or point or to test males as pervs? Possibilities are endless. Regardless she is a lady and lime all deserves respect. But if this lady came and sat in front of me like that I will assume....lil too comfortable?

steff13 · 22/03/2025 00:36

It's an odd angle. Her legs look crazy long in her feet look huge. I don't really think it looks particularly sexual though.

Pandimoanymum · 22/03/2025 00:42

I don't think it looks remotely "come hither" and it's just not a flattering photo at all. Plus, I like to see how the clothes hang, I don't like photos when the models are sitting and clothes are scrunched up. So from that perspective it's not great as an advert either.

AInightingale · 22/03/2025 08:14

KimberleyClark · 22/03/2025 00:06

So androgynous or masculine looking women are no longer acceptable are they?

The point is most British women aren't extremely tall and angular. It's got nothing to do with it being 'acceptable', it's just this odd way that fashion houses create and cut clothes for figures that don't reflect the majority of women, then defends using models like this because 'the clothes look better on them.' I think the whole process is misogynistic and has been for a while, long before the use of trans models.

Tandora · 22/03/2025 08:16

KimberleyClark · 22/03/2025 00:06

So androgynous or masculine looking women are no longer acceptable are they?

It’s despicable isn’t it. The comments on this thread- just go to show.

KimberleyClark · 22/03/2025 08:17

AInightingale · 22/03/2025 08:14

The point is most British women aren't extremely tall and angular. It's got nothing to do with it being 'acceptable', it's just this odd way that fashion houses create and cut clothes for figures that don't reflect the majority of women, then defends using models like this because 'the clothes look better on them.' I think the whole process is misogynistic and has been for a while, long before the use of trans models.

Models have always been extremely tall and angular but they haven’t’t been accused of being men until now.

Riverswims · 22/03/2025 08:20

it’s an anti advertisement to me 😬

StarlightLady · 22/03/2025 08:21

What an awful picture! But to my mind it certainly does not suggest “come fuck me”, far from it. More like “l am really pissed off and want to go home.

EG94 · 22/03/2025 08:27

I can’t help but think she used to be a he. That would explain a lot but I don’t think that pose says take me to bed. I think it says stay the fuck away from me or ill boot you with my size 12’s

Boredlass · 22/03/2025 08:27

No it doesn’t

Longma · 22/03/2025 08:28

It’s not a great angle and makes the model’s legs look disproportionate to the rest of their body.
it doesn’t show the dress off at all, though assume it’s one of a series of different angles.

i don’t think it looks overly sexual, no.

Idratherbepaddleboarding · 22/03/2025 08:31

I think it’s meant to be more “relaxed” than “come fuck me” but it’s a crap picture to advertise the dress. I hate it when companies provide posed pictures where you can’t even see what the clothes look like!

BurgundyZero · 22/03/2025 10:42

I love the shoe. Gimme the shoes.

Styleislost · 22/03/2025 10:56

TheGoodEnoughWife · 21/03/2025 19:39

Women don't tend to sit with their legs open. To have a picture of a woman sitting with her legs open is provocative because of that. That is why I feel it off. As much as folk say it isn't sexual women don't sit around like that. They really don't. Why have a woman sitting with her legs open to advertise a dress? Why?

This is my opinion! Which I am allowed lol for all those up in arms that women can sit however they like thank you very much.

But you are saying that. You described the pose as a ‘come fuck me’.

Women try and sit with their legs closed because a sexist society branded it as ‘unlady-like’. By saying women sat with their legs open are automatically saying ‘come fuck me’ you are upholding the ‘it’s not lady-like’ stance and saying women who don’t sit with their knees together are communicating ‘come fuck me’ to the whole world.

You can hold any opinion you want. But other people can point it that it’s not a ‘raging feminist’ point of view, neither is ‘sitting with out your legs closed is saying come fuck me’ and comes across as quite the opposite.

Stickystickysticky · 22/03/2025 16:18

TheGoodEnoughWife · 21/03/2025 19:46

Okay. I am not saying that women sitting like that is inviting sexual contact but I don't think women do sit like that and using that pose as an advert is off because of that. Clearly I am alone in that and that is fine. Interesting to hear other views though.

(And no I don't walk around looking to be offended. But I do think there is a lot of crap stuff out there and it does piss me off)

When I am at home and relaxed my legs are not clamped together, my muscles relax and my knees part. If I'm on a train then I either cross my legs or make a conscious effort to keep my knees together.

Whoarethoseguys · 22/03/2025 16:21

It just looks like a young woman relaxing and sitting the way she wants to
I don't think there is the slightest thing offensive about it.

Whoarethoseguys · 22/03/2025 16:23

TheGoodEnoughWife · 21/03/2025 19:39

Women don't tend to sit with their legs open. To have a picture of a woman sitting with her legs open is provocative because of that. That is why I feel it off. As much as folk say it isn't sexual women don't sit around like that. They really don't. Why have a woman sitting with her legs open to advertise a dress? Why?

This is my opinion! Which I am allowed lol for all those up in arms that women can sit however they like thank you very much.

I do when I'm at home. And why shouldn't women sit with their legs open?

Gettingbysomehow · 22/03/2025 16:55

MistyGray · 21/03/2025 19:31

What's wrong with big feet though? I'm finding the comments about how big her feet are really uncomfortable. I have size 8s and for most of my teenage life really struggled with the 'stigma' of having big feet, as though this was something I chose to have. Would you be so quick to comment on the size of their nose? Or their ears? It's very judgemental 😞

There is nothing wrong with big feet, my mum has size 9s and always looks great but they do insist on putting the models in the most unflattering shoes and posing them feet first so they look like clown shoes.
Mary Jane ballet flats suck on anyone that isn't 12 years old.

steff13 · 22/03/2025 17:06

KimberleyClark · 22/03/2025 08:17

Models have always been extremely tall and angular but they haven’t’t been accused of being men until now.

This true. We have to remember that models are chosen to show off clothes. So they are traditionally women who have fairly indistinct shapes. The designers want them to look like a human hanger basically.

BraveSirRobinRanaway · 22/03/2025 17:29

KimberleyClark · 22/03/2025 08:17

Models have always been extremely tall and angular but they haven’t’t been accused of being men until now.

I think it’s because it’s a fairly recent practice for advertisers to quietly slip models that are not female into the female clothing sections. Possibly so they can triumphantly claim that trans ppl have been advertising women’s clothing for ‘ages’ and imply that our objection to that is recent and therefore unacceptable (the oft repeated refrain).

An alternative possibility is that male models were often paid less (I don’t know if that’s still the case) so maybe it’s cheaper to use them than women?

IMO this model just looks a bit fed up and grumpy and doesn’t make me want to buy the dress.

Ritasueandbobtoo9 · 22/03/2025 17:33

I can’t say that big footed man spreading types inspire me to buy their shitty denim dress.