To be upset that fellow holiday goer told me I'm too old for my hair?

[MoneyPieceNotMoneyShot]

I'm rising 60 and have been obese all my life, have just got it under control, gone on a glow up and have decided to Fuuckit and I've headed off on my holiday of a lifetime.

I've spent most of today with another solo traveller and quite enjoyed her company, but am fully aware she's from a more forthright culture than me. (A close friend from home is also this nationality so I'm fully aware of this conversational style).

As we parted company she said that she felt she had to tell me that at my age I should be considering getting my hair cut to a more age appropriate length.

I fricking love my hair, my hairdresser has been with me through literal thick and thin, and had particularly encouraged me nurturing my length after The Bad Bad Bob Incident of October 23.

Low self confidence and self esteem through being morbidly obese for 30 years doesn't lend itself to resilience, so I'm now in my room trying to distract myself and win the day back to no avail.

Aibu to be upset or am I a soft numpty?

I'm not saying anything of the sort. Have you quoted the wrong poster?

I'm of the 'STFU about other women's choices' persuasion.

OP I started a whole thread on older (much older than you) ladies all being given the same bob whatever they asked for. I was considering having a pixie cut and then growing it to where I wanted it (iyswim), but that's ridiculous isn't it? You've inspired me to be myself, I'm going to keep my (rather nice and wavy) hair long and spend the money on some nice hair products and a lippie instead. Thank you! I'm really shocked at your companions rudeness though, is that really acceptable anywhere?

You do you - and ignore comments that have no bearing on what you do!!

🤣bad bad bob incident of oct'23. Thanks for that 😁
Well at your age, if you love your hair, keep it.
And keep being fabulous and proud of yourself.
💐

I can't imagine caring about some random person's opinion to be honest. I only listen to the opinions of people I really respect.

Why do you think it bothered you, do you think maybe you put too much stock into what everyone says without filtering it?

My Grandmother was always on at my mum to ' have a good hair cut' once she hit about 45. My mum has glorious hair and it looks ridiculous short, she still has longer hair now at nearly 80. I think women cut their hair once they were married , maybe left over from when women pinned their hair up once they were married in Edwardian/ Victorian times?

your friend sounds bloody rude OP!

Lol, I was going to say Dutch too. I have a very good friend who is Dutch who, when I first met her, took me surprise by her very direct approach. I learnt quickly that this just their no nonsense approach to things and is very much a Dutch thing.

Some women have weird rules about hair. I don’t know where they get them from. The past?

Yet you post on a chatboard. What's the point of that then based on your 'I only listen to the opinions of people I really respect...' blether?

You're being sneery because the OP was hurt by a comment. Bad form.

Sorry
I think it was the quote you had quoted I was trying to quote IYSWIM

Take no notice! I worked with a man who said nobody over 40 should wear jeans 😀(he was hardly a fashion icon himself 🙄). I wish I'd never cut my hair from mid back length, since menopause it won't grow much past my shoulders, even during lockdown without being cut for 7 months, so you hang onto it 🙂.

There are made up rules and regulations for everything pertaining to appearance, if you look hard enough and worry too much about other people's opinions.

Don't wear a short skirt, don't wear jeans, don't use a rucksack, don't have long hair - fuck off to the lot of them. Wear what you want, have the hair style you want and who cares if it's not appropriate, according to someone somewhere whose opinion is irrelevant.

On the one hand, in a way it's nice to have a friend like this, who will tell it to you straight (from their perspective, at least). Even though it stings, now you have one other person's true opinion about your hairstyle, for consideration.

On the other hand, it stings. As everyone knows, the only possible remedy for that is revenge. Carefully consider what her biggest flaw is, then tell her about it. Come back and report the results. 😂

I agree!

You have lovely long hair that you love, and you are going out and enjoying yourself. Don't let some silly twit tell you what is or is not age appropriate.

She is wrong and sounds jealous of your new found confidence and enthusiasm
and wanted to take you down a peg. DON'T LET HER!!!
If she starts up again, tell its 2025 and you'll do what you like thanks very much. But I've be finding some new travelling acquaintances.
Enjoy the rest of your travels! x

Oh. Yes, and if you don't have one already, treat yourself to an Airwrap! Sounds like you deserve it.

OP, she's an idiot. There's no such thing as too old to have the hairstyle (or general style, come to that) you want. Don't even give her a moment of headspace, the 'short hair after a certain age' thing is so outmoded these days.

Signed, a fellow getting-close-to-60 long hair lover.

Is your friend living under a rock? My dd17 has highlights all the time, she is also training to be a hairdresser. All her friends are asking her to do their highlights.

"As we parted company she said that she felt she had to tell me that at my age I should be considering getting my hair cut to a more age appropriate length."
next time you see her.
I feel I should tell you to keep your unsolicited opinion to yourself. I like my hair which is all that matters. I am hot as fuck. I feel I should tell you people tend to really dislike rude people who offer their unwanted opinions on others appearance. Someone else might not be as polite as me as point out your no supermodel yourself love.

I'm nearly 70 and have long hair which is kept in great nick by my hairdresser. It's just her opinion after all, you don't have to agree with her. Fuck that.

Bloody hell.

Forthright? I call that bloody rude. What does she think gives her the right to go around spouting her nasty spiteful rubbish? And why does she think anyone would give a shit about her daft opinions?

Have a wonderful holiday and keep on loving your long hair; there's no such thing as 'age appropriate hair'.

I'm 76 and I'm currently growing my hair longer after being at the mercy of a scissor happy hairdresser.

You should have told her to get stuffed!!

I always wonder what an age appropriate length is.

I think an age appropriate response is to ask her if she is confused and thinks it is 1925 and not 2025 and maybe she should see a doctor if she doesn’t know the world has moved on from the narrow minded ideas of yesteryear

I think this is a greater problem you need to sort out for yourself. This person was just a trigger. Find a phrase that you can use in any situation in the future that triggers you. i.e. Do you have a problem with my hair? Why would you say that? Or, I am quite happy with my hair, thank you, and will not change it. It is only when these people are confronted , that they will stop.

I knew immediately it was Dutch. It takes a bit of getting used to. I think it's because their forthright comments are usually in such perfect English it's easy to forget they are a very different culture.

This isn’t about what she looks like it is purely based on age.

it’s like those helpful adverts of how to dress at 20+ 30+ etc

All the 60+ suggestions I would never ever wear voluntarily
They are hideously old fashioned

How mean of anyone to give you an unwanted opinion about your looks, using a very old fashioned measure I may add.

Women get put down throughout their lives for everything they should/shouldn’t do and I'm pleased to see that tide finally turning. You can be whoever YOU want to be and look however YOU feel confident.

I'm glad she was a good companion on holiday but to be perfectly honest, she doesn't sound like someone you need in your every day life.

Stay beautiful and embrace every aspect of yourself that you love x