What's everyone's favourite joke

[Anon9898]

My boys have none uniform day and have to go to school with a joke?

What is everyone's favourite CLEAN joke

What's the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi?

The people of Dubai don't like the Flintstones, but the people of Abu Dhabi Dooooooooo

Why are all these jokes about rabbits and elephants?

There's 20 cows in a field. Which one is on holiday?

The one with the wee calf (week aff!)

Ding ding ding 🏆 😂

Why don't werewolves ever know what time it is?

Because they're not when-wolves.

Probably my boss!!

Clueless but a nice guy 😝

I don't know, why are all these jokes about rabbits and elephants?😁

Because they're a rare bit heavy?

Why did the jelly baby go to school?

He wanted to be a smartie

Best I could think of. I'm not Oscar Wilde.

”Waiter, bring me an alligator sandwich and make it snappy!”

More elephant jokes...

Why do elephants wear big green floppy hats?
So they can crawl across snooker tables undetected. Bet you've never seen an elephant on a snooker table...
Shows it works then.

Why should you not go into the jungle between 2 & 4 pm?
Because that's when the elephants practice their parachute jumps.
Why have crocodiles got flattened snouts?
Because they went into the jungle between 2 & 4 pm.

Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the toilet?

Because the ‘p’ is silent

Bit blue, that one. We can't be having any blue around here. There's a child's tricycle outside these doors. (To paraphrase Peter Kay's Phoenix Nights.)

What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
"I'm eighty!" (Aye matey)

What did the Buddhist monk say at Pizza Hut?

”Make me one with everything.”

Why did the Teddy not eat his dinner ?

He was already stuffed 😂😂

What's green and pear shaped? A pear.
What's brown and runs round the garden? A fence.

What kind of plant grows out of your pants?

Bumboo

DS’s current favourites:

What do you get if you cross a cow with a unicorn?
A moo-nicorn

What do you call an Octopus with socks on?
A Socktopus

What does Santa say when he’s gardening? Grow, grow, grow (or mow mow mow!)

This is my favourite too!

What's blue and fluffy?

Blue fluff

Why are pirates called pirates?

because they AAAAAARRRRRRRRR

So my neighbour knocked on my door at 1:30am this morning!
My FRONT door!
Luckily, I was already up playing the bagpipes