To think if you’ve been beautiful all your life

[Itssundayiminlove]

It must be very difficult to age?

I was lovely looking when younger, ok older, but never beautiful or even pretty, but nice when younger. I have a friend who I haven’t seen for a few years, she was always absolutely stunning. I’ve just seen a picture of her and there’s a big difference in how she looks now (we’re mid-late 40’s now)

It got me thinking how that must be even harder than for the average person ageing?

I wasn’t asking what is was about you. Face or clothes or bearing. I was explaining why some people might be asking to see a picture because you assumed it was so they could critique you. It’s likely more that even globally re known beauties in real life don’t cause bike accidents. So people are understandably interested in seeing what someone who did cause traffic to stop looked like

Men can be pervy - they do this sort of thing.

Mumsnet is always like this - nobody is allowed to say they’re attractive without being called Samantha Brick.

Interesting. I've always looked like the back end of a bus, so I'm not particularly mourning the proliferation of wrinkles and grey hairs. I've done OK in life so far despite being plain-looking; plenty of male attention, decent jobs and promotions, etc. I have sometimes wondered what it would have been like to be very attractive, though.

I have no reason to lie.

I just think beauty is very subjective. What some people find beautiful others don’t, so I think it’s very conceited to say ‘I’m beautiful’ because you don’t know what other people think. It’s very presumptuous.

i’ve always felt women have a tendency to overplay each others beauty.

I just think that people falling off bikes because they have seen someone so stunningly beautiful that they can control themselves, is a load of shite. That only happens in really crappy movies.

I have no reason to lie.

I think it’s posture , good bone structure and maintaining a healthy weight .

I see it as a big advantage of having been a munter since birth. I hated being the ugly duckling as a youngster, but on the plus side, as I age I have nothing to lose.

I have known beautiful people who struggle with it and some who welcome the escape from the attention, not all of which is positive.

I think this. When people talk about how for some women the ageing process hits them hard due to the lack of validation and attention from others…given I never had this, being mid 40s to me is not much different to being early 20s.

Being decidely “average” all my life has been a blessing in disguise!

Yes it’s usually ones who put on a lot of weight who become unrecognisable because fat completely changes features.

You also have no idea why he ‘fell off his bike’ could be lots of reasons, not necessarily your stunning looks. Who knows? Only he really knows the reason. Frankly I’m not convinced have only seen this happen in carry on movies! 😂

I agree. The way I feel about it is that I have young adult daughters and it’s now their time to turn heads and be young and beautiful. There is something rather pathetic about wanting to look 25 forever. And I think it shows a lack of maturity to not be able to accept it. My daughter’s dad is like that. He’s very good looking but at 56 he has started to look his age now and I have noticed him becoming even more childish and sulky than he was before 🤦🏻‍♀️

He was staring me directly in the eyes and lost control of his bike while doing so.

But believe what you like. It doesn't change the facts.

Honestly, what is this desire to bash women for daring to say that they're attractive? I don't understand it. I've never felt like I need to drag others down like this.

I must be pretty blind or unaware but from this thread I should be bumping into stunning looking women every few paces!
I rarely see women that I think are stunning or I've known girls be stunning I there 20s and have become no longer stunning in their 40s. I think there are some albeit a small minority who retain their looks and look absolutely fabulous at whatever age.

It’s not about wanting to look 25, it’s about the fact that many women look better in their 40s than their 20s and turn heads. Some people on this thread sound really down on themselves about themselves getting older.

Ignore them, people can be spiteful (whilst masquerading it as humour). Back in my glory days, I had a bloke slam the brakes on his bike, drop it to the floor, come up to me and say 'I'll never forgive myself if I don't find out what your name is?'

Yes. Literally the only piece of advice my grandmother ever gave me was to focus on learning and because looks are temporary, and women who get by on looks struggle later on. Weird advice granny but valid.

I am still so beautiful that I have to be careful cycling past a shop window lest I catch a glimpse of my reflection and fall off my own bike.

Only joking @NewMagicWand as someone has to own up to good looks if @Itssundayiminloveis going to have their original question answered!

Absolutely this. I’m not sure I’ve ever been one of of life’s great beauties, but I’ve always been attractive and had a nice figure. It’s only now I’m close to 40 that I realise how much that’s formed part of my identity and how apprehensive I am about losing it.

All of the threads on here about how it all goes to shit when you hit perimenopause absolutely terrify me, especially the fact you apparently lose your waist as I’ve always liked having an hourglass figure.

I think that more attractive people tend to stay more attractive, relative to their peers. If you start comparing yourself to a 25 year old then you’re on to a loser, but realistically, are late 40s women competing with 25 years olds?

Being beautiful was always what I was known for. It was a major, major aspect of my identity, right up until my early 50s. I used to think I would struggle massively when I lost it. Now I'm early 60s, I'm still good looking for my age but no longer beautiful, and I've been amazed at how readily I've accepted it.

Sure I sometimes miss that feeling and the life that went with it, but generally I'm remarkably unbothered. Maybe having an all-consuming vocation helps as I have no time to navel-gaze. Whatever it is I'm relieved as I was expecting it to be really hard.

I mean men will stare at anything so not sure it’s really that much of a compliment